Chapter 4

After saying goodbye to Crystal, Isla, Victoria, and Mark, another co-worker of mine, I closed the back door slowly before walking towards the bus stop. The chilly wind instantly greets me, making me hug my books around my chest tightly. The weather has been unusually cold at night.

“Hey”.

My eyebrows instantly furrowed together in displeasure as soon as I caught sight of Kai in front of me.

“What are you doing here?”, I ask him bitterly.

Seriously, I have already lost count on how many times I have been asking him the same question. He always appeared in front of me unannounced.

“I'll take you home”, he said, as usual with a smile on his face.

“No”, my stern reply made his smile fade from his face.

I don’t know what he was thinking when he said he wanted to take me home. Is he out of his mind?

“Hanna, please. Just let me, okay?”, he begs me.

“No. Can you just go home? Stop following me”, I say strictly before walking away from him.

“Just come with me. It’s already dark”, he begs me desperately as he blocks my way.

I can’t hide the annoyance on my face as I looked at him. So what with the darkness? I have practically lived like this for years now.

“I said, I don’t want to. Why are you so stubborn? Can you just leave me alone?”, I said, anger lacing in my voice.

“No, I can’t. I don’t want to. Come with me, please?”, he begs me over and over again.

There’s desperation on his face, I can see that. But why does he need to be concerned about me? He’s no one. I close my eyes, trying to control my anger when I’m actually almost ripping out my hair in frustration right now.

“Listen…”, I starts angrily. “I don’t have time to argue with you right now. Why don’t you find other person to mess with? I’m not worth for your time”, I say with irritation in my voice.

I only manage to make two steps further before he blocks my way again. God, why is he so annoying?

“Come with me, alright?”, he said, ignoring all of my words earlier.

I’m about to lash out my anger at him, but I instantly stop when I see the bus has arrived at the bus stop.

“You want me to come with you, right? Take the bus, then”, I told him and hurriedly walked towards the bus stop.

I don’t have the power to argue with him anymore. I’m exhausted, burned out, and dead tired. I just have my bed right now.

I immediately hop on the bus and sit down on the nearest seat after tapping my transportation card. I stare outside the window, sighing in relief when I finally escape from him.

“Can I pay by card instead?”

My ‘relief’ moment was gone in an instant, the moment I heard his voice. I didn’t have to turn my head to know he was here too, on the bus, with me. I don’t expect that he will take the bus either. Now, I’m so close to ripping out his hair.

“You have cash?”

I heard the driver ask him.

There was a moment of silence before he answered, “No”.

“I’m afraid you have to hop off this bus, young man”, the driver ask politely.

“But…”

Knowing how stubborn he is, I unwillingly get up and walk towards the driver to pay for him. I smile apologetically at the driver before returning to my seat without looking at him. As soon as I sit down on my seat, he walks passed by me and sit down behind me. I had enough today.

Hearing the giggling from the girls makes me sigh. They even took out their phones to take a picture of him. I take a glance at him. He doesn’t mind it. Maybe he has already grown accustomed to it. Back in the cafe, he also didn’t care when the girls took pictures of him.

When our eyes meet, I quickly look away and stare outside the window instead. Their giggle got louder, and I let out another deep sigh.

What is happening with my quiet life?

As I hop off the bus, he followed me from behind. He annoyed me so much that I want to yell at him but I chose to ignore him instead.

“It’s dark here”, he commented, breaking the silence between us.

I keep quiet, don’t have the intention to answer him. I know the alley is dark. I have walked here for years already.

“Hanna, it’s dark here”, he raises his voice a bit higher than before.

I sigh again. He is so childish.

“I knew. They only have one or two street lamps over here”, I reply impassively.

I don’t say anything when he walks beside me after that. We were walking in sync, step by step. I’m too tired to scold him. So, I let him do whatever he wanted to.

“Why they don’t do something about this dark street”, he asks, seems angry at whoever held the responsibility.

“Simple. They don’t care about us. Who will though?”, I say with no interest.

