The Sanctum

FALL TERM - DAY 12 

It was the night of the new moon. With three moons above, I hadn't noticed when one had gone dark. Though to be fair, I probably could have. It was Luna, the largest of the three. And now this is a thing I know because apparently the Vodalysa coven meets every new moon and full moon of Luna's calendar. It turns out that "coven" wasn't just some kind of honorary title, but a function of the Midnight Court. As you might have guessed, I almost missed the first meeting.

It was a normal evening. I'd spent a few hours after dinner alone in the library trying to get through some of the required reading for Divination. My head was still spinning from flipping between star charts and as it was I could hardly tell you the difference between a trine and a sextile. I'd only dipped out for a moment to grab a coffee from the dining hall when I noticed the odd silence.

The dining hall was a ghost town. 

Normally at this hour, I'd expect a few mages still hanging around, chatting or reading. It was the only place at the Court I knew of that had a kitchen. Instead, there was only Blackclaw scrutinizing a heavily picked over tray of biscotti. We exchanged a strange look, but the gruff war veteran was hard to read on the best of days. 

I tried to remember then if I'd seen anyone since leaving the library, only to realize I hadn't. Where was everyone? I almost said something to Blackclaw but he'd stuffed two biscotti into his mouth when I glanced over at him. It was awkward, so I got my coffee and decided I could figure it out on my own. 

I took a different route on my way back to the library, hoping that I'd see someone I could ask about all of this. I didn't pass anyone in the halls. Whatever was going on, there was no one out. Though there was a light on in one open doorway. 

I poked my head in. 

My sigils class instructor, Professor Kelyn Marblebrook was at the desk, grading papers in the low light. She was a curvy half-elf woman with long silver hair she wore pulled up into a messy bun. Tonight, she wore red-framed glasses and a loose-knit sweater. A steaming mug of tea at her side was enough to conjure up quiet peace that I was very much then intruding on. 

"Hey Professor Marblebrook." 

She looked up. "Oh, Zephyr! Come in. Didn't realize you'd been waiting. And please, it's Kelyn. I was never one for formality. It gets too confusing with all the Marblebrook and Marblebrook. And besides, it suits Elandria better." I'd gotten so used to seeing Kelyn Marblebrook for sigils class, sometimes I forgot her wife was technically my coven leader, Mistress Elandria Marblebrook. 

"Speaking of, I'd bet she's looking for you about now…" Kelyn said. 

I picked up a throw blanket on one of the chairs across from her and set it aside to take a seat. "Am I missing something?" 

Kelyn chuckled lightly. She cast something in a flurry. Her violet painted nails flashed in the low light. "Elandriaaa! I've got your guy here. Any chance you're missing one of your flock?" 

I'd heard mages could cast quick messages like that across distances, but until now I had yet to see anyone do it. Was it really that simple? Kelyn cocked her head, ear raised to listen for something I couldn't hear. "Yeah, yeah. I figured as much."

She turned back to me. "Elandria will be over in a few. She's just a little behind schedule." 

"For what exactly?" 

Kelyn bopped her head, considering. "I think she'd say it's a surprise." Though she was grinning in a way that made me think this was likely the kind of surprise that was more fun for her than it was for me. 

There was a moment of quiet and then Kelyn glanced back down at her desk and returned to her work. I fidgeted in my seat. I was still holding a cup of coffee from the dining hall and no longer knew what to do with it. 

"You know, Elandria always kept photos of you from your mother. You were such a little thing. Hard to believe you're all grown up already." 

I didn't really know what to say. My mother was the type to keep secrets. There wasn't a polite way to say I didn't know anything about her friendship with Elandria Marblebrook. But I also didn't know she'd kept in touch with anyone from outside of Caburh. 

So, I sipped my coffee. 

Then, Marblebrook - Elandria Marblebrook - arrived. She was a tall woman in dark heeled boots. She had a stern expression, a sharp-edged jaw, and a long neat braid running down her back. She'd been the one to meet me at the wharf the day I arrived in Mesym. Even then, I recognized her immediately. She had the same tight-lipped poise my mother had. This was exactly the kind of woman she would have trusted. 

