The Unjustified Child

Next morning came and as expected, the police knocked at my door. Officer Llweyn and Officer Mark. They introduced themselves and entered my house.

"You were the last person to see Christa alive, right?" Officer Mark asked

"Wait...what happened to her?" I rehearsed this last night after coming home. I acted like I knew her but in contrast to that I didn't even know her name.

"Oh, you don't know? She was found dead in the nearby alleyway near the Brothel" Llweyn said.

"D...dead?" I tried my best to look shocked. But my hands were sweating.

"Yes, dead. What happened between you two? The Brothel owner said you and Christa didn't even enter the building. Where did you take her?" Mark asked. They strongly suspect me. I didn't think they would ask the Brothel owner.

"I cancelled after she said that..." I tried to think of a reason.

"She said what?" Llweyn asked sternly.

"That she won't make out with a man like me no matter how much money I give her—". That's it, that's the best I could think of.

"Really now?" Llweyn raised an eyebrow. He was sceptical.

"Well...she knew my background and didn't want to serve me" I said, making up excuses on the spot.

"Oh yeah, your father. So, she rejected you because of your occultish background?" This time, Mark asked.

"Y...yeah. Then we went out our own direction" I said, trying to end this conversation faster.

Mark couldn't help but burst in laughter.

"A fucking slut rejected you?!" He said while laughing.

"Stop it, you asshole" Llweyn said to Mark, not liking how he is destroying the stiff and serious environment.

"Fine fine, my bad" Mark calmed down.

It was embarassing. Mark is right, it's really embarassing to be rejected by some harlot who can't afford to reject anyone in her entire life. One of the most repulsive creature finding you repulsive is utterly pathetic.

"In addition to that, we found a satanic symbol near that body too. It's very likely that it was done by some occult group" Llweyn said, more like taking to himself.

"And I have no relations like that anymore, I swear!" I said to make sure that I am clear with this.

"We know, we know. We researched your background." Mark said in a laid back tone.

"But remember, we will come back to you if we find any lead" Llweyn said to me, it sounded more like a warning.

"Ok...okay" I said.

They both nodded and left my house. When they completely left, I sat down on a nearby chair and let out a sigh.

I may make out through this.

________________________________________

12:41, the same day

I was walking outside, trying to clear my head. I was very careful not to flock around the Red-light district. I didn't want to remember that. But I couldn't control myself. I entered that gutter...again. My heart raced and I was slowly rubbing my hands with fabric inside my pocket when I entered that area. There was no smell of perfumes that time which made me even more uncomfortable. My head stares hurting so I looked down while bearing with the pain. But a few meters away, I was met with a very unusual sight. A child?

This place is not for children. I have that much sense that this place can even traumatise that poor child. I went to that child, a girl she was. If this child too gets in a bad influence, then she would be doomed.

She looked up at me with fear. She was only 8 or 9 years old. Honestly, I can't help but pity her. But I can't show that and maintained my stern façade.

"Wh...who are you?" She asked in a meek tone.

"I can ask the same question to you. Who are you?" I asked sternly.

"I am Marie" she said quietly. She was obviously nervous but I didn't care less. She needs to get out of this area. I can't let this young girl flock around those women and men.

"And what are you doing here?" I asked

"Nothing...it's really nothing"

I looked at her skeptically. Her body language gave away everything. But there was a sense of familiarity with her.

"That's a straight lie"

"No no, it's absolutely nothing"

"Dare you say that again" I said in an intimidating way. Only this way she can spill the beans. She flinched and looked down. I started to feel bad too at this point.

"Do you know where my mother is?" She asked

I was stunned by her question. Her mother? How the hell is she going to find her mother in this area?

"Give me the real reason" I said

"No, it's real!" She looked up at me after I said that. I could tell she was telling the truth but the truth was weird in itself. Her mother? In this area? No woman with a daughter can opt this profession. But I nonetheless decided to entertain her.

"Who is your mother?" I asked

"Her name is...Christa" she said.

I was stunned by her answer. This was not an answer I was expecting. My eyes widened in a both questioning and skeptical way.

"How does she look?" I asked.

"Thin, brown hairs, bruised arms—" she went on with her rant but as soon as I heard that description, it was like thunder fell upon me.

What are the odds of this? How can I stumble to the daughter of the woman I just murdered? My head was starting to spin. I had nothing for breakfast due to the interrogation and I leaned against a nearby pole.

"Are you okay, mister?" She asked in a concerned tone.

I just waved my hand, gesturing her that I am fine.

Even the idea of marriage haunts me. And she had a child while being working in that line? That's foolishness! This child won't last in society!

I looked at her. She had the same eyes as that of her mother. But they were filled with more innocence. Her mother's eye were scrunched in distrust and a silent desperation.

Now I really question my initial assumption. Was she really weak?

"Do you know where my mother is?" She asked.

I couldn't answer that. Not now. In that moment, I completely forgot that I was supposed to be superior and beyond these affairs. But still. Should I atone to what I did? Is she the reason why that woman wasn't backing down? I hate it. I hate that my mother didn't put up any fight.

I never questioned my deed but now this girl is forcing me to. Whatever I did, was it right? I maybe physically strong but...was I as strong as her to do that kind of job while being a single mother? But this girl is reminding me of my own predicament two years ago.

Was I the weak all along? Here her blood is standing infront of me like a mockery of my actions last night. She is spitting on my very philosophy.

