Entry 5: Our First Date

I had my date with Preston tonight. Honestly, I couldn't tell you how it went because I still don't know myself. I just don't know! It's so hard to assess the night properly because I can't read his mind. He's a man of few words.

It all started after the football game.

Leah and I bolted to her car so that I wouldn't be late meeting Preston. But of course, the one person I hate more than anything just had to get in my way.

"Where's the fire?" Drake asked sarcastically as we ran into him.

He tried to block our way to the exit like a troll trying to make us pay a toll to cross a bridge. He is sooo irritating!

"Move, asshole."

"I don't think I like that new pet name very much..." he feigned sadness in a sarcastic way.

I hated the way he messed with me. I wanted to punch his smug face but Leah practically did that herself with words alone.

"Move Drake, Parker has a date to get to!"

Drake's stupid smirk dropped from his face so fast, I nearly felt inclined to pick it up for him. He looked at me and it was almost like he was hurt. His feelings were actually hurt! Just when I thought Drake couldn't surprise me any more, he goes and shows that there is a small piece of humanity within him. I wanted to crush it.

"No way," he scoffed after he pulled himself together "With who? No one would bother with a washed up skank like you."

I was just about to speak up when Leah cut me off.

"For your information, she has to be at a club with PRESTON DUNN in about 10 minutes! So excuse us! We're leaving!"

Leah grabbed my arm and dragged me away. I couldn't help but let a small devious smile form on my face as I looked back at Drake. He was left dumbfounded, holding his football helmet, watching me run off to go on a date with another guy. It feels like karmic justice.

Now he knows how it feels. I had to see him with Elizabeth so now he can wonder all night about what I was up to with Preston.

The whole way to the club, Leah drove like a crazy person! I'm surprised I made it there alive. I was in the back getting tossed around like a rodeo clown as I tried desperately to change out of my cheerleading uniform and into my date night outfit. I put on a blush pink mini dress, white strappy heels and pulled on a fluffy white jacket. My hair still looked good and I put minimum effort into cheering so that my make up wouldn't sweat off. I simply blotted any oils off my face and reapplied some powder along with my usual mascara and lip gloss.

"You look so cute!" Leah gushed.

She pulled into the alley where we parked the last time we went to The Basement. I assured her I would be okay walking the block alone and that Preston was meeting me in the back to sneak me in.

I could feel my nerves going crazy as I got closer. This had to go perfectly or I would let Preston slip right through my fingers. I saw him standing outside, smoking a cigarette as he waited for me. I sped up my walk and approached him with a smile.

"I'm here!" I announced my presence.

Now I don't know why I did that but it was probably the most uncool way to approach him.

Preston just nodded his head unimpressed.

"I see," he said, blowing the smoke to the side of his face. "I can't believe you actually came..."

His tone seemed very questionable. I couldn't tell if he was happy I was there or annoyed. He was just so monotonous.

"Why wouldn't I?" I asked.

He just shrugged, giving me absolutely no answer and waved me over.

"Come on," he said, flicking his cigarette behind the dumpster.

I followed him in through the door that he had propped open with a folding chair. We were backstage just like the first night I was there. Only this time he was leading me someplace else. We walked down a small flight of stairs and he pulled me to a table in the crowd.

"We only have like 5 more songs to perform after this intermission. After that, we can leave. Just stay here and don't move."

He was very adamant that I not move at all. I had no intentions of disobeying as I sat in the sea of adults. I was just praying that the big scary security guard guy wasn't working and recognized me.

My worries melted away as Preston and his band took the stage. When they played, I was totally enthralled in everything Preston did. And oh my god, don't even get me started on when he would sing. In a perfect world, he would sing me to sleep every single night. I nearly made an audio recording of it on my phone.

Here is where things took a wrong turn. Between school, cheerleading practice, warm ups, the game and trying to get to the club on time, I hadn't gone to the bathroom in hours. At that very moment my bladder decided to betray me. I had to go and I had to go right then and there!

The only thing Preston told me to do was stay put. That was it! And I didn't listen. I snuck away for only a moment and relieved myself in the bathroom. Only, when I came back out, I was spotted. A security guard came up to me and asked for ID. The only identification I had in my wallet was the one that said I was 17 years old. I felt compelled to show it to him and for whatever reason thought he would overlook my birthday. The one thing he was looking for.

Without hesitation, the man grabbed my arm and escorted me out. He also gave me a very stern lecture about trying to act older than I was and asking me what my parents thought I was doing. In all the commotion, not once did I think to mention Preston or that I was there with the band. I just let the guy throw me out into the cold.

I walked around the building hoping and praying that Preston's car was unlocked but of course it wasn't. I almost jiggled the car handle to make the alarm go off but I didn't want to ruin Preston's set. Instead, I shimmied my coat up my shoulders, and shivered in the night wearing a mini dress and heels.

I know, how stupid.

I waited for what seemed like anywhere between 40 minutes to an hour before Preston came out the back door.

"Parker?" He asked as if he was confused to see me.

"Yes?" I chittered out.

"You're still here? I thought you left or something."

"Nope...I just moved."

He sighed and shook his head.

"They busted you, huh?"

Preston unlocked the car door and ushered me inside. He got into the driver's seat and turned the heat on.

