CHAPTER 24

> "The pinnacle of forbearance, proud of the world—with me, Onoki, there will be heaven!"

The bold declaration echoed in the chamber. Onoki, Third Tsuchikage of Iwagakure, stroked his beard with pride. He liked it. It had flair.

Squinting with satisfaction at the blond youth above, Onoki chuckled. Deidara… that brat had really grown.

"Bah! Shameless flattery!"

Below, Kurotsuchi clicked her tongue as she crossed her long legs. Deidara's charm was nothing new. She'd seen that same act back when he was begging for her help.

> Tch. Without me around, your brown-nosing has only gotten worse, Deidara.

Her eyes gleamed with mischief. Her gaze shifted to her grandfather. If possible… she wanted him to bring Deidara back.

No—she would take care of that.

Kidnap him.

Reclaim him.

Drag his stupid, smug, clay-loving face back to Iwagakure if she had to!

"Grandpa?"

Kurotsuchi blinked, caught off guard by Onoki's stern glare.

"Black Soil," he called her by her name with unusual gravity. "If you were even half as clever as Deidara, the title of Fourth Tsuchikage would be yours already!"

"WHAT!?"

She practically exploded.

It wasn't the idea of becoming Tsuchikage that offended her—she didn't even want the job. Too much work. Too much diplomacy. Besides, nobody dared mess with her anyway.

But Deidara? HALF as clever?

> Are you joking? One toe of mine is smarter than that clown!

"Heh, still not convinced." Onoki shook his head, amused. Kurotsuchi was sharp—but too proud. Too rigid.

"What did you learn from Deidara just now?"

"Che, what? That he's a suck-up? Big deal."

Onoki's expression darkened, and Kurotsuchi immediately threw on her best innocent face.

"Grandpaaaa~ My wise, strong, handsome Grandpaaa~ Tell meee~~ Pretty pleaseee?"

"Ugh, I give up…" He chuckled, brushing her head gently. That act worked every time.

"Deidara used one well-placed compliment," Onoki said, voice lowering into lecture mode, "and not only escaped danger, but turned it into advantage. In the ninja world, when you can't overwhelm with strength, adaptability is king."

He paused, looking directly into her eyes.

"A real man knows how to bend and stretch. He sees the tides of power. Learns when to press forward and when to yield."

"Even the Third Raikage, strong enough to stand alone against ten thousand, fell because he didn't know how to retreat. Never forget that."

Kurotsuchi groaned internally. Another long lecture.

Still… her eyes flicked back to Deidara.

Was he really that strong?

Even Grandpa… looked proud of him.

Maybe…

Maybe I really will bring that idiot back.

---

Meanwhile, in Konoha…

"Huh? My name?"

Naruto Uzumaki froze.

Wait a second.

> My name's showing up more and more…

Did this mean—could it mean—?

> I'm the protagonist!?

The realization hit him like a Rasengan to the gut. He rubbed his chin thoughtfully, trying to appear wise.

"As the #1 unexpected ninja… this question's gotta be about me!"

He stood proudly, chest puffed out, completely unaware of the girl peeking from behind a building.

Hinata Hyuga's pale eyes sparkled. Her cheeks flushed crimson.

> Naruto… the answer is definitely you…

A clan member tugged gently at her sleeve.

"Miss Hinata, it's time to return."

"Ah… okay." She glanced back one last time before reluctantly leaving, casting a shy, longing look at the back of the clueless boy.

---

Inside the Akatsuki Space…

Kisame Hoshigaki, the shark-faced swordsman, twitched with discomfort.

He was a killer. A criminal. A hardened rogue ninja.

But Deidara's endless, poetic flattery?

> Too much.

> Too powerful.

> If sucking up were an art… Deidara was a grandmaster.

He could barely stay seated.

Deidara had spoken for minutes without repeating a single line of praise. It made Kisame's skin crawl.

> I take it back. Forget my sword. That guy's tongue is deadlier than Samehada.

He glanced at the leader.

"Leader," Kisame began, "this question… those five named, especially Matekai, they're serious threats. If they act together, they could…"

Nagato raised a hand.

Silence fell.

He wasn't ready to discuss strength anymore.

Emotionally, he'd been through a rollercoaster—from shock to pride, from doubt to blind arrogance.

Payne's voice dripped with overconfidence.

> "Deidara was right. Compared to me, these five are mere slogans. Konoha is but a speck of dust beneath my feet!"

His gaze swept across the room.

"So I will do the opposite of what the question implies. I don't know who among the five is the strongest—but I know who is the weakest."

He pointed toward the screen.

> "Naruto Uzumaki."

> "He is the weakest."

Silence.

And then—

FURY.

---

Back in Konoha…

Explosions of rage burst through the Hidden Leaf.

Every ninja, every villager—young and old—was FUMING.

"Did he just call Konoha a chicken and dog?!"

"He called Naruto the WEAKEST?!"

"Oh hell no!"

"We're the STRONGEST village, you bastard! People BEG to live here!"

"Try living outside the walls! You'll get hit by a stray Fireball just buying groceries!"

"Akatsuki my ass! Come try us, see what happens!"

"The Hokage will wipe the floor with you!"

"Nah, don't wait for the Hokage—let me handle 'em!"

"Me too! I've got seven uncles in Konoha and a katana named 'Painkiller'!"

"TO HOKAGE'S OFFICE!"

"LET'S PETITION TO LET THEM INTO THE VILLAGE!"

"Yeah, let them in… so we can destroy them all!"

A mob formed.

A glorious, righteous, furious mob, heading for Hokage Tower in a wave of patriotic rage.