"The Roast Duck Report."
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"Genius! Bureaucratic nonsense exposed—just two colons and BAM, it's all there!"
"Kyle, oh Kyle, what's going on in that brain of yours? Using something small to hint at something big—brilliant!"
Nick couldn't help but applaud Kyle and Mia.
Not because the sketch was laugh-out-loud hilarious, but because the idea behind it was clever.
That kind of sharp thinking—like using a stamp or a boat ticket in Nostalgia—using tiny objects to represent something so much bigger.
"Damn, the way he reads it… totally has our director's style!"
"He just reads straight from the script! He even reads out 'applause here' and 'see next page' like a robot! Totally clueless~"
"Colons? HAHAHA! Only someone who's dealt with this kind of idiotic leadership would get that joke!"
Many viewers watching on their phones or TVs smiled knowingly.
Meanwhile, on stage, Kyle and Mia kept the show rolling.
Kyle stuck out his belly, holding a cigarette between his fingers, still using that thick countryside accent:
"In order~ to solve the people's~ belly oil~ problem~"
Mia widened her eyes:
"Wait, what? You're just saying it like that?"
Kyle looked a little flustered:
"Is that phrasing~ not appropriate?"
Mia burst out laughing:
"Nah, not inappropriate—it's just total nonsense!"
Kyle frowned slightly:
"Don't rush! There's always a reason!"
Mia smirked:
"Oh really? Can't wait to hear the kind of crap you'll make up this time~"
Kyle straightened up:
"You like roast duck, right?"
Mia nodded:
"Of course! Love it~"
Kyle smacked his lips, eyes shining with hunger:
"Roast duck… that golden crispy skin, juicy and sizzling when you bite into it—mmm, slurp~"
Mia gave his chin a playful nudge, like he was actually drooling:
"You're seriously worse than me, just drooling over roast duck~"
The two bounced lines back and forth, their goofy act making the audience roar with laughter.
Kyle swallowed a few times, as if troubled:
"We Chinese people love roast duck~"
Mia proudly added:
"What do you mean Chinese people? Foreigners love it too! It's world famous!"
Kyle raised his eyebrows in surprise:
"Foreigners love roast duck too? What a coincidence!"
Mia nodded:
"Totally! Even the president of the U.S. came to eat it~"
Kyle lit up, putting his hands on his hips:
"Aha! So this roast duck… involves a world peace issue~"
Mia blinked:
"World peace? You mean sharing the duck with foreigners?"
Kyle puffed up, pretending to hold a pen and write:
"This is how we write the report~"
Mia asked:
"How's it go?"
Kyle nodded dramatically:
"Leader COLON!"
"Pfft! Dude, even when rewriting the report, you're still using that colon—Kyle, you're seriously something~"
The audience who hadn't quite caught on before now burst out laughing—Kyle's "colon joke" came full circle and hit them again.
Nick got it now—Kyle was training the audience.
If you repeat a punchline once, people start anticipating the next one.
Humans are social creatures—we like recognizing patterns and feeling "in on the joke."
Just like when someone starts singing Ah ah ah—Fifth Ring~, you know someone's gonna follow with One ring more than the Fourth~
In both traditional comic dialogue and stand-up, you often find this kind of shared laugh.
It may not be the fanciest kind of humor, but it connects the performer with the audience.
That connection is everything. When the audience shares the laugh, the performance belongs to them, too.
In music, this connection is everywhere. In comedy—rare.
But right now, Kyle's routine was hitting that sweet spot.
Nick, being classically trained in theater, picked up on it immediately. He didn't just know it worked—he knew why it worked. Way above your average street performer.
"Hahaha! Colon~ What even is this?"
Lily clapped and laughed, while Matt sat stiff-faced, thinking darkly:
"What kind of cheap, corny routine is this? How many punchlines has he done so far? I could blow him out of the water with one random bit."
Mia rolled her eyes, pretending to be annoyed:
"At least he's got the colon line down by heart~"
Kyle, all warm and kind-faced, declared:
"In order~ to promote unity among all mankind, and~ to safeguard world peace—we urgently need to eat some roast duck!"
Mia grabbed him:
"What? What's roast duck got to do with world peace?!"
Kyle explained:
"The duck~ symbolizes peace!"
Mia squinted suspiciously:
"How does a duck represent peace?"
Kyle sighed:
"Comrade, where's your political insight?"
Kyle:
"Every time there's a big national celebration at Tiananmen Square, you see flapping, fluttering birds—ducks everywhere~ uh, wait, no—those are doves~"
"HAHAHA! Ducks flying over Tiananmen?! You're wild!"
The crowd broke into applause, laughing freely and loudly.
Mia shook her head:
"What kind of low-level official is this? Doesn't even know basic stuff~"
Kyle sighed:
"Who needs common sense to be a leader anyway? But writing this roast duck report—that's the real challenge~"
Mia laughed:
"So even he's stuck! Guess we're not eating it after all~"
Kyle smacked his lips again, still hungry:
"Don't panic! There's always a reason. Wait—isn't the holiday coming up?"
Mia shot him a look:
"All you think about is food and time off? The calendar says it's Thursday!"
Kyle flipped through the calendar:
"Ah, it is Thursday… Big day: Pavlov's 150th birthday?"
Mia peeked over, surprised:
"No way, it really is Pavlov's Day?"
Kyle's eyes gleamed with an idea:
"Perfect! We'll eat the duck for him today! Hahahaha~"
His drooling face and ridiculous excuse made the audience chuckle in anticipation—what's the next excuse gonna be?
Mia looked skeptical:
"Eat him? He's been dead for years. You gonna dig him up?"
Kyle looked offended:
"What are you saying? Pavlov's theory—conditioned reflexes! Ever heard of that?"
Mia was surprised:
"Wait, you know about that?"
Kyle proudly puffed up, thick accent and all:
"Of course! He experimented on dogs to make them drool~"
Mia shook her head:
"Okay, you do know a little something."
Kyle smacked his lips, grinning:
"Every time I see roast duck—drool! I'm practically a Pavlovian dog at this point!"
"Pfft! He just called himself a dog from Pavlov's experiment—this guy's fearless!"
Frank, watching TV, burst out laughing right then. He'd long thought of his boss as a dog anyway.
But, like they say in that thief sketch—you don't have to like it, but you have to accept it.
Mia shook her head:
"Now you've got everyone drooling—Pavlov must be smiling down from heaven!"
Kyle grinned:
"Got it! The report will say~"
Mia asked:
"What's it say?"
Kyle puffed up again:
"Leader!"
Mia and the audience shouted in unison:
"COLON!"
"HAHAHAHAHA! Clap clap clap clap clap!"
Laughter and applause erupted—everyone was shouting "colon" with joy! The vibe was electric!
"....."