And like my mother too, she was matter-of-fact. We'd spent an afternoon when I first arrived together and not once did I get the impression that she was glad I was one of the new mages to join her coven. She wasn't bitter, only serious. Not that I'd minded. I was still worn from the trip and more than a little wary of what I'd just done. Leaving the Stag's Court. Leaving Ianthe.

"Oh, you didn't have to drag the rest of them, Elle!" Kelyn said. Just behind Marblebrook came Noodle, panting hard, and Aries just behind him. Aries was pale. A few strands of his blond hair looked wet where they clung against his forehead. "That one's looking a little green." 

"It's only intradimensional travel, Kelyn. They'll be fine. They'll have to get used to it tonight anyway." 

"Make sure to give them plenty of water," Kelyn called out just as Marblebrook set her hand on my shoulder and Kelyn's office fell away. 

I was ripped through a portal, like being disassembled and reassembled in a single instant. The feeling didn't hurt exactly, but it did make my insides go cold and quiver. We were no longer in Kelyn's cozy tower office, but instead a stone, windowless room lit by faint glowing sigils across the floor. 

The cup of coffee I'd been holding, I was still somehow holding. A few drops had sloshed over the rim and onto my hand, but otherwise, it was relatively unphased. The same could not be said for Noodle and Aries. Aries slumped forward, crashing first into Noodle. Noodle yelped. "No, no, no. You're too heavy, Aries!" 

I managed to help catch Aries before he completely took Noodle down. My coffee splashed on the stone floor. 

"Another fainter," Marblebrook muttered. She'd managed to deftly step out of the way of all of this - even the spilled coffee. "Help him up. It always hits worse when your body isn't used to magic. I'll get him some water. You'll get ten minutes to catch your breath and then we'll have to get started." 

"Start what exactly?" I asked. Aries was on the floor blinking up at me. His fall had brought me to my knees. Noodle was on the ground too, still breathing hard and prising tufts of his long gold hair out from under Aries. I can only imagine how the three of us looked to Marblebrook.

"Our coven meeting," she said. "And we're late." She turned down a dark passage and out of sight. The sharp click of her boots on the stone floor was the only sign of where she'd gone. 

"It's a good thing you're tall. I could have hurt myself falling on your horns." Aries wasn't fully with it, but at least he was talking. But then again, when wasn't he talking? It was a good sign. But also, he was woozy from magic, not blood loss. Plenty of people fainted at the Stag's Court, and even then, most still lived.

"You hurt yourself plenty falling on Noodle," I said. My coffee mug was empty so I set it down on the floor and used both hands to heave him up. Aries was solid, and certainly heavier than he looked. My eyes adjusted to the low light enough to make out a tasseled ottoman, so I crashed him down there. 

I had a strange feeling that we were somewhere underground. Maybe under the Court. There were no windows and under all the incense, perhaps a hint of musk, or maybe standing water? 

"Did she say I fainted because I'm bad at magic?" 

"She only said that your body's not used to it. She didn't say you were bad at magic." Even if it was true. Marblebrook was specific with her words, but I wasn't sure what the difference was. 

Aries sighed and put his head in his hands. He rocked forward just enough that I worried he was about to collapse again.

"Hey, look me in the eye," I said, lowering myself down to eye level. "Just for a second."

His eyes shot up. They gleamed with the low light of the sigils on the floor. For a second, he looked incredibly vulnerable. But I couldn't focus on that right now. I followed his eyes. Tried to make sure he could hold his focus. 

He was watching me intently. "Weren't you going say something?" His voice cracked. I noticed even as he tried to hide it with a cough. 

I blinked. I didn't know what he wanted me to say. "Like what?"

"You asked me to look at you!" 

"I was checking your eyes. You're going to be fine. I didn't think you hit your head on the way down, but better still to check."

"Oh." He looked down at his sweater. The cream cable knit pullover probably got more of my coffee than the floor had. But Aries didn't mention it. 

Marblebrook returned right about then with a silver goblet and passed it to me. I held it to Aries and watched him slowly sip. It was an overly ornate chalice that glowed violet in the dark purple light. Something told me that wherever we were, this wasn't some place mages regularly needed to go find a glass for water. 

"So, now that you're all feeling better, let's get on with it. Welcome to the Sanctum." 

