CHAPTER 22

The Moon's Shadow (Waiting)

The air felt different.

A small change that I could feel deep inside my bones.

The moon was getting bigger, I could sense it.

Every day that passed made me feel more scared.

The quiet changes inside me were getting louder.

I couldn't sleep well anymore.

The nights felt restless like something bad was going to happen.

I would move around a lot on my bed of branches, always seeing that frozen tear in my mind.

The marks on the cave wall reminded me that I wasn't the only one having a bad dream.

Being scared of the thing that made those marks mixed with being scared of changing myself.

It felt like I couldn't breathe.

I tried to fight it.

I thought if I got really tired, it would help.

I ran far in the frozen forest and chopped wood with a sharp rock until my arms hurt.

But the restless feeling inside me just stayed there.

I also tried to control my mind.

I tried to think of calm things – Elara's smile, the warm sun – anything to make the scary feeling go away.

But the beast was like a shadow in my thoughts, getting bigger all the time.

The worst part was feeling like I couldn't control myself.

It felt like someone else was pulling the strings of my body.

My own thoughts felt like they were going away, and something wild was taking over.

The moon was now half-full in the night sky.

Its pale light made long, weird shadows that looked like the beast inside me.

The air felt strange like it was pulling something out of me.

The change was coming.

I could feel it in my bones, my tight muscles, and my stronger senses.

The scratching in the back of the cave happened more often.

Whatever was making those marks was still there, quiet in my hiding place.

Being scared of that thing made me even more worried.

Would it come out when I changed?

Would it hurt me?

The human part of me really wanted to fight this, to stay who I was.

But the beast inside felt excited for the moon to come.

It was a scary fight inside me.

The day before the full moon was cold and gray.

The sky looked sad like I felt.

I knew tonight was the night.

The beast would come out again.

And I couldn't stop it.

I had a desperate idea. Run away.

If I couldn't control changing, maybe I could run far away.

If I got far from the cave, away from anyone else, maybe… maybe I wouldn't hurt anyone.

It was a small chance, but it was all I had.

When it started to get dark, the sky turned purple and gray.

I started to go.

My body felt heavy, but I really needed to escape.

I squeezed out of the small cave opening.

The cold night air hurt my skin.

I started to run, pushing myself as hard as I could.

The trees went by fast, and I couldn't breathe well.

The moon, just a little bit of white in the trees, looked like it was laughing at me for trying to run.

But the change happened faster than I thought.

My bones started to ache really bad.

My muscles started to twitch.

My eyes went blurry, and the forest looked weird.

A low growl came from my chest without me trying.

"No," I said, but my voice already sounded different. "Not yet."

My back bent up, and a sharp pain went through me.

My arms and legs started to get longer, bending in ways they shouldn't.

My clothes ripped more as my body got bigger.

I tripped. My legs wouldn't do what I wanted anymore.

My hands, which I was holding tight, started to change.

My fingernails got long and hard, like claws.

The normal world was disappearing, and I could only feel what the beast felt.

I panicked.

I had to get away.

But my body wasn't mine anymore.

The change was happening, faster and stronger than before.

I could feel the pull of the moon, and I couldn't fight it.

I tried to fight it, to remember being Liam, but it was like trying to stop a rock slide.

The change was like a big wave, going over me, taking me over.

My jaw started to stick out, my teeth got long and sharp.

A loud animal roar came out of my throat.

I fell onto all fours.

My human body was twisting into the monster I was scared of.

Running away wasn't going to happen.

The moon, now a little bit of silver in the trees, shone on my changing body.

The beast was coming.

And this time, it felt different. Faster. Stronger.

And the scratching from the cave echoed in my fading human thoughts.

Would I be alone in the dark?