Chapter 2: Just as Planned

Laughter erupted from every direction, a chorus of mocking giggles echoing from behind a shimmering curtain of light.

"Pfft! My stomach hurts from laughing! And to think we didn't even bother to stop her from explaining that ridiculous power to her little human!"

"I'm honestly shocked! He's tanking everything just to grab that worthless ability? Who'd object to that?"

"No objections here… Guess he really meant it about dodging those 'heavy responsibilities.' Let's not underestimate him, though. But… if we don't toss him something, won't he just die in a week?"

"No objections, meow! I'm down to help out a bit, meow!"

"Ha! One less rival to worry about, right? Gotta love the genius who nerfs his attack by 10 to boost it by 5! No objections from me!"

"Let him have it! I'm all for giving that human his dumb little power!"

"Rawr~! A brutal curse for a measly half-strength blessing? No objections~!"

"Heh heh heh! I give him 30 days tops before he's toast. No objections!"

"Bwahaha! Look at Miss Bottom-Feeder's human! I'm not objecting—give him that pathetic power!"

"Pfft! They're practically made for each other, aren't they? No objections, yo!"

"A match made in a dumpster fire, right? Heehee! No objections!"

"We all approve! Take that garbage power and go!"

"No objections, my dear! But should we throw in a little extra for that human?"

"I'm in! Let's help Miss Loser out a bit… Hah! I'd hate to see her demoted to cleaning unicorn poop!"

"Ugh, don't lie—your face says you'd love to see her crash and burn! No objections to that silly power, and I'm fine with tossing her human a bone. I mean, he's already nerfed himself into oblivion—might as well let him dig his own grave!"

Hearing those voices—other goddesses, I presume?—it all clicked. Even goddesses have their pecking order, sneering and clawing at each other like it's a corporate rat race. And the weakest one? The one with the worst track record or the most haters? Yeah, she's got it rough…

"Sniff… Damn it…" My goddess, still clinging to my leg, sobbed. "See that, you jerk? Not even a minute in, and they're already dunking on me! I don't wanna be demoted to trash goddess!"

Poor thing. She's hugging my leg like her life depends on it, looking up with those teary, puppy-dog eyes, tears streaming down her face.

"Even slimes get at least three skills," a new voice cut in. "Your average villager? Four or five, learned through experience. So, we'll hook you up with some decent—but not too broken—skills. No need to unlock them the hard way. How's four normal skills and one special skill sound? Everyone agree?"

"Agreed!" x98

A dazzling goddess with flowing golden hair and, uh, generous assets—probably the big shot among this divine crowd—stepped out from the curtain of light with her proposal.

"But I—"

Crunch!

My personal goddess tightened her grip on my leg, practically strangling it.

"Your blessing… Urgh… Pick those extra skills carefully, got it?!" she hissed. "No more stupid choices!"

"Don't worry," the golden-haired goddess said with a smirk. "These five skills won't add to that 'great responsibility' nonsense you're so allergic to."

"Got it…"

What else could I say? If they're handing out freebies, I'll take 'em! Even if I've already snagged a sneaky, game-breaking ability like [CurseHBless]. Heh heh heh…

The busty blonde goddess waved her hand, and a massive skill menu popped up—millions of skills, complete with a handy magnifying glass for searching. Talk about user-friendly!

"Alright, human, pick your poison," she said. "We're giving you four Normal skills and one guaranteed Rare skill, no restrictions—no race, class, or annoying prerequisites. Choose wisely. Don't make 'Melt' look any worse than she already does."

Melt? Cute name for the goddess still latched onto my leg. Kinda suits her… all melty and emotional.

I didn't waste time. I dove into the skill menu, reading every description carefully. The goddesses waited patiently for hours while I made my picks.

Finally, I settled on my combo—perfect for synergizing with my [CurseHBless]:

[Item Box]

[Doppelganger]

[Perfect Shapeshift]

[Possession]

And for the grand finale, my trump card:

[Overlimit]

"All survival skills?!" Melt wailed. "You're really not planning to compete with anyone, are you? Ugh… At least try to survive for 100 years!"

"Haha, I'll do my best to avoid fights and make it to 100," I said with a grin. "But if I get sick, murdered, or just keel over from old age, that'd suck."

"All survival skills, huh?" the golden-haired goddess mused. "So you're not here to fight at all. Fine. The rest of us—who aren't stuck babysitting you—will throw in immunity to disease, no aging, and an unlimited lifespan. That's our best offer. Any objections?"

"No objections!" x98

Jackpot!

"Alright, human," she said. "Anything you wanna say to your goddess before you go?"

I turned to Melt. "Hey, Melt… I'm sorry for only thinking about coasting through life. But I promise I'll make the most of this new world and won't let you down!"

"Sniff… Okay…" she mumbled, wiping her eyes. "Good luck out there! Come back in one piece! I'll be rooting for you to survive those 100 years!"

"Thanks a ton!"

The moment I answered, everything went blinding white.

…Whoosh…

Open Field, Midday

Enemy Encountered:

Pink Slime LV 1

HP: 50

EXP: 1

SkillXP: 1

I swung my LV 1 dagger at the slime. Swoosh! A pathetic 10 damage. The slime retaliated, and I barely dodged, stumbling like an idiot. I swung again—10 damage! Dodge, swing, dodge, swing. After what felt like forever, the slime finally popped.

Poof!

Displayed Stats:

[XXX gained 1 EXP, 1 SkillXP]

[XXX LV UP: LV1 > LV1 50%]

[XXX Skill UP: SLV1 > SLV1 50%]

True Stats (Visible Only to Me):

[XXX gained 2 trillion EXP, 2 trillion SkillXP]

[XXX LV UP: LV1 > LV9121, CurseHBless > LV1 50%]

[XXX Skill LV UP: LV1 > LV1511, CurseHBless > LV1 50%]

[XXX gained 45,600 Status Points, CurseHBless > 27,800 Points]

[XXX gained 1,510 Skill Points, CurseHBless > 755 Points]

[CurseHBless]

[Curse #0]

All Stats, Items, and Skills visible to others are drastically lower than their true values, making you a laughingstock. You cannot set these values when no one's checking.

[Blessing #0]

All Stats, Items, and Skills visible to others are drastically lower than their true values, making you a laughingstock. You can set these values when someone's checking.

[Curse #1]

When attacking Pink Slime LV 1 from 4:00 PM to 8:00 AM (16 hours), EXP gained is divided by 4 trillion, and normal attacks heal the slime for 40% of its Max HP per hit.

[Blessing #1]

When attacking Pink Slime LV 1 from 8:01 AM to 3:59 PM (8 hours), EXP gained is multiplied by 2 trillion, and normal attacks deal 20% of the slime's Max HP per hit.

[Curse #2]

EXP/SXP gained raises your level to grant the full Status and Skill Points for that level, but the level cap is cursed to never exceed 1 LV per gain.

[Blessing #2]

EXP/SXP gained raises your level to grant half the Status and Skill Points for that level, but the level cap is blessed to never exceed 0.5 LV per gain.

[CurseHBless]

I stared at my curses and blessings, a sly grin creeping across my face. A chuckle bubbled up in my chest.

It worked… Heh heh heh… IT WORKED! HAHAHAHA!

Oh, Melt, my adorable goddess, you don't need to worry. Your boy right here? I'm gonna be stronger than anyone in this world. But I'll do it sneaky—the most OP guy around, while everyone still thinks I'm wet garbage!

Everything…

"Just as planned!"

End of Chapter 2

Just As Planned