Episode 50: Self-Watering, Lullaby-Singing Plant

The bell above the shop door jingled gently, and a petite woman shuffled in, holding what could only be described as a withered stick pretending to be a plant.

"Help," she pleaded, voice low and desperate. "I'm a plant killer."

Zira squinted at the sad green twig. "That's not a plant. That's a botanical crime scene."

The woman sighed. "I tried everything — sunlight, shade, singing to it, even apologizing after I forgot to water it for a week. Nothing works. I need… a self-watering plant. And maybe one that sings to itself because my voice sounds like a goose being mugged."

Felix raised an eyebrow. "A self-watering, singing plant? That's… ambitious."

The woman clasped her hands. "Please. I just want one plant in my house that doesn't die out of spite."

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Two Haphazard Incantations and a Questionable Amount of Plant-Based Puns Later…

Felix stood proudly beside a small, leafy green sprout in a clay pot. The leaves were a vibrant green, and the soil looked perfectly moist without being muddy.

Zira poked it. "Looks healthy. Too healthy. Did you over-enchant it again?"

Felix waved her off. "Nah, just added a mild growth charm, an auto-watering enchantment, and a tiny sprinkle of personality to make it more 'supportive.'"

Zira tilted her head. "Supportive… how?"

Before Felix could answer, the plant perked up and swayed gently. Then, in a soft, melodic voice, it started humming a lullaby.

The woman gasped. "It's beautiful!"

The plant's voice transitioned smoothly from a hum to gentle singing:

"Grow, little sprout, strong and green,

Watered and happy, calm and serene…"

Zira blinked. "Huh. It's… kind of nice."

Felix nodded smugly. "Told you."

The plant paused its song and tilted a leaf toward the woman. In a cheerful, chipper tone, it said:

"Water? Never heard of her. I handle myself, thanks!"

The woman clapped in delight. "It talks too? This is amazing!"

The plant gave a friendly rustle. "Oh, I do more than talk. I'm a self-care expert. Sunshine? Got it. Water? Already done. Emotional support? Leaf it to me!"

Zira groaned. "You gave it sarcasm, didn't you?"

Felix grinned. "Might've slipped a bit in there."

The woman looked thrilled. "This is perfect. My home won't feel so… empty now."

The plant wiggled proudly. "Don't worry, lady. You'll never feel alone again. I'll be right here, photosynthesizing and vibing."

Zira snorted. "Yeah. Until she invites someone over, and they realize her houseplant's sassier than they are."

The woman gently hugged the pot. "Thank you. This is the best thing ever."

The plant patted her arm with a leaf. "You're welcome, Bestie. Now go live your life. I'll stay here, thriving."

As she left, beaming, the plant started humming again — this time a catchy, upbeat tune that suspiciously sounded like a parody of "Eye of the Tiger."

Zira leaned on the counter. "You realize that thing's going to get cockier over time, right?"

Felix shrugged. "Hey, as long as it waters itself, mission accomplished."