Of course, they will not care if it is someone like me, who has nothing to offer them.

“I will. I care about you”, he says with a determination that makes me look at him.

His eyes are bright and shine with sincerity. It actually moves me, moves my heart. For a moment, I want to believe in him.

“Why are you even here, Kai?”

I think it is the second time I have called his name, and it doesn’t sound that bad actually.

He is quiet for a moment before he speak, “I want to see you. Actually, I want to apologize for what had happened in the library the other day. I swear, I don’t mean to laugh at you or anything. I just find you cute so… My point is, I’m really sorry if I offended you”, he says apologetically.

It is the first time I see him like this. He seems unsure, hesitant and cautious unlike his usual behaviour that is so full of himself that makes me can’t stand him even for a second.

I nod my head and smile at him. A genuine smile, for the first time we meet. Shrugging off the word ‘cute’ out of my mind, I looked away from him.

“It’s nothing. I’m used to people laughing at me”, I unknowingly confess to him.

I don’t know what's wrong with me. It is unusual for me to speak out my feeling like this. Maybe, his sincerity has reached my heart or I’m too exhausted to even think properly.

“You can’t get used to something like that. I don’t like it”, he scolds me, making me laugh.

When he is quiet, which is so unusual of him, I turn my head towards him. My laugh died down in an instant when he looked at me like that. I don’t know how to describe it. It’s like his gaze is piercing into my soul.

I bit my lower lip and turned away from him, I felt anxious under his intense gaze.

“We are here”, I say quietly, forcing a small smile despite the awkwardness.

“Oh…”

I raise my head towards him, and I don’t know why I feel offended hearing his words.

“Obviously, I can’t afford a big and beautiful house like yours”, my voice came out small, as I was so close to crying.

It is not even my house. It is Aunt Rosie’s. I will never trade it for any house.

He immediately looks at me. Panic was written all over his face when he realized I was about to cry.

“Oh, God! No! That’s not what I mean! I mean, no. It’s darker here, and I just can’t imagine how you can walk down the streets alone like this. Are you not scared? Anything can happen to you. What if someone took you? and I… I... Damn, what if something happened to you? Hanna, I don’t mean anything. It just, damn, I’m so stupid, right?”, he tried to explain but ended up running his fingers through his hair in frustration.

I blink and chase away the tears that are threatening to fall down from my face. Instead, I let out a small chuckle that made he looks at me in confusion.

“Who is in their right mind to take me? I have nothing to offer them. Unlike you. You have everything. I’m sure they will gladly take you instead of me. Plus, this neighbourhood is lively on the day ”, I smile at him.

“If only you know…”

“Sorry? What?”, I said, not really catching what he said.

He only give me a small smile. “I’m sorry if I offended you again. I don’t mean it. I really am”, he asks me for forgiveness which I gladly accept it.

“It’s alright. I’m just overreacting”, I tell him. I’m so used to people mocking me that I mistook that he would do the same, too. “So, goodbye”, I said, smiling.

His face seems gloomy all of sudden. Before I walk towards my house, I suddenly remember something. After finding what I am looking for in my bag, I turn towards him and hand the card.

“The card. You can’t take a bus without this”, I explain to him.

“Damn! I haven’t paid you for earlier yet.”

Shaking my head at him, I say, “It’s okay. Don’t mind it. Take it”, I force him. He eyes the card in my hand. It seemed he would not take it. “Alright. I will wait until you take it”. He still doesn’t budge. “I’m so tired. I wish I could go inside already. I’m…”, I stop mid-way when he finally takes it.

“You should head inside and rest. Thank you for this, I’ll give it to you tomorrow”, he tell me.

“It’s alright. Just passed it to Luna.”

For a moment, I thought he was going to argue with me, but he only nodded his head.

I smile at him and walk to my home.

“Don’t forget to dream of me”, he yells loudly.

I turn my heard towards him and made a horror face. I shook my head at him when I heard his laughter.

Maybe, having him around is not that bad after all.