EX Chapter 3: Ayanokoji's Proposal 3

I—Ayanokouji Kiyotaka—was thinking. 

Up until now, I had made numerous proposals to Hikigaya. It started with aphrodisiacs, then high-sensitivity glasses, and most recently, even picking up girls. Through these, I gained new knowledge, and I found it all quite entertaining. 

And in the process, I realized something. No, to be precise, observing Hikigaya made me realize it. 

The decisive moment was the recent attempt at picking up girls. Seeing Hikigaya surrounded by first-year students Nanase and Amasawa, I felt something indescribable. 

In the end, what I'm trying to say is— 

—Hikigaya's love conflicts are the most entertaining thing ever. 

There aren't many things I find amusing. For some reason, watching Hikigaya flustered and toyed with in his relationships with girls—I wanted to see more of that. 

To put my plan into action immediately, I gathered some accomplices. 

"Heh, not bad, Ayanokouji. You've come up with somethin' pretty interestin'. I ain't thrilled about teamin' up with you, but I'm in for this one." 

"Ohhh? You wanna see Hikigaya in a messy love situation? Damn, that sounds hilarious. Of course I'm in." 

The ones I recruited were Ryuuen, from Hikigaya's class, and Hashimoto from Class A. The reason I chose them? Their nasty personalities and their love for mischief. They had both in spades. 

"So, what's the plan? You got the two of us here, but no concrete idea, huh?" 

"I've got a good one. How about we take turns throwing Hikigaya into one mess after another? More variety that way." 

"Ohh, that does sound fun." 

Hashimoto agreed with Ryuuen's proposal, a wicked grin on his face. Seems like picking these two as accomplices was the right call. 

"Alright, let's go with that. So, who's going first?" 

"Guess I'll take the lead, then." 

Surprisingly, Hashimoto volunteered to go first. Must be pretty confident. 

"Heh, you sure you can handle it, Hashimoto?" 

"Don't underestimate me. I've been reporting Hikigaya's girl troubles to Sakayanami-senpai on a daily basis." 

In other words, he's a professional when it comes to screwing Hikigaya over. This might actually be worth looking forward to.

.......

The morning classes ended, and lunch break began. 

Apparently, Hiyori had made me a bento today, so I immediately headed out of the classroom. For some reason, I felt like Ryuuen was smirking at me, but it must've been my imagination. 

After stopping by the vending machine to grab a drink, I hurried to the meeting spot with Hiyori. It was a quiet place behind the school building where not many people went. 

"Hmm?" 

When I arrived, I heard two voices talking. One was Hiyori's, but the other was… 

"Hey, Shiina-senpai. I've got plans to eat lunch with senpai here today, so could you, like, back off?" 

"T-That's my line! I'm the one who made plans with Hachiman-kun today!" 

The two arguing seemed to be Hiyori and Amasawa. Why was Amasawa even here? 

"Ahh, senpaaai! Listen to this~! Shiina-senpai's being so annoyiiing~!" 

"That's you! Hachiman-kun, please say something!" 

Amasawa looked exasperated, while Hiyori didn't even try to hide her frustration. What the hell happened here? For now, I decided to hear them out. 

"...So, Amasawa, you're saying I invited you to lunch here?" 

"Yeah~! Senpai said you really wanted to eat the bento I made, so here I am~ ♡" 

She looked at me with passionate eyes. 

After listening to both of them, it seemed Amasawa had been invited here by me. But… I don't remember inviting her. 

"Wait a minute. I was the one who invited Hachiman-kun this morning. …Unless…?" 

Hiyori gave me a look that seemed to ask, Did you actually invite Amasawa? So I quickly shook my head to deny it. 

"Nah, I don't know either. I was originally invited by Hiyori to come here. I don't remember contacting Amasawa at all." 

"Ehh? But look, I got a message from you right here?" 

Amasawa turned her phone screen toward me. The sender was definitely my contact info, but… 

"Ichika, want to spend lunch together today? I really want to eat the bento you made. Even if that's not possible, I just want to be with you. I want to be close to you, Ichika." 

What the hell is this cheesy message? No way I'd send something like this. 

"Senpaaai~ ♡ I feel the same way~ ♡" 

With a lovesick expression, Amasawa hugged me tightly from the front. Her eyes were half-lidded and dreamy, and she slowly closed them as she leaned in. 

"N-No way!!" 

Seeing me frozen, Hiyori quickly shoved her hand between us, blocking Amasawa's approaching lips. 

"Shiina-senpai, could you read the room? Senpai and I were having a moment here. You ruined it." 

While I was relieved, Amasawa glared at Hiyori and spoke in a dark tone. 

"I don't care about your 'moment.' Besides, there's no way Hachiman-kun would send a message like that!" 

"On that point, I agree with Hiyori. I didn't send that message." 

"Eh? But it's right here?" 

A message I supposedly never sent was received. If this were a horror story, it'd be ghost-related, but I doubt spirits would bother with something like this. There must be another reason. 

"...Amasawa, when did you get that message?" 

"Hmm, around 7:30 this morning?" 

That was around the time I was heading to school. If I recall, the people I met this morning were… 

"...I know who did this." 

"Eh? So you really didn't send it?" 

"Yeah. Do you really think I'd send something that cringy?" 

