Nameless Ones (6)

Days and nights changed four or five times.

As I stared blankly at the darkened wilderness, Leonardo tapped my shoulder to signal it was time to switch. I nodded to him and patted the child beside me on the back.

"Hey, little one. Time to sleep."

"Mm…"

Leonardo took the reins from me and moved to the driver's seat. The seat, tattered from being gnawed by the nameless creatures, creaked mournfully. The wagon had become an eyesore over the past few days.

'It's a miracle the wheels haven't broken yet,' I thought to myself, clicking my tongue as I squeezed into the cargo area. Vittorio followed closely behind, and due to the wagon tilting, he fell onto me instead of the floor, landing in my arms.

"Sorry about that," Leonardo said, as he apologized for driving too roughly in the background. With that, I rested my head against the rolled-up blanket.

"We're okay, right, little one?"

"Mm-hmm."

Moments like this, where I can gently pat the child's back with a faint smile, are rare. Since leaving the mountain village, we have faced an unending chase and assault from those creatures. They come in relentless packs, making it hard to find a moment to rest.

On the first day, we only had about five or six after us, but by the second day, it grew to a dozen, and now they keep multiplying. We could only afford to stop when the donkeys were too exhausted to continue. Even when we slept, it was only for brief moments; anything beyond two hours was impossible.

As a result, we have been dividing our limited rest and sleep while moving the wagon. When Leonardo drives, Vittorio and I catch some sleep, and when Vittorio and I hold the reins, Leonardo dozes off. Only Leonardo and Vittorio, the discerners, can sense their presence and prepare for attacks, which is why we've split up the roles.

If Vittorio hadn't been with us, Leonardo, the sole discerner and attacker, wouldn't have been able to even take short naps like this. He would have collapsed from the burden of both detecting and fighting the monsters alone. I'm relieved to have the child here with us.

I quietly watched Vittorio lying next to me and whispered, "Can't sleep?"

On a normal day, the child would quickly fall asleep even with a light nap, but today, his eyes were wide open, unusually alert. Vittorio mumbled softly.

"It's just…"

In the past few days, we had faced surprise attacks—at night, during the day, at all hours.

The moment I noticed the faint anxiety in the child's eyes, it felt like someone had struck me hard on the head. This is what it feels like to be a terrible adult. Would it make the little one uncomfortable if I apologized here?

I looked up at the wagon's ceiling, where the fabric was torn and the deep indigo sky peeked through. I placed my hand on my chest and felt my slowly beating heart beneath my palm, behind my ribs.

I had busy days when I was so preoccupied with counting anxieties that I couldn't close my eyes in the dark of night. There were times when thinking about what lay ahead felt like carrying a heavy stone on my head, making my mind unbearably heavy.

I hoped those days would gradually lessen until I could one day close my eyes and sleep peacefully. A steady job with a regular income, a home that wouldn't abandon me, and trustworthy people I could keep by my side.

As I gradually expanded my stable anchors, I hoped that one day I would become a person firmly grounded in life instead of adrift without direction. I found comfort in the thought that there would come a day when I could completely cast aside the heavy stone from my head.

But in the end, none of those aspirations came to fruition, and time flowed on, teaching me that anxiety would inevitably remain a companion. I began to endure sleepless nights in my own way.

"I have a method I use when I can't sleep at night. Want to hear it?"

Vittorio nodded, pressing his little body against mine, ready to listen.

"Kid, have you ever been to a blacksmith's shop?"

"Yeah. Sometimes I'm asked to run errands there."

"Then you've seen the scene of metal being melted down. You know, putting scraps into the crucible and melting them until they're soft and gooey… Now, close your eyes."

Sometimes, on sleepless nights, I would imagine putting all the thoughts swirling in my mind into that crucible, turning them into lava. The molten thoughts would be poured into an oval mold and allowed to solidify slightly, then taken out before the sizzling mass cooled completely, setting it down on the firm ground of my consciousness.

The remaining process involved watching patiently as that mass melted the ground beneath it and slowly sank down. Worries and anxieties boil so easily, digging deeper and deeper into the abyss, and eventually, they would disappear, hiding somewhere deep in my consciousness.

Of course, the elasticity and pull of thoughts are powerful, and sometimes they surge up like a fish being pulled from the depths, exceeding their depths briefly. When that happens, I would reheat the mass that had been drawn out and bury it into the ground once again.

Slowly, until sleep came.

