Chapter 17: The Princess Chronicles of Saint Mia

There existed a book entitled: The Princess Chronicles of Saint Mia; a self-proclaimed work of nonfiction, its contents were pure and unbridled fabrications that glorified Mia. The author of this work was the renowned writer Elise Littstein, who single-handedly established the fantasy genre in the Tearmoon Empire and pushed it to prominence. Employed as court author through Princess Mia's patronage, she was also sister to Anne Littstein, who served for countless years as the princess's personal maid-in-waiting.

The book began like this.

My first meeting with Her Highness came shortly after my twelfth birthday. At the time, I was a sickly child. Without even the strength to play outside with friends, I could but turn to writing. My stories — not novels, no, for they were far too crude to be called novels — served as an outlet for my desires and frustrations. They were an escape for an impoverished young girl who had little else in her world.

Her Highness performed no more than a quick skim of my scribblings before deciding to employ me as a royal author. Not only that, in those few short moments, she grasped the entirety of my story. I was left speechless by the sheer speed at which she read. It was a gift that defied all sense, bespeaking a brilliance that defied all description. It is my belief that this episode offered an early glimpse at the abundant genius of Her Highness.

Once again, to be absolutely clear, that was only Elise's interpretation. Misinterpretation, rather. In fact, it was straight up delusion, since there wasn't an iota of truth to what she wrote. Regardless, her book sold like hotcakes. In a way, it was perhaps a fitting sign of an empire in decline.

Granted, the book also ends up saving Mia's life... but we'll get to that later.

"Court artist... to Your Highness?"

Caught off guard by Mia's sudden proposal, Elise could manage to do little more than blink.

The system of court artists involved a member of the nobility or royal family becoming a sponsor for an artist and supporting his or her livelihood. Gaining a good sponsor meant freedom from financial worries and the ability to focus completely on one's creative work. It was the kind of mouth-watering proposition that every artist dreamed about.

Having been offered the best job a writer could possibly hope for, Elise shook her head.

"Please, I'd rather not."

"Eh?"

Elise's answer took Mia by surprise. She gave a puzzled frown.

"Why? I do believe it's a proposition you stand to benefit from."

As Mia's court author, she'd have access to the Grand Library in the castle as well. It'd be far easier for her to do research that way...

"I don't want you to favor me just because I'm Anne's sister."

"Elise! Are you out of your mind? How can you say that to the Princess?"

"I want to earn my success as a storyteller, not be gifted the role of a court author through my sister," she said, a hint of indignant anger creeping into her tone.

Mia gave her a level look and said, "My, but I was under the impression that I was recognizing your talent."

"You're lying! There's no way you could have read it that fast!"

"Miss Elise, if there's one thing I'd like you to remember, it's this: I hate lies," said Mia, her voice taking on a firm edge. "I read your story, and I'm making this proposal because I enjoyed it."

Then, she put a finger to her cheek and looked up at the ceiling, as if she was pondering something. A moment later, she spoke again.

"Ah-hah. Why don't I describe for you what I like about your story! Let's see... First, there is..." she said, turning her thoughts to that day in the dungeon when she'd first heard the story. She still remembered all the parts she liked, the scenes that left an impression on her, the things that made her laugh...

And then, she talked. She talked and talked, rattling off a long list of entirely subjective opinions about the story like those smug armchair critics you all surely know well.

"...No way."

Elise's expression gradually changed. At first, it was mild interest. Then, it was genuine surprise. Then astonished wonder. Then... a baffled frown?

"Um, Your Highness...?" she asked timidly during a lull in Mia's encomium.

Mia raised an eyebrow at the perplexed look on Elise's face.

"Hm? Yes?"

"How come... you know about parts that haven't been written yet?"

"...Eh?"

The meaning of Elise's question hit her like a pound of bricks to the head.

Sweet moons! Oh, I just slipped up hard!

She sure did.

The version of the story that Mia knew was from a few years later. Obviously, it contained material past what was currently written.

It felt so terribly good to talk about it that I wasn't thinking at all about what I was saying!

Having realized that she'd made a royal blunder, she broke out in a cold sweat and started to panic. Unexpectedly, however, she was lent a helping hand.

"What's so surprising about that, Elise?" asked Anne, who seemed completely unperturbed. "This is Princess Mia we're talking about, you know? Once she's read a few chapters, she can guess where the story's going to go."

Clearly, Ludwig wasn't the only one who was suffering from terminal Mia Syndrome. Anne was right there with him. In her mind, the significance of Her Highness had inflated to ridiculous proportions. If the weather was nice, it was thanks to Mia. If it rained, then Mia was looking after the farmers and their land. Anne had, in summary, become a true-blue Mia fan.

"Right, Milady Mia?" she asked, beaming at the object of her adoration.

Mia nodded by pure reflex.

"O-Of course! Whatever you said, it's absolutely that!"

Absolutely what?! What in the moons was she even talking about?!

Even Mia could tell Anne's reasoning was nonsense. It was too late to back off now, though. She had to run with it.

"And there you have it," she said, forcibly moving the conversation along. "Now, with that in mind, allow me to ask you again. Elise, I'd like you to become my court author. And when you do, make sure you finish writing this story."

"Your Highness... Anne..."

Elise looked from Mia to her sister. Faced with the pair's absurd logic...

"Thank you so much."

She cracked and gave in.

Thus did the Empire see the birth of yet another rabid Mia fan.