Chapter 1

After waking up from sleep, the first thing I hear is the sound of a loud beeping on my phone indicating a messenger notification.I wonder who is texting me this early morning on a Saturday.Lazily, I drug my phone from the table beside my bed with my eyes closed.

I open my eyes lazily and begin to enter the passcode on my phone.I go directly to my messenger and see a message request. It gets me curious as to who it is from exactly. "I hope it's not George texting me again after two years thinking I would give him another chance."I say more of a whisper to myself.

This just makes me reflect on my failed 'relationship' with George for a few minutes. George was the worst mistake of my life. I shouldn't have dated him in the first place after all the red flags he showed me but no, I wanted to give him room to become a better person.

My knowing George started off from a harmless friend request on Facebook or so I thought. He sent me a friend request and I accepted it almost immediately. He then sent a message to my inbox and we got chatting from there. It was chemistry. By the time we were done chatting that night, I knew that if he asked me to be his girlfriend someday, I would gladly accept. He seemed like a perfect gentleman. As days went by, me and George grew fond of each other and even scheduled a physical meeting because all this while, we had been chatting online as well as making a few calls here and there.

George's comments on some of my pictures before meeting were full of lust than love. He'd say things like "I can't wait to kiss you and go all the way" or he'd suggest that I wear something a bit revealing when we meet in person. He's erotic comments got me having second thoughts about even meeting him physically because I wondered what he'd do when he saw me in person. To make matters worse, we weren't even in a relationship yet. I was torn in between liking him and preserving my dignity at this point.

I kept giving him excuses when he suggested we meet physically until he began to draw back. I noticed it. We were no longer chatting like we used to nor talking often on phone. I decided to confront him about it cause I still liked him. He told me he wanted me to be his girlfriend and that wasn't the first time he mentioned it. He went on to say my excuses each time he suggested we meet up were drawing him back on the possibilities of ever building a relationship with him. I listened intently to all he had to say and we finally settled for a day to meet up.

The day finally came and I dressed up in my favorite pair of dark blue ripped jeans,a pink top, black canvas, added a mini dark blue bag to complement the pair of trousers and did some light makeup. I then tied my black curly hair in a ponytail and looked at myself in the mirror. I loved how I looked and hoped George would be happy to see me.

George and I lived 2 hours away from each other. I suggested we meet at a park instead of his place like he had suggested. I walked to the park as it was not really far from my place. I was there within 30 minutes and walked towards a bench that was under a beautiful umbrella tree not so far from the entrance. I sat down there and sighed while drinking some water in a bottle. A few minutes later, George walked into the park and I waved at him from where I was sitted. I was able to recognize him as he didn't look any different from the the pictures I had seen of him. He walked with great strides and was there within a minute. In person, he was approximately about 5.2 meters tall, with a fair complexion and short hair which was neatly cut. He had a tattoo on his arm of an eagle. He was putting on a black pair of jeans with a gray short sleeved t-shirt. I stood up from the bench and gave him a handshake. "Lily, good to finally meet you in person." I was feeling a little bit nervous. George didn't make it any better as he kept on staring at me while licking his lips and making me feel more uncomfortable. When he noticed I was tensed, he quickly stopped licking his lips and decided to hold my hand while reassuring me that he was going to be well behaved and there was nothing for me to be afraid of. I felt a bit calm and we starting talking about our lives. He told me how he had been looking for a job after he graduated a year earlier which kept looking hopeless. He had a degree in engineering. I encouraged him to continue being optimistic. I also shared my own struggles as a literature student. How the assignments kept coming and I hardly had enough time for myself as I was also doing a part time job. He sympathized with me and before we knew it, we had been talking for close to three hours.

"It's getting late," I said. We have to start leaving as I have an assignment to work on and submit later this evening." "Alright, I understand .Hopefully we can do this some other time" He responded with a faint smile. "Definitely" came my response. George escorted me close to a road that led to my apartment and we said our goodbyes. He behaved like a perfect gentleman.

I got home that evening, feeling super exhausted. A few minutes later, George texted me to tell me he was home. He also told me that I shouldn't delay in my response to his proposal as we have finally met physically ."sure" was my response to his text.

After a few days, I decided to accept George's proposal. He was so happy and asked that I visit him at weekend which I declined because we hadn't set our boundaries in this relationship which was very important for me. He asked why I couldn't visit him and I told him we needed to talk about our expectations in the relationship. We decided to talk that evening after I knocked off from work.

I texted George immediately I got home so that he could call me. Less than five minutes later, my phone rung as I was getting into my pajamas ready to retire to bed. I picked up the call and we asked each other about how our day was spent. "baby, so earlier you said we should talk about our expectations in this relationship right?". "Umm, yes" came my response. He went further to say that for him, the most important thing was for his sexual needs to be met and everything else wasn't a big deal. I was so dumbfounded. I began to sweat despite the window in my bedroom being open. "I…..I….I...…don't think I can do that" I finally told him. "What do you mean, you can't do it, are you a virgin??" "Yes I am and I have vowed to myself not to sleep with any man until marriage." He was quiet for a few minutes then he responded. " I didn't know we still had virgins in this 21st century, well there is always a first time for everything baby." He asked me what my expectations were and I told him I wanted my man to be there for me as I am there for him and also what was most important to me was respecting each other's values and supporting each other's dreams in life. "Really?" was his response.I told him I had class early in the morning and needed to rest and the call came to an end. That night felt like the longest night of my life as I couldn't put myself to sleep after what George said to me. I hadn't yet fallen in love with George because his behavior wasn't giving me peace and now this. "I will give him time to come around. Relationships aren't supposed to be centered on sex.There is more to a relationship than sex." I came to that conclusion.

Three weeks into the relationship and George couldn't stop pestering me about sex in almost every conversation we had. He even called me selfish because I didn't want him to sleep with him. He tried every trick he could to talk me into doing it but I stood my ground. He told me he loved me countless times especially after arguing about me not fulfilling his sexual desires. I knew for a fact that I didn't love him. He was very manipulative. I often wondered how a person who claimed to love me wouldn't support me in my celibacy. I thought with time, he'll come to accept and appreciate this side of me but no. I even suggested that if he couldn't be in a relationship with me because of celibacy, we could end it. He refused and said he could manage. However, when he finally accepted he couldn't be in a relationship with me anymore because of what I stood for. He sent me a text breaking up with me. Instead of being heartbroken, I felt relief. A few days later he texted me asking me to take him back but I refused and that's how it had been until I decided to block him.