"Jesus, you must be freezing. Why didn't you just go home?"

I couldn't help but glare at him. Was he serious? Go home?

"I wanted to hangout with you." I said as I was still shivering.

"Seriously?"

He seemed almost freaked out. Not flattered. Not grateful. Just always confused. Despite how annoyed I was with him not understanding how I felt about him, he still looked totally dreamy when he put one hand on the steering wheel and began to drive.

He asked me if I was hungry to which I replied YES. I was starving in fact. Preston took me to the diner since it was the only thing that was open. Besides his tedious personality, the guy was a perfect gentleman. He opened my car door and any other door for me, he helped me in and out of my seats and pulled my chair out for me at the club. Drake never did anything like that for me and we dated for nearly two years.

When we finally got to the diner, we were in real lighting for the first time. Being in the bright light of the restaurant was refreshing. I liked sitting across from him in the booth and looking at his face. I tried hard not to stare but he caught me a couple times. He never said anything though. He would just look away.

"Why did you want to come out with me?"

Were the first words that were spoken since we had sat down. I thought carefully about my answer before being totally honest with him.

"I just wanted to have fun with a good looking guy. I haven't been out with any guy since my break up last year."

Preston leaned forward, intrigued.

"You dated that Whittaker kid. Was it a messy break up?"

I couldn't help the twisted look that took to my face when he asked that. He didn't know!? He didn't know what I had done that nearly ruined my life for all eternity!? I had to tell him, right? If I didn't, he'd only find out from someone else and they would take away my chance to defend myself.

Just as I was about to lay it all out there, our waitress spawned out of nowhere.

"Do you two know what you want?"

I looked at Preston who gave me an approving nod.

"Order whatever you want. It's on me."

I smiled as I skimmed the menu quickly and recited my order.

"I'll have a stack of French toast with extra cinnamon and a side of powdered sugar and no syrup. I'll also take a side of hash browns, a side of bacon, a side of sausage, a fruit cup and a large apple juice."

When I looked up from the menu, Preston looked disoriented. Like he couldn't believe I would eat that much.

"Sorry," I chuckled lightly, "I didn't eat all day because we had a game. I wanted to be light for stunts."

"What are you, like 90lbs."

"105 actually. But if you ask my bases they'd probably swear I was heavier."

"Jesus, you're tiny."

I frowned and looked down because of the way he said it. It wasn't like a good thing. Maybe he didn't mean it as a bad thing either. I wouldn't fucking know because the boy never changed the inflection in his voice!

"I'll just take a coffee." He ordered and the waitress walked away.

"What were we talking about?" He asked.

"I'm tiny..." I reiterated annoyed.

"No before that. Oh yeah, you and Whittaker. Why you broke up."

I was miraculously fine with talking about my small figure again.

"You really don't know?"

Preston shrugged, waiting for me to spill the details. I could barely say it above a whisper. I was so totally embarrassed. I couldn't even look him in the eyes as the words left my mouth. I just slunk back in my seat and fiddled with my fingers under the table.

"Well, I uh- I sent Drake naked pictures of myself...and he...he sent them to his football group chat. Then the football players sent them to just about everyone else they knew and in about 12 hours they had circulated around the entire school..."

When I tell you the silence that loomed over our table after I finished talking was enough to make me want to die. I mean it. It was the first time I had really sat there and thought thoroughly about what had happened. I think I would've cried if Preston hadn't spoken up.

"What the fuck...."

"I understand if you don't want to stay. I can call Leah to come pick me up and you can just go home. I probably wouldn't want to be seen out in public with me either if I was you. I won't be mad. Why would you want to be seen with the girl that the whole school has seen naked?"

I was panicking. The words spilled out of me like vomit but I meant every single one. He only surprised me again when he said,

"Not the whole school."

I cocked my head to the side like a dog hearing a high pitched noise.

"I never saw those pictures."

"Really?" I asked.

"Really." He shrugged. "And it's nobody's business who I hangout with."

I was incredibly grateful for his reaction. He didn't just drop me after hearing the truth. He actually seemed to feel sympathetically towards me.

"Why, though?" He asked a moment later

"Why what?"

"Why did you send nudes to him?"

I sighed before going in for the long winded answer that followed.

"He always wanted to have sex. Like all the time and I didn't want to. I don't know why, I just didn't. He kept saying that I didn't love him and if I really loved him, I would at least send him some pictures. So.... I did. I just didn't want to lose him. I don't think I ever really loved him. He was right about that. I don't know why I did something so desperate to pretend that I did. And in the end, I broke up with him anyway."

Preston's face never changed. It was like he was just trying to process what I was saying.

"Drake is a dick. The rest of those football guys are just horny idiots. Don't let them give you any shit."

I shrugged my shoulders because it was easier said than done. Especially when you're around those guys as a cheerleader. They're like gnats flying around, always buzzing in your ear and never going away.

I gave Preston a small smile and we watched as our order was placed on the table in front of us.

I wish I could tell you that more happened but it didn't. Hanging out with Preston barely culminated in anything. I didn't learn anything about him. I still hadn't gotten his phone number. He didn't even kiss me or pull any type of move. The "date" was basically me getting kicked out of the club and telling him about how my nudes went locally viral last year. He definitely is never going to hang out with me ever again...