"You must be hungry, right? How about you come with me and I'll tell you where your mother went" I said without thinking much. I myself was kind of shocked but I didn't back down from my words.

"She told me to not go with strangers..." She said in a way tone.

"I am one of her colleague. I'll tell you where she is" I said, trying to hurry so that no one catch us together. She shouldn't be here in a red-light district.

"But..."

"No buts you damn idiot!"

She was taken aback by my outburst. A bit terrified too.

"Hey...listen. This area isn't safe and you have to come with me so that I can tell you where your mother is". I said, trying to calm her down.

"O...okay" she gave in. It was a meek response but I think she was terrified by my outburst.

"Good, come with me" I held her hand gently, assuring her that I mean no harm.

She obediently went along with me...just like her mother. But this time, I really meant no harm.

________________________________________

18:36

My home is isolated from other people. If I remained with them, I would have gone mad. My parents had this small cabin outside town. I brought her with me. A single bed with a worn out couch against the wall opposite to it. An old table with an electric lamp which works but on rare occasions. That occassion was yesterday. With an adjoint kitchen which was small but sufficed.

I was successfully able to distract her with some games and old TV shows. She told me that her mother never let her go outside. She was even home tutored. And I think that's the best course of action.

The increasing crime rate against children, and even adults is very alarming. What if people like my...father get her? That would be a horrific sight.

Not only that but...she is the child of a prostitute. She would be looked down, and even bullied. Hell, nobody likes those women. Hiding her from the worldly eye was the best course of action.

I was in the kitchen trying to make something for dinner. "What do you want to eat?" I asked from the kitchen.

"Anything that you like..." She said from the living room with a low voice. She was watching TV, although there were only ads.

"Don't trust my cooking" I scoffed and continues to make something. Some cooked rice would be fine. It isn't like I have got much else to feed her too.

"Mister?" She called out form the living room.

"What?"

"Why are you taking care of me?"

I remained silent. Am I amusing my ego? That women secretly had a child. It makes me question my deeds. Was I right? No...to avoid that, I can take care of this child. Yes, I am practically showing how capable I am by taking her out of the hell she was living in. But there was another reason that I didn't want to admit. Her touch was soothing.

"Because I can" I said simply.

"You have no reason?"

"I don't"

We both went silent for a good minute.

"You are a odd man" she said in a matter of fact tone.

"What did you say?" I asked in a threatening tone.

"Oh, nothing nothing. Just some personal musing" she said, trying to dismiss my threat with a nervous smile.

"Try to keep your thoughts to yourself" I simply said before getting back to cooking.

I could barely cook initially. But after living alone for two years without any support, I can cook decently. But that's just according to my taste. I don't give a damn if she pukes it out.

'...'

Well, I did pray for that to not happen while cooking in the end.

________________________________________

21:30

I decided to sleep on the couch and let her sleep on the bed. She was just a child and probably tired. So she needed to rest. Yeah, I sometimes also make rational decisions.

And she has opened up too. She is pretty sociable. Perhaps due to her need of forging relations out of her house. It was pretty easy to befriend her. Or she befriended me.

"Say, how did you even reach that place?" I asked.

"What place?"

"Where I found you, obviously"

"I told you earlier, you have Alzheimer or something?" She said. She was becoming more open to me. Even sassy too. The room was dark but I can feel her grinning and trying to stiffle her laugh.

"Mind your tongue" I said in a threatening tone, which she didn't take seriously

"Fine fine..." She said while giggling.

Man, I hate this girl. But even I couldn't help but smile.

"I left the house at dawn" she started. "She usually comes back about 4 or 5 am but that day, she didn't. I was worried so I left the house to find her. Although, she always stopped me but I couldn't help but be concerned."

I listened to her. I lied to her that she got some 'business' related work away from this town. I can't really tell her the whole deal just like that.

I'll slowly tell her the truth. I decided.

"But you still didn't give me the answer to my question" she asked. Her tone was sassy as always but with genuine curiosity too.

"What question?" I asked.

"You really have Alzheimer!" She retorted whole giggling.

"Don't you dare!" I retorted but it lacked any kind of venom. Her innocence was contagious.

She burst into laughter on the bed.

When she calmed down, she continued. "You really don't have any reason?"

I paused, weighting my options before saying—

"I don't have any reason"

We both remained silent in that dark room before she giggled again.

"You are an odd man—"

"I dare you to say that again"

When she calmed down, she continued

"But you are great"

I went silent. I couldn't believe what she said. Am I...great? How?

"You took care of me, for no apparent reason" she paused before continuing,"You are a testimony that God didn't abandon me. And that he still loves me."

I was dumbfounded. What is this young girl saying? No word uttered by her made sense to me.

"You found me by coincidence, right?" She asked.

I simply nodded. That was the only answer I could give.

"Coincidence is the best way to interact with the Divine" she said. "And you were a great coincidence" she said. Her words were so romaticized that I couldn't see what she meant to say.

She giggled. "I learnt this from Sir. Latinus's novel"

But still, how can a girl understand this complex thing? She was no more than 10 years old. "Good night" she said before changing her side.

How does she expect me to sleep peacefully now?

Nonetheless, I closed my eyes.I couldn't sleep and my nerves were still excited. But this excitement was a good one. Perhaps...I have become an extraordinary man.

But this didn't last for long.