Shattered

Chapter 20

Tina's POV

As I climbed the stairs toward my apartment, each step felt like dragging a boulder uphill. The weight of broken dreams and shattered hopes pressed down on me, making it hard to breathe, let alone think. The tears I'd been holding back threatened to spill, and I struggled to choke down a sob, wiping away a stray tear before Joe could notice.

Once inside, I made a beeline for my bedroom. The familiar surroundings felt like the only safe haven from the storm brewing inside me. I collapsed onto the bed, burying my face in my hands as the pain of betrayal and disappointment pulsed through me, relentlessly and sharply.

"Why did I even bother?" I whispered to the emptiness around me, my voice barely audible. "I should've known he'd never see me the way I see him. All that effort just to feel like an outsider at that stupid pool party... watching him stare at her the whole time like I wasn't even there."

My mind replayed our conversation from days earlier, a cruel reminder of his empty promises. "I'm not seeing anyone else, and I'm starting to have real feelings for you," he had said, looking me in the eyes as if I were the only girl in the world. I'd clung to those words like a lifeline, believing he meant them. But tonight, it was Tamara he couldn't take his eyes off, not me.

On the way to Justine's party, I'd finally mustered the courage to ask him if he was serious about us. He had looked at me, calm and sincere, and said he was. And yet, when I watched him with Tamara tonight, I saw none of that devotion. Just longing-for her. My heart twisted painfully, and a fresh wave of doubt washed over me.

But when I confronted him, he brushed it off with the same tired excuse: "Tamara is my childhood friend. I have to look out for her. If anything happened to her, I'd never forgive myself. I owe that much to her family."

I scoffed aloud, a bitter laugh escaping me despite the ache in my chest. "Is she a child or something? She's a grown woman! She doesn't need a personal bodyguard following her every move."

The image of Joe's gaze lingering on her as she strutted around in her blue bikini resurfaced, making my heart sting anew. Every glance, every smile he'd thrown her way felt like a fresh wound, like he'd left me out in the cold while he basked in the warmth of her attention.

"Maybe I'm just not good enough," I whispered, the words spilling out like a confession. "Not for him... maybe not for anyone."

Doubt and insecurity crept in, amplifying my pain. I scrutinized myself, every flaw, every imperfection, replaying moments when I'd fallen short, convincing myself that Tamara-or anyone else, really-would always be the one he chose. "Why did I even wait so long to tell him? All I've done is set myself up for heartbreak."

As the silence grew heavier around me, a small, fragile voice inside whispered words I'd nearly forgotten. Words my mother had told me over the years, echoing her strength and kindness. I remembered her resilience, the way she'd sacrificed her own dreams for our family. Mom had been a talented chef once, the best at a five-star hotel. But when Dad asked her to stay home and take care of us, she'd given up her career without complaint. She plastered on a smile even when she was clearly drowning in boredom and loneliness.

But Mom had found her own way to cope. I'd introduced her to K-dramas, and now she laughed and sighed over Korean actors like a giddy teenager. The thought of her fangirling brought a faint smile to my face. "Typical Mom," I murmured, feeling a pang of longing.

Dad loved her in his own quiet way, meeting her every need, yet their relationship always felt... distant. He was reliable, but never romantic. Even as a child, I'd sensed Mom's loneliness. I realized, with a pang, that I was feeling that same loneliness now, aching for someone who would never fully see me.

Tonight, I needed someone to talk to. Someone who wouldn't judge or tell me to "just get over it." I picked up my phone, dialing Mom's number, hoping she would answer. But after a few rings, the call went to voicemail. She was probably busy.

I tried Trisha next, hoping my best friend might be free, but she texted back immediately: Busy. Chat later? I didn't even bother reaching out to Veronica. She'd be at work, and I didn't want to feel more alone by hearing another "no."

A hollow laugh escaped me as I dropped the phone beside me on the bed. "Guess I'm really on my own tonight."

The thought stung, but I forced myself to face it. I was no stranger to solitude, to picking up the pieces on my own. "Maybe that's for the best," I muttered, even as tears stung my eyes again. "I wasn't falling for him. This was just... an experiment. Just fun."

But even as I tried to convince myself, I felt a pang of betrayal deep inside. Who was I kidding? I'd been falling for Joe, bit by bit, allowing myself to imagine something more between us. And tonight, he'd shattered that illusion. Maybe it was better to realize it now before my heart was completely in his hands.