Marblebrook went on, "As Vodalysa mages, you'll be required to join us for every new moon and full moon in Luna's calendar at eight in the evening for a coven meeting. It should be easy enough to remember - all the covens do something. Luna has a particularly strong tie to magic and is good to work with in ritual casting. We'll probably wait until the next new moon though to try anything given the way tonight went."

"Are we in a dungeon?" Noodle asked. 

Marblebrook snorted. "Of course not! I mean, there's no door. No windows. All the stonework… It's not a dungeon. You may come and go anytime you'd like once you learn how. Which actually, is what we'll be working on tonight.

"I don't know if you've noticed yet, but not every class has much in the way of spells. Your classes alone won't teach everything. This is where your coven matters most. Covens keep their own grimoires. Here, you'll have access to new spells and will have to come together to further your education. At some point, it'll be up to you to start crafting grimoires of your own, with the spells that have worked for you and spells collected both from here and from other mages you've met and collaborated with. And maybe one day you'll want your grimoire donated back to the Midnight Court where it'll join the rest of the Vodalysa collection."

So, this was where we learned how to use magic. What was even the point of all the classes then? I wanted to ask, but a quiet voice in the back of my head reminded me that I chose these classes and most of them I kind of even liked. I won't be taking Divination next term, but the rest? There was plenty still I wanted to learn here. 

"And you'll be learning your first Vodalysa spell tonight - it's called shadow step. It's the only way you can come and go from the Sanctum on your own. So you'll learn it tonight, practice it, and once you're able to do it on your own, you can move on to using our beginner's grimoire." 

Marblebrook took a few minutes to explain exactly how the spell worked, assuring us all that it was much easier physically when you cast it yourself than it is when relying on another caster. She said too, it's much easier to cast it in the dark, hence the low lighting. The next time she cast it, I got a much better sense of what it was. I watched the darkest shadows of the room lengthen and wrap themselves around her until she vanished and reappeared on the other side of the room. 

"You have to learn to lean into the shadows. Let them take you to where you want to go. Don't resist," Marblebrook said. She slowly walked us through the casting gestures a few times over.

I mimed her movements to the best of my abilities until suddenly I felt the dark of the room slip over me and block out my vision. 

"That was it, Zephyr," she said. "Next time, focus on where you want to go." 

It took more than a few attempts to even get that far again. Noodle, too, was showing some progress. Aries, to no one's surprise, was mostly just going through the motions. This time, I didn't blame him. The first time I was able to shadow step across the room, I felt my stomach lurch and choked back a mouthful of bile. 

Noodle wasn't feeling great either - he'd taken up Aries's water goblet, lapping up what little was left, and leaving a line of drool down one of its sides.

At some point, Marblebrook crossed the room and set a hand on Aries's shoulder. "There's no need to force yourself to get it tonight. It's why you're a part of a coven. You'll have each other to lean on. If you still haven't gotten it by the full moon, ask someone to bring you along. There's more to being a mage than just casting spells."

I know Marblebrook had meant for that to be reassuring, but when Aries glanced over at me, I felt only a hard pang of something like pity. He forced a smile. 

When we followed Marblebrook through the winding chamber of the Sanctum, he muttered, "You might be waiting awhile for that duel, Zeph." 

"If the alternative is you biting me the minute your spell fails, then yeah, I'll wait," I said, thinking a joke might lighten the mood. But it didn't. 

We were meeting the rest of the coven – or rather, they were meeting us. Marblebrook explained it as we walked through dark passageways. "One of our favorite Court traditions is a ball held at the end of term - the Masquerade. You'll have a mask made for it. You'll wear it the first time the night of the ball, and then for every coven meeting that follows after. With time, you'll know each other even if disguised. Until then, they'll be getting to know you without a mask."

The dark halls opened up into a well-lit space with high ceilings. Three hearths with soft green flames burned at three corners of the room. The walls were lined with bookshelves. The ceiling instead of stone, was ornately decorated with painted glass, not open to sky - it couldn't have been given the hour, but backlit, by some unseen lightsource. Low-backed violet couches and plush purple ottomans filled the rest of the space. 

The rest of the coven was waiting. It was a smaller group than I'd expected. Maybe only two dozen mages? Even still, there were whispers. 

