Chapter Nine: “A Deal in the Court of Gods”

Heaven was abuzz. Again.

The Crown Prince's name had returned to the scrolls of the Celestial Register—and not in the "glorious divine return" kind of way. It sat there like a tea stain on an official robe: untidy, embarrassing, and hard to scrub out.

Yet no action had been taken. The heavenly officials whispered in marble corridors, wondering why.

Until today.

In the grand Hall of Ascension, ministers of war and wisdom lined the steps. Ling Wen adjusted her scrolls. Fu Yao stood with crossed arms, as if daring anyone to comment. Nan Feng looked like he had swallowed a whole lemon.

And at the center of it all, radiating charm like an offensive cologne: General Pei Ming.

"I'll say it plainly," Pei Ming declared, sword slung casually over one shoulder. "Leave them be."

Stunned silence. A celestial cloud passed awkwardly overhead.

"You what?" thundered General Xuan Ji from the side.

Pei Ming shrugged, maddeningly calm. "Look. The Ghost King hasn't attacked Heaven in centuries. He's caused less trouble than some of our own. And the Crown Prince? He's just trying to live a quiet life in the woods with his… husband? Situationship? I don't know. Point is: they're not a threat."

Ling Wen cleared her throat. "You've spent the last few hundred years calling Hua Cheng a blight upon the heavens."

"Yes," Pei Ming nodded. "And I've also spent the last few hundred years chasing doomed romances, so maybe I learned a thing or two."

There was another pause.

"You're doing this because of that one ghost bride, aren't you?" Nan Feng muttered.

Pei Ming ignored him entirely. "Besides, Xie Lian's survived worse. If he can handle me, he can handle Hua Cheng."

That somehow made it worse.

But Pei Ming's support tipped the scales. Jun Wu remained silent. And silence, in Heaven, was as good as a blessing.

Meanwhile, at Puqi Shrine

"I'm telling you, something's wrong. Heaven is too quiet," Xie Lian muttered, pruning a small hibiscus bush near the gate.

"I'd call that a miracle," Hua Cheng said from where he lounged under the wutong tree, a folded fan hiding most of his smirk.

"Did you do something? Bribe someone? Threaten someone?"

"Gege, please," Hua Cheng said innocently, "I'd never bribe anyone. Threaten, maybe."

Xie Lian gave him a look.

"Relax. I may have… encouraged a certain General Pei to speak up."

"With what?"

Hua Cheng chuckled. "Let's just say Pei Ming owed me a favor involving a former flame, a broken fan, and a very persistent vengeful spirit bride. Ancient history."

Xie Lian sighed. "Only you."

"And that's why you love me."

That Night

They sat together in the shrine's inner hall, incense burning low and quiet. Xie Lian was brushing his hair when Hua Cheng casually reached into his sleeve.

"I got you something," Hua Cheng said.

Xie Lian blinked. "Another robe?"

"Something better."

He handed over a slim black bracelet, inlaid with red stones that shimmered faintly in the light.

"It's enchanted," he said, far too casually.

"Oh?" Xie Lian held it up. "What does it do?"

"Just a small illusion. A harmless transformation." Hua Cheng leaned in, lips curving. "You'll see."

Xie Lian narrowed his eyes. "You're not allowed to enchant things that vague."

"Try it."

Xie Lian hesitated—but slipped it on.

There was a shimmer of heat, like a sunbeam catching on water, and—

Pop.

"Wha—?!"

Two velvet-soft cat ears perched atop Xie Lian's head, twitching at the slightest sound. His eyes, now slit-pupiled, glinted gold in the firelight. A slim tail flicked once behind him, curling in confusion.

He stared at Hua Cheng in abject horror.

"San Lang. What. Is. This."

Hua Cheng beamed, far too pleased with himself.

"Perfect," he said. "Now you really are my lucky cat."