A faint determination sparked within me, like the first rays of dawn piercing the night. I wiped my eyes, forcing my shoulders back and lifting my head. "I won't let him-or anyone else-make me feel like I'm not enough. I'm stronger than this."

With each breath, I felt a new resolve build within me. I wasn't defined by his lies or my own self-doubt. I was worthy of love, not just from someone else but from myself. As the minutes ticked by, the ache in my chest slowly faded, leaving behind the steady beat of my own resilient heart.

In the silence of my room, I made a quiet vow to myself: I would pick up the pieces, learn from this, and start anew. Joe might not have seen my worth, but I did. And that was enough to carry me forward.

Joe's POV

The night was a total disaster. Everything I'd planned unraveled like some horrible comedy. Nothing went the way I'd envisioned. Not one single thing. All I wanted was a chance to show Tina how I truly felt, but somehow, in the chaos, the night slipped right out of my hands.

Things started off well enough. On the way to Justin's, Tina asked if I was serious about her, and I didn't hesitate. I confessed that I was starting to really fall for her and was excited about where this could go. I could tell she was holding her breath, and the moment I told her, "I think I'm falling in love with you," she admitted she felt the same way. That car ride was magical, her hand in mine, and for the first time, I thought I was finally getting things right.

But then...Tamara happened.

I've known Tamara my whole life. I know how stubborn she can be when she sets her mind to something, especially if that "something" is me. But last night, she went beyond her usual. It was like she was performing just to get my attention, dragging Justin along like some pawn. And I fell right into it, didn't I? I'm supposed to be with Tina, but I'm spending half my time trying to make sure Tamara doesn't do something reckless with Justin, who, knowing him, won't hesitate to move on to the next girl by tonight.

Tina saw it. I could feel her growing jealousy as I kept glancing over at Tamara. She thought I was checking her out, that I was...interested. And maybe, in some way, I was. I wanted to make sure she didn't pull something that would have the whole party in shambles. But Tina didn't know that, did she? I could tell she felt like my attention was split, and I don't blame her. She's the one I love, but Tamara's the one I've been close to since we were kids, and I owe her that. Or at least, I used to think I did.

Now I need to fix the mess I made. Why is it that just when I manage to clear up one misunderstanding, another one pops up?

To top it off, Calvin's flight landed an hour ago. I called Herbert to take over the counter and headed straight for the airport to pick him up. Seeing him felt like finding a lifeline. As soon as he spotted me, we hugged, both laughing like idiots. It felt like a release I didn't even realize I needed.

"You doing okay, man?" Calvin asked, pulling back to look at me with that knowing smirk of his.

"Yeah, yeah...fine." I lied. Not well, either.

"Sure," he snorted. "Now, spill the beans."

I sighed. "Let's find somewhere cool to talk; it's hot as hell out here."

We drove to the nearest pub and ordered a couple of cold beers. Calvin raised his glass, and I clinked mine against it, forcing a smile.

"So?" he prodded as he took a sip.

"It's...Tamara," I muttered, taking a gulp of beer as if it would drown the mess in my head.

Calvin's eyebrows shot up. "What about her? Are you two dating or something? What happened with Tina?"

"It's not like that. It's...complicated."

He rolled his eyes. "When isn't it? Alright, I'm all ears."

I took a deep breath, feeling the weight of last night come crashing back as I told him everything. Tina, the pool party, Tamara's antics, and the way I'd messed things up with Tina.

When I finally stopped, Calvin let out a long sigh. "Man, have you even checked on Tina? She's probably devastated."

"I tried calling and texting her, but she hasn't responded," I said, running a hand through my hair. "I don't know what else to do."

He grinned and gave me a gentle slap on the back. "Simple. Get the prettiest bouquet you can find, buy her something sweet-maybe her favorite pastry or whatever and show up at her door. Girls love that stuff, trust me. It'll show her you care."

I felt a sliver of hope. "You think that'll work?"

"Hundred percent," he nodded, smirking. "Who knows? You might get lucky and score some dessert yourself tonight." He winked, clearly entertained by the mess I'd created.

I laughed, shaking my head. "You're unbelievable."

"Hey, that's why you keep me around," he said with a shrug. "Now, let's finish these beers, and then you get going. I've got my own plans tonight anyway."

