The Shape of Soft Beginnings

The room felt to silent, caleb sat on the end of the couch, blanket folded neatly beside him, as if touching it without permission might shatter the fragile grace she had just extended. Belladonna hovered in the hallway, arms wrapped tightly around herself, unsure whether to sit, speak or simply breathe. She had let him in but letting someone in wasn't the same as letting them back. "Do you want water?" she asked, finally breaking the silence. He looked up, startled by the kindness in her voice soft, cautious, but not cold. "Yeah," he said "Thanks." She disappeared into the kitchen, the clink of glass filling the stillness between them. Caleb let his eyes wander her apartment hadn't changed much. Still filled with plants in mismatched pots, warm light from fairy bulbs pinned gently across the ceiling, and the scent of lavender and sandalwood that had always reminded him of her but something had changed.

 She moved differently now. Spoke like someone who had learned the hard way that love doesn't always come back. She seemed a little taller in her grief, like the sadness had stretched her into something stronger. When she returned, she handed him the glass without meeting his gaze. Thanks, he said quietly, fingers brushing hers for a second too long. She didn't pull away, but she didn't linger either. I thought about messaging you so many times, she said, sitting in the armchair across from him. I kept deleting it. Why? because i didn't want to be the only one holding on again. Her voice didn't waver but Caleb flinched anyway. I never wanted to make you feel like you were chasing me, he said but i see now you were. You were chasing me with your consistency, your patience, and your presence.

 He set the glass down and leaned forward, elbows on knees, heart exposed. I was the one who ran, Bella. Not because i didn't love you, but because you loved me in ways i didn't think i deserved. And it scared the hell out of me. She looked at him then. Really looked. And for the first time in weeks, she didn't see the man who left she saw the boy behind him. The one who had grown up learning to protect himself by disappearing. That's the thing about fear, she said. It tells you to leave before someone else gets the chance to break you. You weren't the only one who was scared, Caleb i was scared too i just stayed anyway. His lips parted, as if to apologize, but she stopped him with a hand. I'm not saying this to guilt you. I'm saying it because if you really want to be here now you need to understand what being here actually means. He nodded, slowly, like every word was stitching him back into reality.

 It means consistency, she continued. It means showing up even when you're tired. It means saying I'm struggling instead of going silent. It means not disappearing when I get emotional, or when things get hard. It means partnership. She paused. Then added, quieter: "It means being safe for me, the way i tried to be safe for you." Caleb swallowed hard. His eyes shimmered, but he didn't look away. I can't promise perfection, he said. but i can promise presence. I'm not the man i was when i left. I've been unpacking things, in therapy, in silence, in books i swore I'd never read. That surprised her, her brows lifted. "Therapy?" He chuckled a little. Yeah, Started two weeks after I left. A friend gave me a number, and I called her after waking up for the fifth night in a row dreaming about you. Belladonna leaned back, arms unfolding just slightly. "Why didn't you tell me all this before now?" "Because I thought you'd moved on. Or that you hated me. Or that I didn't deserve another chance."

 She tilted her head. "And now?" I'm still not sure I deserve it, he said honestly but I know I want to earn it. The room filled with a quiet kind of emotion the kind that doesn't scream or shatter, but rests softly between people who are trying to rebuild what was once broken. You left a scar, she said, her voice gentler now but I'm not asking you to erase it. I just need to know you won't keep reopening it. I won't, he said without flinching. Even if it means starting as friends, even if it means no labels, even if you need time to trust me again. I'll show up as long as you'll let me. She let that sit. Let herself feel the truth of it not the weight of old promises, but the lightness of a new possibility. Then she asked the question that had been sitting in her chest all night Why now, Caleb? Why come back now?" He leaned back on the couch, eyes skyward for a moment before settling back on her.

 The silence got too loud. Because I missed you in ways I couldn't outrun because i saw you in strangers, heard your laugh in songs, and kept checking my phone for a message I didn't deserve. A beat passed. His voice dropped because the version of me without you was hollow. And i don't want to be hollow anymore. Belladonna's throat tightened. She wanted to stay guarded. To protect the healing she had worked so hard for but part of healing she realized, was knowing when to let hope speak again. She stood slowly and walked toward the window. The city outside blinked quietly, the streets empty and soft under the moonlight. She turned to him, and for the first time, she smiled Just a little. I don't know what this is going to look like, she said. Me neither, he replied. but maybe we can figure it out together. Caleb stood, a little hesitant, as if she might take it back but she didn't.

 She stepped closer. Close enough to hear his breath, Close enough to remember how it felt when they didn't need words to feel safe. And then she whispered, One step at a time. He reached for her hand gentle, open and this time, she let him take it. No promises no pressure, just presence. It wasn't a full reconciliation, it wasn't fireworks or falling back into bed. It was real, and that after everything, was enough for tonight.