Bear

If only I hadn't been sick that day, if only my mother hadn't forced my 5 year old self out of the bed that summer. I wouldn't be in this situation. To recall it vividly, I had been plagued by a series of fever and chills for a whole week right before the first day of my playschool. Eyes puffy from leaking, runny nose and my fear of new people to season the perfect dish of disaster. That's the only way I can describe how it felt to me, but it could've gone better than what occurred only if it wasn't for that cheeky brat. She waltz in looking around the place like she was looking for a prey— perhaps a puffy eyed kid with a runny nose who was trying to hide behind his power Rangers bag. It was clear she didn't let anyone decide her course of actions from the day one. As the teacher tried to get her to introduce herself, the cheeky brat glanced at me and her eyes lit up with a mischievous glint. I might've been young but I recognised trouble from a mile away, 6 benches away to be exact. Before I could hide any further she pointed in my direction with her index finger "Bear!" she mused and burst into a fit of giggles. That declaration had switched something twisted in the rest of my 5 year old peers. Soon enough nobody rememberd my name, all I could hear was "bear" in every room and hallway I walked into.

To this day I cannot think of any harm I might have caused to someone in my past life to deserve this. Once I reasoned to myself that I banished her from my kingdom as an emperor in my past life and she's now reborn to make sure I can never fit in anywhere. Not even in my own home it seems, the infuriating sound of her voice teases the ends of my ear. She's here. That cheeky brat treats my home like her personal recluse and my precious mother is too nice to deny her. In fact as I tip toe downstairs in an attempt to silently inspect the commotion, mum cheers at something the cheeky brat showed her. Most probably pictures of some stray cat she found on her way here. Her obsession with them never made sense to me. Wandering around aimlessly to try and find food and shelter, just thinking about them sours my mood. In a way she wandered too, aimlessly, to try and find someplace she won't have to run away from. I guess that's why she repulsed me— just like strays do.

As if she had sensors all over her body she perked up at the hint of my presence. My eyes stilled in a glare directed at her, and the Grin on her face increased 10 fold "look who decided to come out of his den~" Courtesy to my mother I couldn't voice my agony externally so I settled for a sigh and walked away again. That didn't change the course of her plans though, like her daily routine she buzzed like a bee close to my ear. Going on and on about something I never paid attention to. Until the clock hit 8 pm, when she stops to leave for her home like clock work. Sometimes she'd stop mid sentence to get up and leave. I didn't bother to ask what compelled her so much, then again even if she had told me the reason I wouldn't remember it anyways.