Typical Calvin. Always on the move. We polished off our drinks, and after one last reassuring pat on the back, he sent me off on my little mission.

As I walked to my car, my stomach twisted. Flowers and a gift..I could do that. But would it be enough to get Tina to forgive me? There was only one way to find out.

Veronica's POV

"Veronica, come on! We're really busy. We need you up front!" one of the staff called from the entrance of the store.

"Be right there!" I yelled back, trying to keep the frustration out of my voice. I glanced down at my phone. My younger sister was still on the other end, quietly sobbing.

"Look, don't worry," I said softly, though the words felt hollow even to me. "Just... take care of Mama, okay? I'll call as soon as my shift's over."

I hung up, feeling a heavy ache settle into my chest. I wanted to stay on the line, to hear more, to be there for them, but the constant chatter and buzz of customers were relentless. I tucked my phone into my pocket, took a deep breath, and forced a smile before heading back out to the floor. The summer crowd filled every inch of the shop, as if the whole city decided today was the day they needed swimsuits. Why can't people just wear last year's suit? Why does it have to be a new one every time?

I gritted my teeth as I approached a customer. She was impatiently rifling through the rack, flipping bikinis over and over, frowning.

"I can't find my size anywhere!" she snapped, tossing a perfectly good piece aside.

"You're holding your size," I said, trying to keep my voice steady. "Maybe try it on? I'm sure it'll fit perfectly."

She gave me a look, as if I'd just suggested she wear a burlap sack. "I need a size smaller," she huffed, "it makes my waist look better."

Go on a keto diet, I wanted to mutter. Instead, I swallowed the words and fetched the ridiculous size she wanted. She flashed me a satisfied smile and waltzed out with her purchase. It took all my strength not to roll my eyes.

As I watched her leave, I tried to calm my racing thoughts. Mom's sick. Really sick. I thought of her, frail and tired, probably laying in bed right now with my sister hovering over her. I should be there with them. But here I am, helping people pick swimsuits they don't even need.

Another group bustled in, filling the space with chatter and laughter, dragging me back to reality. I sighed, plastered on a polite smile, and braced myself for round two.

After a long, sweaty shift, I finally clocked out. But I couldn't relax. I had a second shift waiting at the cinema. Just enough time to breathe, I told myself. I found a quiet corner outside the store, leaned back against the wall, and pulled out my phone, dialing my sister's number. No answer. She's probably busy with Mom, I reassured myself, but I couldn't shake the growing anxiety. I left a quick message, hoping she'd call me back soon.

Then, a notification pinged. I opened it to find a new group message. Joe added you to Summer Vacation Group Chat. I clicked in, feeling a twinge of curiosity. Calvin was hosting a summer party at some villa, and almost everyone had already voted to go. Everyone except me and... Tina?

Tina? Why hasn't she voted yet? I wondered if she was caught up with family too, or maybe something was holding her back, just like me.

Not that I could go anyway. I barely had enough for rent, let alone a vacation. And besides, crowded places made my skin crawl. Just imagining a noisy party, crammed with people laughing, dancing, and not a single space to breathe, made my stomach twist. But a break would be nice, a chance to forget everything for one night...

I shook my head. No. First, I had to check on Mom.

I dialed Dad's number, holding my breath as it rang. He picked up, his voice low and weary.

"Dad, what's going on? Is... Mama okay?"

A long silence. My heartbeat drummed louder, each second filling me with dread.

"She's... not doing well," he said finally. "The doctors... they're doing what they can."

My head felt heavy, and a sinking feeling spread through me, cold and sharp. "Is... is she going to be okay?" My voice was barely a whisper, my throat tight with the weight of fear.

"I don't know, Mija" His voice cracked, and I could picture him, trying to stay strong for me, for my sister, for Mom. "But she's fighting."

I leaned against the wall, gripping my phone so tightly my knuckles turned white. The world felt like it was spinning out of control, and I had no way to stop it. I wanted to scream, to cry, but all I could do was stand there, numb.

I should be there. I should be with her. What if... what if I don't get another chance?

The tears I'd been holding back blurred my vision, and I quickly wiped them away. No. I couldn't break down. Not here. Not now.

I took a shaky breath, willing the heaviness in my chest to ease. Mom needed me to stay strong. I needed to keep going, to keep working, to keep pretending everything was fine.

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"Sometimes, the hardest part isn't falling for someone, but realizing they never felt the same way."