Chapter 11: The Dao of the Wooden Duck
Shen Mu sat motionless in his chair, staring at the ceiling with dead eyes.
The Heavenly Empress had finally left. The Earth Immortal had stopped groveling. Bai Ling, Elder Zhao, and the others had departed in deep contemplation.
For the first time in what felt like ages, his courtyard was… quiet.
He let out a long, exhausted sigh.
"…Finally."
It was over.
No more misunderstandings. No more kneeling cultivators. No more people treating his random furniture like divine artifacts.
He could just sit here and—
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Loud knocking slammed against the gate.
Shen Mu twitched violently.
'NO. NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT.'
He stormed toward the door, ripped it open—
And nearly had a heart attack.
Standing outside…
Was a massive crowd of cultivators.
Hundreds. Maybe thousands.
And every single one of them was staring at him with reverence.
Shen Mu's soul left his body.
"…No."
One of the cultivators stepped forward and cupped his fists respectfully.
"Master Shen," he said solemnly, "we have come… to seek guidance on the Dao of the Wooden Duck."
Shen Mu almost screamed.
'WHAT DO YOU MEAN DAO OF THE WOODEN DUCK?!'
---
Meanwhile, In the Celestial Realm…
Empress Yue stood on the balcony of her divine palace, gazing down upon the mortal world below.
Her fingers tapped lightly against the stone railing. She had been unable to stop thinking about their encounter.
"…The Dao of Simplicity."
Her soft voice echoed through the air.
Her attendants stood behind her, watching nervously. The Empress had never been this contemplative before.
A celestial elder finally stepped forward, bowing respectfully.
"Your Majesty," he said cautiously, "have you truly gained insight from this… Dao?"
Empress Yue closed her eyes, remembering Shen Mu's words.
> "Too many cultivators seek complex truths… when the greatest wisdom is often found in the most ordinary things."
Her fingers curled slightly.
"…I wish to understand more."
The elder's eyes widened. "T-Then… does this mean…?"
Empress Yue's gaze sharpened.
"…We will observe him further."
---
Back at the Workshop…
Shen Mu pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Let me get this straight," he said, his voice dangerously calm. "You all came here… because of the wooden duck?"
The lead cultivator nodded seriously. "Indeed."
Another disciple stepped forward. "Master Shen, after hearing about the Heavenly Empress's reaction to your wisdom, our sect master immediately ordered us to come here and study under you!"
Shen Mu felt a migraine forming.
'I JUST CARVED A RANDOM DUCK!'
"I heard that those who meditate upon the duck will gain enlightenment…"
"I heard it represents the balance of Yin and Yang!"
"Nonsense! It clearly embodies the Three Thousand Dao Principles!"
Shen Mu could not believe his ears.
A group of elite cultivators had gathered here to… worship a duck carving.
He needed to fix this. Now.
Shen Mu held up his hands. "Alright, listen up! There is no Dao of the Wooden Duck! It was just a simple carving. You're all overthinking this!"
Silence.
The cultivators exchanged glances.
Then, slowly, one of them nodded.
"…Truly profound."
Shen Mu's eye twitched.
'NO. STOP DOING THIS.'
Another cultivator bowed deeply. "Indeed… Master Shen is teaching us that true wisdom cannot be explained with words!"
Shen Mu's fingers curled into a fist.
Another disciple gasped. "That's right! By telling us there is no Dao… he is showing us the deepest Dao of all!"
Shen Mu wanted to rip his hair out.
A cultivator suddenly fell to his knees, shaking. "I… I've achieved enlightenment…!"
Shen Mu almost fainted on the spot.
Bai Ling, standing nearby, nodded sagely.
"Senior Shen Mu… you continue to astound us."
Shen Mu wanted to scream.
---
Meanwhile, Elsewhere…
Deep within the towering halls of the Blazing Sun Sect, the newly ascended Elder Huo stood before his disciples.
A dozen cultivators knelt before him, waiting eagerly for his words.
He exhaled slowly. His heart was still overwhelmed by the wisdom he had received.
"…The path of cultivation is often filled with obstacles," he began, his voice solemn. "But true enlightenment is found… in the simplest things."
The disciples nodded eagerly.
Elder Huo slowly reached into his robes and pulled out a small wooden duck.
Silence.
The disciples stared.
"Master… is that—?"
Elder Huo's eyes gleamed.
"This," he said reverently, "is an artifact beyond mortal comprehension."
The disciples trembled.
Elder Huo placed the duck gently onto an altar, surrounding it with incense and candles.
The disciples bowed deeply.
"…All hail the Dao of the Wooden Duck."
---
Back at Shen Mu's Workshop…
Shen Mu's soul was leaving his body.
He had spent the last hour trying to convince these lunatics that his duck carving was not divine.
He had failed. Miserably.
Now, several cultivators were meditating in his courtyard, staring at the duck with unblinking eyes.
Bai Ling sat nearby, taking notes. "The more I look at it, the more profound it becomes…"
Shen Mu buried his face in his hands.
"I give up," he muttered. "This world is insane."
At that moment, another knock came from the gate.
Shen Mu's soul nearly left his body.
'No. NO. NO MORE!'
But before he could refuse, the gate slowly creaked open…
And a mysterious figure in a dark robe stepped inside.
The air instantly grew cold.
A sinister aura spread through the courtyard. The cultivators meditating on the duck shivered as an oppressive force filled the space.
Bai Ling stiffened. "Who…?!"
The figure lifted his hood.
Beneath it was a man with blood-red eyes, his aura dark and foreboding.
A demonic cultivator.
Shen Mu groaned.
"…What now?"
The man's lips curled into a smirk.
"So. You're the so-called Grandmaster Shen Mu?"
Shen Mu clenched his fists.
'Nope. I'm done. I'm running away.'
---
End of Chapter 11