chapter 7: Memory Recovery Therapy (a.k.a Absolute Nonsense)

Verbena stood proudly in front of a giant chalkboard she had forced the servants to drag into the drawing room. On the board, she had drawn a Very ugly stick figure couple, with arrows pointing at their heads labeled ME and HIM (Villain Husband).

Theodore sat across from her, lazily sipping tea, his expression caught between amusement and exhaustion. "What is this now?"

"This," Verbena announced dramatically, "is my official Memory Recovery Plan!"

Theodore raised an eyebrow. "I didn't realize stupidity could be so…structured."

She ignored the insult. "There are three stages to my therapy."

She banged her pointer stick against the board.

"Stage 1: Facial Reconnection Therapy!"

"Sounds illegal," Theodore muttered.

"In this stage," Verbena continued, "I will stare at your face for exactly ten minutes every morning, hoping it will trigger some romantic flashbacks."

Theodore put down his tea. "You want to stare at me for ten minutes?"

"Romantic flashbacks don't just appear on their own! The face must be absorbed into the soul."

Theodore leaned back, arms crossed. "Fine. Start now."

She wasn't expecting that.

"W-Wait, I need emotional background music. And rose petals."

"No."

So, without petals or music, Verbena forced herself to gaze directly into her villain husband's face. Unfortunately, Theodore Hellgrave had a face built to ruin lives. Sharp jawline, sinful smirk, eyes that looked like they could either murder you or make you fall in love—no in between.

She lasted twenty seconds before slapping her own cheeks.

"Why are you blushing?" Theodore asked lazily.

"I'm not blushing! My soul is just…warm from all the facial reconnecting!"

"Sure."

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"Stage 2: Romantic Re–enactment Therapy!"

"What fresh hell is this?" Theodore asked.

Verbena pulled out a heavily plagiarized script she had written after binge-reading trashy romance novels the night before.

"We must recreate our most passionate, dramatic scenes!" she said.

"Passionate scenes?" Theodore echoed.

"Yes! All great couples have at least one scene where the heroine falls off a cliff and the hero catches her dramatically, or where they fight under a thunderstorm and then—"

"No."

"But—"

"No."

So instead, Verbena forced Theodore to reenact a completely fake 'proposal scene' in the garden.

"You got down on one knee," she narrated. "The moonlight was perfect, my dress was blowing dramatically in the wind, and you said—"

"I said, 'If you don't shut up and marry me, I'll throw you into the lake.'"

"THEODORE!"

"Historical accuracy is important."

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"Stage 3: Love Letter Therapy!"

"Please tell me this doesn't involve glitter," Theodore said, already exhausted.

Verbena pulled out a stack of pink scented paper and a dozen heart–shaped stamps. "Every night, I will write love letters to my mysterious, forgotten husband, expressing my tragic longing for the memories we've lost!"

Theodore rubbed his temples. "We're not lost lovers. You literally live down the hall."

She dramatically pressed the back of her hand to her forehead. "But my memories live in the distant mist of my broken mind! It's tragic!"

"It's stupid."

Ignoring him, Verbena began writing her first letter aloud.

"To My Mysterious Husband,"

"Every time I see your face, my heart trembles like a baby deer trapped in a blizzard."

Theodore made a choking sound.

"Though my mind is blank, my soul whispers your name in the wind. Were we secret lovers? Were you my forbidden enemy? Did we kiss under a tree, or was it a chandelier?"

"What the hell kind of chandelier romance are you imagining?"

She glared. "Don't interrupt the muse."

"Even though you are wicked, cruel, and possibly plotting to kill me, I can't help but feel…something dangerous and sweet when you smile."

Theodore actually laughed.

"Stop laughing! It's serious!"

"It's insane."

But even as he mocked her, Theodore couldn't deny one thing — watching Verbena invent these ridiculous schemes was oddly entertaining.

And somewhere deep down (very, very deep down), he wondered…

What if she actually did fall for him? Not because of some fake memories, but because of their real ones — the twisted, strange, ridiculous story only the two of them shared?

For now, though, he'd settle for watching his dramatic wife write embarrassing love letters in pink glitter ink, and plotting how to torture her back when she least expected it.

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The end of chapter 7

WARNING

This is the original version of the webnovel "villain husband, please sign the divorce papers" by the author "Hanagaki Ryuka". Please don't copyright or upload it in your name

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1O1cON4UEjsjFPMZxqNSY425-fdHW19779uAKscbDsy8/edit?usp=drivesdk