'It's pathetic that all I can offer is this kind of advice, without being able to reassure him properly.'

I gently tousled Vittorio's hair, and he quietly blinked his eyes.

"…Have there been many nights when you couldn't sleep?"

"I don't think it was that many."

"Can I ask what made you anxious?"

"Hmm."

The things that worry me now feel too insignificant compared to the threats to his life he is experiencing.

'Nameless.'

As the days drag on, there will come a time when I'll have to give up my dreams. But I don't know when that time will be. I don't know how to recognize that moment or how to admit my failures when it arrives. It's a path where stability and financial prosperity aren't guaranteed, yet the moment I say, "I keep going because I enjoy it," I'm expected to naturally possess the passion and effort to surpass others.

As the period of namelessness drags on, I find myself increasingly doubting my enthusiasm.

In an era where the pursuit of dreams and success has become a mythological, almost obligatory task that everyone seems to aspire to, I feel the pressure to chase that obligation myself. Yet, the reality of sleeping aimlessly every day while remaining stagnant weighs heavily on me.

"…I'll tell you later. For now, you should sleep."

With a gentle smile, I pinched Vittorio's cheek lightly, and he finally closed his eyelids and drifted off. The night was alive with stars, wind, and the chirping of field insects, and Leonard's voice floated down through the sounds.

"You should rest too."

"Right, right. I was wondering when you'd say that."

I closed my eyes and allowed myself to imagine in the quiet for the first time in a while. I envisioned scenarios, monsters, and bizarre scenes—damp underground, white and red blood, images of people turning to ash—all thrown into the crucible and ignited into a bright, hot scarlet mass. However, even as the imagined mass slowly sank to the deepest depths of the underground, sleep eluded me.

***

The next morning.

Breakfast was kept as simple as possible. While waiting for Leonardo, who was chewing on bread like a hungry beast, I casually asked, 

"Is it still quiet?"

"Yeah. They keep lurking around and being a nuisance, but it's the first time we've gone half a day without an attack."

Normally, we would have faced an ambush during the night or early morning, but nothing happened. This made us even more uneasy.

Recently, while passing through valleys or fields, we often saw traces of abandoned farms, and the place where we were taking a break now was also an abandoned farm. The increasing number of buildings indicated that we were getting closer to the urban area of El Dante.

Whether the monsters know that their freedom will end the moment Leonardo enters El Dante is uncertain. However, considering that they must have anticipated it would be difficult to launch attacks within human walls, drawing a conclusion is simpler than breathing.

"They're probably preparing to strike hard."

"Seems like it."

"I hate the feeling of being chased~ I'd much rather be the one doing the chasing."

While I was trying to ease the tension with some trivial conversation, I glanced outside the open door. It had been sunny for several days since we left the village, but now the sky was again filled with a grey hue.

"Do you think it will rain?"

Leonardo, who had quickly devoured two pieces of rye bread and a pouch of jerky, also looked outside and replied, "It seems likely."

My prediction was spot on. A few hours after we set off from the farm and re-entered the forest trail along the winding river, the sky suddenly turned overcast, and raindrops began to fall. This rainy season. It might look like it has ended, but there's no sign of the rain clouds retreating.

"We need to be careful."

The ground was slippery with mixed gravel. The river, which we had been following like a guiding star, would swell over time, increasing its current.

As Leonardo wrapped the reins around his hands a couple of times to prevent slipping in the rain, Vittorio and I hurriedly covered the hole-riddled wagon with cloth in preparation for the downpour. The sound of tiny feet scampering over the tarp transformed into a concentrated barrage as the raindrops thickened. I turned to Leonardo and Vittorio.

"What does it feel like to sense them?" 

I knew both of them were the discerners, but I couldn't quite grasp how it worked.

Vittorio pondered for a moment before answering. "It feels like my stomach is churning… It's not a good feeling. It's like being watched by hungry rats in the dark while I'm trying to sleep. And then I start to feel really anxious."

The child placed a hand on his chest and furrowed his brow. Leonardo, keeping his gaze fixed ahead, simply added, "It's unpleasant."

Before his words had fully settled, Leonardo and Vittorio exchanged a look I had never seen before: a clear expression of hostility.

"Below us!"

The wagon lurched violently, and the ground heaved up suddenly.

[Accessing information of the specified entity.]

Role – Nameless Ones

Role – Nameless Ones

Role – Nameless Ones

Role – Nameless Ones

Role – Nameless Ones…