"Are there really only three this year?"

"There were nine last year. You can't expect to always have a class that size…" 

And then, their masks - each distinct and ornate. There wasn't any kind of distinguishable theme or link between the masks, only that they seemed to be made by the same deft artisan. There was a hare with long leather ears, an autumnal leaf, a black swan with a long pointed beak, a swirling nebula with metallic bursts of starlight at her temples. When Marblebrook joined them, she slipped on her own mask - a coiled red serpent wound across the upper half of her face. And then, the meeting began. 

There is nothing I can say of the meeting or our rituals. Only that Noodle, Aries, and I are still too new to magic to really do anything meaningful. It's clear enough that we'll be expected to watch more than participate for most of this term, and likely next as well. 

The meeting concluded with Marblebrook sending a few upperclassmen to help the three of us shadow step back to our dormitories for the night. It was late, and I was thoroughly exhausted from the exertion of trying to learn shadow step, but I held off on leaving the Sanctum just yet. 

I knew it was late, but I was sure that come morning, I'd overthink it and never ask. "Marblebrook, do you have a moment? There was something about Orendell -"

Marblebrook hushed me. "There are some things best kept between you and me. We can discuss this in private."

There was no warning this time either. Marblebrook took my wrist and the room went dark. 

I know I yelped because she laughed. My coven leader was laughing at me. But suddenly we were in a cluttered office, definitely above ground, standing just before a wide picture window looking out over the sea. 

"I know it's terrible at first. But I do mean it when I say you'll adjust. The rest of the coven doesn't feel it. You just need to get your sea legs. Or shadow legs, if you will." It wasn't an apology, but Marblebrook also didn't seem to be the type to offer one without cause. 

"Is that what Aries needs?" I asked. 

Marblebrook sighed. "Him more than most. Kelyn's going to be pissed when she hears he fainted. She always thinks I'm too hard on students. But that's not why you're here. You wanted to talk about Orendell." 

I did. And I didn't. It was going to sound ridiculous. "I still don't remember it all exactly. Making the deal. What I agreed to."

"I hear that's normal. Just know that whatever it was, at some point you agreed to it. Whoever you were at the time of the deal thought it was worth taking." 

"Should that be reassuring?" 

Marblebrook raised an eyebrow. "In your case, probably not. What's he done now?"

"Can he make me misremember things? Change my memory? That kind of thing?"

"It doesn't sound like the kind of thing Orendell would do. What happened?"

"It's going to sound ridiculous, but I studied the wrong lesson for Blackclaw's class. I was certain it was correct. I spent days trying to teach myself conjured frost only to learn we're still weeks away from learning any attack spells." 

Marblebrook paused. It was late, and I was tired. I'd been expecting her to wave me off. Agree that I was worried over nothing, but no. Instead, she said, "Orendell's impatient. I don't know how exactly he would have done that, but I can believe it. Can he speak to you?"

I shook my head. If he had a voice I don't remember ever hearing it. "He's not unintelligent, but he's a lot more wolf than person." 

"He started out as a mage, so that's not surprising. It was a curse that made him the first werewolf. If you talk to him, he'll understand. If he's listening. He's a deity, he might not be." 

I shut my eyes and saw the snickering canine face glaring back at me. "I don't know if it's him, but I can see a wolf in my mind. He's there more often than he's not." 

"That's not Orendell, Zephyr," she said. "You're one of his chosen. He's had many. A thing like him doesn't focus so closely on the day to day of a person like you. It might sound callous, but it's the truth." 

I wanted to believe her. We were still standing in the dark of her office, in front of the window, high enough above the ocean that there were no waves, only a flat dark expanse under the light of the two remaining moons. 

"My best guess - if you think Orendell's behind it, assume he is. The wolf you're seeing wouldn't be him, but I wouldn't put it past him if your deal came with a few clauses. Keep an eye on those. Orendell isn't exactly known for his kindness."

There was more I wanted to ask. More we could have discussed. But it was already late. We were both tired. It was hard to spell out what I really wanted to know. It came down to this – I already had Ianthe's dreamwalking to contend with, would Orendell be another monster in my head? It was a stupid question. 

But I had my answer. 

He already was.