Adrian

Chapter 33: Please Don't Leave Me

(Adrian's POV )

She should have run.

She should have screamed.

She should have done anything but this.

But Amber was still here.

Holding my hands.

Even though I could see the fear in her eyes.

Even though I could hear her heart pounding.

Even though she had every reason to walk away.

She stayed.

And I didn't know if that made this better or worse.

—

"Do you want to kill me too?"

Her words cut through me.

Like a blade slicing through skin.

Like a wound that wouldn't heal.

I felt my entire body lock up.

Because I had never thought about it.

Not once.

Not until now.

—

"Never," I whispered, voice hoarse.

Her breath hitched.

Because she knew I meant it.

Because she knew—despite everything, I could never hurt her.

But that didn't change the truth.

I was still a monster.

And she?

She was still human.

—

I swallowed hard, forcing myself to look at her.

To face the terror in her eyes.

To accept that this might be the last time she ever looked at me like this.

Like I was just Adrian.

Like I wasn't something to fear.

But that was gone now.

Because she knew the truth.

She knew what I was.

And no matter how badly I wanted her to stay—

I couldn't ask her to.

I couldn't be selfish.

Even if it was the one thing I wanted most in the world.

—

"You should leave," I muttered.

Her fingers tensed around mine.

Like she didn't expect me to say it.

Like she thought I'd fight for her.

And I wanted to.

God, I wanted to.

But I couldn't.

Not when she looked at me like this.

Not when she finally knew the truth.

—

She didn't move.

Didn't let go.

Didn't do anything.

She just stood there, watching me.

Like she was waiting.

Like she was searching for something in my face.

And I hated it.

Because I already knew—

She was about to break me.

—

"Adrian," she murmured.

I exhaled sharply. "Don't."

Her eyebrows furrowed. "Don't what?"

"Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you still care."

Her breath hitched.

Because she did.

Because no matter what I was—

She still cared.

And that?

That was going to be my undoing.

—

"I should hate you," she whispered.

I swallowed hard. "I know."

"You lied to me."

"I know."

"You're a murderer."

My throat tightened.

And I forced the words out.

"I know."

—

Silence.

Tense. Heavy.

I could hear her heartbeat.

I could feel her breath against my skin.

And it was killing me.

Because she wasn't letting go.

And I didn't know how to handle that.

—

Finally, she whispered, soft, hesitant—

"Tell me everything."

I exhaled sharply.

"You don't want to know."

She took a step closer. "Yes, I do."

I clenched my fists.

"You'll regret it," I muttered.

She shook her head. "Let me decide that."

—

I stared at her.

And I knew—this was it.

This was the moment I either gave her the truth or let her go forever.

So I did.

I told her everything.

—

I told her about Eleanor.

How she was the first person I ever loved.

How she made me feel human, even when I wasn't.

How she died because of me.

Because I was too weak.

Because I let my hunger win.

Because I was a monster.

—

Amber listened.

She didn't interrupt.

Didn't try to comfort me.

Didn't say, "It's not your fault."

Because we both knew it was.

And somehow, that made this hurt even more.

—

By the time I was done, my hands were shaking.

My throat was tight.

My chest ached.

I had spent centuries burying this.

Centuries pretending it didn't matter anymore.

But it did.

God, it did.

And now?

Now she knew.

And I couldn't take it back.

—

I inhaled sharply, stepping back.

Bracing myself for her to walk away.

For her to say she couldn't do this.

For her to tell me I was a monster and she'd never forgive me.

I deserved it.

I was ready for it.

But what I wasn't ready for?

What I never expected?

Was for her to pull me into her arms.

—

My body locked up.

Because Amber Rose—this stubborn, infuriating, impossible girl—

Was hugging me.

Holding me.

Like I wasn't something to fear.

Like I wasn't a monster.

Like I was just… Adrian.

—

I let out a shaky breath.

And then, without thinking—

Without stopping myself—

I broke.

—

I collapsed into her.

My forehead pressed against her shoulder.

My hands clutched her waist, desperate, aching.

And I let the tears fall.

Because I couldn't hold them in anymore.

Because I was so goddamn tired.

Because I had been alone for so long.

And now, finally—

Someone stayed.

—

She didn't say anything.

Didn't tell me to stop.

Didn't pull away.

She just held me.

Let me breathe.

Let me break.

Like she wasn't afraid.

Like she wasn't leaving.

And for the first time in centuries—

I felt something other than hunger.

I felt human.

—

I exhaled shakily, fingers trembling.

"Don't leave," I whispered.

Amber swallowed.

And then, softly—

"I won't."

—

I believed her.

Even if I shouldn't.

Even if I knew—this wouldn't last.

I believed her.

Because right now?

She was all I had left.

And I wasn't letting go.

Not now.

Not ever.

—