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Werewolves: The Apocalypse — The Book of Hungry Names
(Now with 98% more ecological guilt and 100% less graphics)

You and your band of traumatized werewolves (read: a group of poorly resolved furry therapists) must save the Living Earth using two infallible ingredients: homicidal rage and questionable spirituality.

In this interactive novel with hundreds of choices (most leading to inevitable doom), you'll have the chance to face a Wyrm Spirit that manifests itself as... a lie you really want to believe. Like that voice that says "I'll start my diet tomorrow." Only with more cosmic destruction.

 Written by Kyle Marquis and set in the wonderful (cough) universe of World of Darkness, this epic without a single image (but with 1.6 million words, in other words, an abusive relationship with reading) is fueled solely by the most powerful thing in the world: your imagination that has already failed three college entrance exams.

You are a werewolf. And like all good werewolf, you are a mix of:

Shaman who thinks meditation cures demonic migraines,

Hero that nobody asked for,

Monster with existential crises,

And sustainability consultant for Mother Gaia (bankrupt, of course).

Created by the goddess of the Earth, you were gifted with the ability to turn into a wolf (in other words, walk around naked with style), and tasked with the noble mission of preventing humanity from turning the planet into a cosmic McTrash.

But guess what? You failed. Congratulations.

 Three years ago, your pack was part of the Sept of Broad Brook, Massachusetts (land of maple syrup and spiritual doom), where werewolves still pretended they had a chance against the Wyrm — the spirit of destruction, chaos, and people who comment “first” on YouTube.

While other Septs fell like dominoes at a satanic rave, yours was there, firm, strong, and deluded. Some said you would prevent the Apocalypse. Others just thought it was funny to watch the circus burn.

Now, all that’s left is for you to pick up the pieces (literally), avoid becoming an evil spirit’s kibble, and, who knows, write your name in the Book of Hungry Names — the one that eats hopes, New Year’s promises, and happy endings.

Do you want me to adapt this to become the introduction to chapter 1 as well?

Of course! Here's a Desciclopédia-style warning, with a touch of acid and humor, that you can put at the beginning of your story on Wattpad to make everything clear:

WARNING BEFORE SOME LITIGIOUS SPIRIT COMES TO BARK

This work is a humorous reinterpretation (read: full of irony, sarcasm, dark humor and some inconvenient truths) based on the style of interactive stories like those from Choice of Games. But, before anyone calls the lawyers or invokes the spirit of copyright, let's make something VERY clear:

This is not plagiarism. It's parody. It's a joke. It's entertainment.

(And, let's be honest, not even Mother Gaia would bother to sue.)

The writing adopted follows the Desciclopédia style, that is:

Nothing is sacred.

Everything can be a joke.

If you get offended, congratulations, the system worked.

 This is a tongue-in-cheek homage to the classics of the genre, using the interactive format to tell stories that are bizarre, tragic, hilarious, and incredibly stupid (sometimes all at the same time). None of the original Choice of Games content was copied directly—only the structure was inspired, because let’s face it, reinventing the wheel is a lot of work.

If you want an epic journey with deep moral dilemmas, go play the original.

If you want to laugh at your own misfortune while turning into a werewolf and punching mystical capitalism with your paws, go ahead. It’s your house.

Zerk World) Zombo Stars

Ahote nods appreciatively, even as Haken pushes through the crowd to you, growling incoherently as he forces you back to the far wall.

"You couldn't be content just voting for us to continue in slavery. Oh no. You had to make it personal." Haken's words are laced with spittle, peppering your face with a freckling of warm wetness. "Well, you should watch yourself, little wolf. Maybe all this lot needs to get them moving is an incident that can be blamed on the humans. A fatal one. Maybe the violent death of a pup who just wanted peace."

He snorts and backs away slowly, melding into the crowd. "Watch your back, kid."

The end results of the vote don't surprise you. The majority favor starting with Ahote's approach, although many wolves voiced their support for Haken's plan if the protest doesn't improve conditions. You hope fervently that you were right in your decision to back Ahote so publicly. Haken's threat isn't something to be taken lightly.

Ahote holds up his hands for silence. "We have all witnessed here tonight a public vote of our peers. The results, while not unanimous, clearly indicate that the majority of the pack favors a peaceful resolution. To that end, we will not be attending our jobs tomorrow morning. Instead, we will march through the streets of Haven, open and unafraid. We will show the humans that we are neither savage animals nor slaves to be exploited. At no point will we attack or harass the humans. In the event that you are attacked, do your best to disengage, fighting back as a method of last resort."

Haken grunts loudly enough to be heard over Ahote's speech.

"For now we'll leave this hall two and three at a time to return to our homes. I don't think I need to explain the need for secrecy to any of you. Avoid the patrols and watch your backs—in numbers we have power, but individually the humans can pick us apart. Tomorrow we'll show them what solidarity looks like. We'll gather at seven by the southern green. Get your sleep. We'll all need it."

Over the next half hour, the assembled wolves leave in pairs to return to their homes. Lapu waves to you from the crowd, and you make your way over to him through the tides of closely packed bodies waiting by the exit, eager to get to their beds.

"So how do you really feel about this fiasco? I know it's tough to speak your mind when a whole crowd is watching, but you can be honest with me," Lapu says in a hushed whisper, scratching at his blond hair nervously. "I'm so nervous, I've started to shed."

"Pushing back against the humans. Whichever way you slice it, it's gonna be bad. Even Ahote's march is doomed to failure," the boy says gloomily.

"I agree with Ahote's position. We need to show the humans that we're not beasts or slaves."

"Ahote's march doesn't go far enough. Haken has the right idea."

"You may be right, Lapu, but what else can we do?"

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