Prologue: 

In the heart of Tacloban City, a place where the sun bathes the streets in a perpetual golden glow and the scent of saltwater lingers in the air, lives a character straight out of a whimsical storybook. His name? Carlos Francesco DiFaustini, though everyone in this vibrant Filipino city knew him simply as Kaloy. Picture a man, a hopeless romantic to the core, with Italian-American roots, finding himself on an island thousands of miles away from the cobbled streets of his ancestral homeland.

Allow me to introduce Kaloy, the protagonist of our tale, the eternal dreamer in a world often too focused on pragmatism. Born amidst the hustle and bustle of New York City, Kaloy's origins were Italian, but his heart, oh, his heart was a globetrotter's. From an early age, he had been enchanted by the grand narratives of love, not just the Hollywood versions, but the kind that unfolded in the real world, complete with its quirks, stumbles, and soaring highs.

Kaloy was endearing in his eccentricities. He sported a perpetually disheveled mop of curly hair that seemed to have a mind of its own, often making him the target of playful banter from his friends and colleagues. His wardrobe consisted of a curious mix of vintage Italian suits, thrift-store Hawaiian shirts, and flip-flops that he stubbornly insisted on wearing even during torrential downpours. His sunglasses were a constant fixture, a stylish shield against the relentless sun.

Now, picture him plucked from the city that never sleeps and transplanted into the charming cityscape of Tacloban, where life moved to its own rhythm. Here, the streets teemed with vendors hawking fresh mangoes, and the sea whispered tales of distant shores. Yet, amidst this picturesque backdrop, Kaloy clung fiercely to his romantic ideals, believing that somewhere in the world, his true love was waiting, ready to be discovered.

But beyond his professional ambitions, Kaloy was a hopeless romantic. He was a firm believer in serendipity, destiny, and all the things that made love the most bewildering and enchanting force in the universe. He often joked that he had an "impotent" ability to attract love, not because he lacked the desire, but because his heart had a penchant for getting entangled in the most absurd and comedic of circumstances.

Tacloban was a city of serendipity, where the ordinary often unfolded in the most extraordinary ways. And in this new world, Kaloy led a dual life. On one hand, he was a part-time motorbike sales agent, navigating the labyrinthine alleys of Tacloban's streets on two wheels, and on the other, a diligent student at Don Jose Botana University, where he was studying Global Marketing.

Let's delve into his life as a part-time motorbike sales agent, shall we? Kaloy was, in essence, a modern-day troubadour, weaving through the city's thoroughfares with an air of showmanship. His sales pitches were a blend of charm, wit, and just the right touch of humor. He could turn even the most skeptical customers into gleeful bike owners, all while delivering the pitch with a captivating flourish. But beneath the veneer of the salesman lay a heart yearning for something far more profound than the commission from a successful sale.

Now, let's venture into his life as a student at Don Jose Botana University, a place where he pursued a degree in Global Marketing. Kaloy was an earnest student, but his studies were often interspersed with daydreams of epic romances. In the hallowed halls of academia, he was known for his creative approach to marketing concepts and his tendency to infuse lectures with anecdotes about love and human connection.

But this story is not just about a man leading two lives; it's also about the extraordinary encounters that would soon grace his path. It's about the moment he met Angelina Gracenford, a British Filipina who would become the star in his constellation of destiny. It's about the whimsical friendships he forged with Mikael Demitrio and Juan Ricardo, the inseparable duo of comedic companions who would question his every decision with both jest and genuine concern.

So, dear reader, fasten your seatbelts, for you are about to embark on a journey through the enchanting, bewildering, and heartwarming chronicles of Kaloy, Angelina, and their unforgettable adventures through the often unpredictable landscape of love, life, and laughter. It's a story that will make you smile, make you ponder, and perhaps even make you question the cosmic sense of humor that weaves its threads through our lives. Welcome to "The Kaloy Impotency."