CONFESSION UNDER THE STARS

TEMI:

Sunlight trickled in under the blinds, casting wan shadows in my room. I struggled to open my eyes, the heaviness of the stuff of last night's dreams—snatches of remembrance, echoes of laughter, and lingering heat from Ola's hand. How life had unraveled and rolled out to drive us apart again to converge again in tow. And yet how long this time?

Shaking the images out of my mind, I hauled myself out of bed and into the bathroom. The hot water poured over my body, washing the remnants of sleep from my skin, but did little to wash the discomfort creeping into my chest. Something was. amiss. Or maybe it was merely my heart still reeling in the chaos of emotions last night.

Wearing a plain beige blouse and blue jeans, I rushed downstairs, grabbing a rapid breakfast before heading out into the cool morning air where my vehicle was parked. My hands drummed impatiently on the car door as we hit the main road. The city was bustling as ever, but there was something in the air that seemed electric, agitated. The traffic was awful, a solid block of honking vehicles and angry drivers.

Half an hour passed, and we did not budge. My irritation mounted until I spoke to the driver. "What's the matter?"

He sighed and shook his head. "Heard there's a mutated beast up ahead. Someone is fighting it."

My heart missed a beat. "Someone?" I repeated, but worst was immediately brought to mind—Ola. With no more hesitation, I yanked open the car door, over the driver's objections, and off I went. My pulse hammered in my ears as I threaded between the standing cars, eager to get to the location. The nearer I got, the nearer the noises of destruction loomed—roaring, cracking concrete, crackling battle power.

But when I reached the front, my breath stopped. It wasn't Ola.

The man standing in the center of the chaos, staring down the hellish beast, was someone else. Tall, dark-skinned, his physique a reflection of brute strength and power. Kareem. Just saying his name carried weight. He had emerged as the symbol of the awakened—no, the mages. A rising star, a guardian, a symbol of strength. His abilities were horrendously beautiful, his control over atoms distorting reality itself. I was frozen in place as he killed the monster with quickness, breaking it down to its very core.

"He's impressive," a voice whispered at my back.

I spun around, my heart thudding in my chest. Ola stood there, hands pocketed in the sides of his white baggy sweatshirt, dark blue jeans completing his typical laid-back style. His eyes flicked to the fight, and then back to me, a faint twitch of his lips.

"Is he your type?" he asked, tilting his head very slightly, amusement dancing in his eyes.

I punched his stomach playfully. "Definitely not."

His laughter was gentle, and close to a music, and we fell in pace beside him. We walked about the city, falling back into old patterns. He showed me an amusement park, and we went for a ride on the Ferris wheel, height that made my stomach flip over, but Ola just chuckled at my protesting. At the arcade, he tried—and lost—at a claw machine, and I laughed so hard my stomach hurt. We dined at a small cafe, the scent of char hanging in the air over our low conversations of nothing and everything.

It was as if it were normal for an interval. As if the previous year had not been. But when night came, reality's weight settled back upon my shoulders.

Ola escorted me home, his gait even by my side. The air between us grew thick with unspoken words, the sort that churned within your chest, against your ribcage until you couldn't hold them in anymore.

I lagged behind, extending my hand before I realized it, curling around the hem of his hoodie. He stood still, turning to face me.

"Something wrong?" His tone was gentle, wary.

I gulped hard, my eyes staring at the pavement. "I…" The words hung in my throat, muddled with fright and longing. "I've always loved you, Ola," I admitted, my tone on the edge of a whisper. "But I didn't know how much until you were taken away. Until I couldn't reach you, couldn't hear your voice for a whole year."

Silence.

A silence so heavy it pressed against my chest, stealing my breath. Then, warmth. Ola pulled me into his arms, holding me close. His heartbeat was steady against my ear, but he said nothing for a long moment. When he finally spoke, his voice was laced with something that sent a pang through my heart.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

I had gathered the fabric of his hoodie, the sting of his words searing deeper than I expected. But before I could let the hurt wash over me, he backed up enough to catch my eye.

"I've loved you for a long time, Temi." His fingers brushed away the tears that were streaming down my face. "But it's not safe to be with me. I don't want you caught up in the world I'm in. At any moment, I could be sent to fight, to battle enemies who would have no hesitation in using the people I love against me. I could die, Temi. And that...that would destroy you."

I wanted to protest, to tell him that I could handle it, that I'd rather favor the danger with him than be left behind. But deep down, I understood.

But the pain of it seethed inside me.

"I understand," I whispered, even though my voice betrayed the hurt that I was feeling.

He smiled gently, a small sad smile, and leaned forward to place a soft kiss on my forehead before moving away. "Goodnight, Temi."

I turned away before my tears could betray me again, shoving my feet in front of me until I was in my home. The moment my door closed behind me, I collapsed on my bed, hiding my face in my pillow as the tears flowed freely.

The following morning, my body was heavy, my heart heavier. But I forced myself up, going through the motions—shower, dress, go outside. The sun was blazing, oblivious to the storm raging inside me.

----

At the hospital, I found Ola's mother with his father, her face soft but tired. She smiled when I entered.

"Where are Joshua and Ola?" I demanded, though already I knew I wouldn't like the answer.

Her smile wavering slightly. "They left very early today."

The words struck more than they should. A quiet pain lodged in my chest, but I pushed it down, nodded as if I understood.

"I hope they will be safe," I mumbled.

Because that was all I could do—hope.

Even if it hurt.