"I thought senpai was just feeling lonely and messaged me~" 

Amasawa slumped her shoulders in disappointment. Hiyori, watching this, let out a sigh of relief. 

I'd like to say the matter was settled, but… Amasawa smirked, wrapped her arms around mine, and pulled me down onto the bench. 

"Well~ Either way, I still get to eat lunch with senpai, so it's fine~ Look, I brought a big bento because I thought you'd eat a lot!" 

She pulled out a large bento box from her bag. Even though I didn't invite her, I couldn't help but feel grateful she went through the trouble. 

"Muuu, I thought it'd just be me and Hachiman-kun…" 

Grumbling, Hiyori sat down next to me and took out her own bento. Both of them handed theirs to me at the same time. 

"Well, despite everything, thanks to both of you. Let's eat." 

"Of course~ ♡" 

"Please eat a lot!" 

Opening both bentos, I saw Hiyori's usual colorful assortment of Japanese dishes, while Amasawa's was… 

"Whoa, this is impressive. Fried food, salad… a bit of everything." 

Packed with things a high school boy would love—fried chicken, karaage—but also balanced with salads and even fruit. A dream bento for any guy. 

"I figured boys like fried food and stuff. So, senpai, how is it?" 

"Fried food's always great. Especially this karaage—looks delicious." 

I picked up a piece with my chopsticks and took a bite. 

"H-How is it?" 

While chewing, I noticed Amasawa fidgeting nervously, watching for my reaction. It was a rare sight—she usually acted so confident, but now she seemed almost shy. 

"It's good. You're a great cook, Amasawa." 

"Ehehe~ I actually got kinda nervous when you ate it. I was worried it might not taste good." 

"Didn't think you got nervous." 

"Senpai, are you making fun of me? …Of course I get nervous too." 

Seems like I misspoke. Amasawa pouted and turned away. 

"My bad. I really appreciate it, so forgive me." 

I patted her head. She once said I could do it anytime, so she probably wouldn't brush me off. 

Sure enough, Amasawa closed her eyes, looking happy. 

"...Hachiman-kun, should I start prioritizing fried food in my bentos too?" 

Hiyori, who had been listening, tugged at my sleeve with a slightly worried expression. …I must've made her anxious. 

"Don't worry. Your bentos are always great. Just getting to eat them regularly makes me happy." 

That was the truth. Her bentos were high-quality and delicious. Just having them often was a blessing. 

"If you say so… But if there's anything specific you'd like, please tell me, okay?" 

"Yeah, I'll let you know. …Oh." 

"Senpai, want a veggie stick?" 

This time, Amasawa tugged at my sleeve, redirecting my attention. She was holding out a cucumber stick with a smile. 

"Nah, I'm good…" 

"You do want it, right~? Of course you do." 

"I really don't—" 

"Hmm~?" 

"...Yeah, I want it." 

Well, it's not like I had a choice. 

When I agreed, Amasawa placed the cucumber stick in my mouth. Honestly, I don't get why she's so insistent, but I might as well eat it quickly. 

Just as I thought that— 

*Chomp.* 

"Wha—!?" 

Amasawa bit the other end of the cucumber. Hiyori let out a shocked gasp. 

"Senpaaai~ Tasty~?" 

Her cheeks relaxed, she stared into my eyes as she asked. But how was I supposed to keep eating like this? 

Still, staying like this forever wasn't an option. What should I do…? 

Then, Amasawa slowly started chewing. *Crunch, crunch.* The distance between us steadily shrank. 

"Senpaaaai~ ♡ I wuv you~ ♡" 

With a lovesick expression, she whispered sweetly, closing the last few centimeters between us. But— 

*—Snap.* 

Just before the distance hit zero, the cucumber's durability gave out first. 

"T-That's a relief…" 

Well, it was a relief, but I couldn't say I wasn't a little disappointed… 

"...Hachiman-kun? Are you… disappointed it didn't happen with Amasawa-san?" 

"...No way." 

"Then why the pause?" 

Hiyori leaned in, interrogating me, but since I couldn't deny it, I could only avert my eyes. 

"Aww, we were so close~! Wanna try again, senpai~? ♡" 

"N-No way! If anyone's doing it, it's me!" 

"Too bad~ These veggie sticks are mine~" 

The two of them bickered loudly. 

Watching the chaos unfold, I focused on my bento, doing my best not to make eye contact with either of them.

.......

"Huh, that turned out pretty interesting." 

"That bastard's got that enlightened look on his face. Heh heh… I can't stop laughing." 

"It went a little differently than expected, but it was pretty good, wasn't it?" 

We watched Hikigaya and the others from the school building as we shared our thoughts. 

"Well, I enjoyed it. What about you, Ryuuen?" 

"Decent. If I had to score it, maybe 60 points." 

"Damn, harsh. And we've been setting this up since this morning, you know?" 

Apparently, Hashimoto had waited for Hikigaya on his way to school, pretended it was a coincidence, and walked with him. During that time, he must have used Hikigaya's phone to message Amasawa. He also seemed to have found out about Shiina's plans. 

"I thought that first-year, Amasawa or whatever, was way more into Hikigaya. Didn't expect her to be so reserved." 

"You're just too soft. I'll go next. I'll show you what a real mess looks like." 

If Ryuuen's going second, that leaves me for last. 

Ryuuen's got the worst personality out of all of us. Whatever he's planning should be entertaining.

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