Thank you for spicing up our lives

If anyone had asked Lara how her morning was going, she might have answered honestly:

"Better than most, worse than some, and certainly more entertaining than yesterday's death threats."

Still, there were perks if being forced back into the official uniform of Celestian Royal Bodyguard after half a decade of half-retirement counted as a perk.

The new uniform was striking: black and gold shirt, high-collared and tailored close, its sharp lines hugging her frame and emphasizing every inch of muscle earned in years of campaign and chaos.

Gold buttons gleamed in the sunlight, the insignia on her breast an intertwined sun and flame declaring her status to anyone in the castle with eyes.

Her dark hair, streaked with crimson, was tied back at the nape of her neck, leaving her horns visible and her jaw uncompromised by stray strands.

As Lara walked the marble corridors, she felt the stares. Some were respectful. Some, from the younger guards and more than a few palace maids, were decidedly not.

A trio of kitchen staff nearly collided with a fruit cart as Lara strode by, whispering feverishly in her wake.

Yeah, it's the uniform, she thought, fighting back a smirk. Or maybe it's the muscles. Or the demonic charm. Or maybe they're just wondering why a demon is wearing Celestian regalia again.

She squared her shoulders, letting the heavy ceremonial sword clink at her hip. The Queen's orders had been explicit: three feet from Sarisa, at all times.

No exceptions. And if Lara even thought about sneaking off for a "cuddle break"—the Queen's words, to the horror of the entire guard staff—she'd be chained to the throne room for a month.

Lara was two steps from Sarisa's office, rehearsing her most professional, least-flirtatious smile, when a new face in guard livery stepped into her path.

She was tall, armored in black-and-silver, with a shock of white hair and an easy grin. "You must be the famous Lara," the woman said, leaning just a little too close.

"I've heard stories—some of them sound a bit exaggerated, but then again, you do look dangerous." She let her gaze slide over Lara, not even bothering to be subtle.

"So. How does someone get on your good side? Or, you know, any side at all?"

Lara gave her a once-over, appreciating the boldness if not the timing. "It helps if you don't try to flirt with someone on duty. That's usually a start."

The woman laughed. "Maybe off-duty, then? Or is that a crime here?"

Lara was about to fire back a suitable retort—something witty, something just enough to let the other woman know she still had it—when the door to Sarisa's office swung open.

Elysia stepped out, all icy elegance and regal confidence, but with a glint in her eye that Lara knew too well. She paused, took in the scene, then fixed the new guard with a look that could have wilted roses.

The guard instantly straightened, coughed, and mumbled something about checking the north corridor before beating a hasty retreat.

Elysia, never missing an opportunity, leaned against the doorframe and crossed her arms.

"Well, well. Someone's popular. Is this what happens when you wear the shiny uniform, or is it just that famous demon charisma?"

Lara rolled her eyes, not quite hiding a grin. "It's the uniform. And the biceps. You know how it is—put a sword on a demon and suddenly everyone wants to test if the legends are true."

Elysia snorted. "I heard half the staff in the east wing are placing bets on how many hearts you'll break by the end of the week. You've been here less than a day and there's already a queue."

"I don't break hearts," Lara protested, feigning innocence. "I just… rearrange expectations."

Elysia laughed. "Sure. You rearrange expectations, bedsheets, and occasionally the castle floor plan when you and Sarisa are in the same room. Speaking of which, your three-foot rule is legendary." she paused almost laughing.

"The Queen posted an official edict on the staff board: 'Lara is to remain no more than three feet from Princess Sarisa at all times. Violators will be subject to Her Majesty's wrath, which, as you know, is the seventh circle of bureaucracy.'"

Lara groaned, leaning her head back against the marble. "You're enjoying this way too much."

"I have to. It's either laugh or start taking bets myself." Elysia flashed a wicked smile. "But, truly, you wear the uniform well. If I weren't happily married to the Demon Queen, I'd be tempted to see if those stories are exaggerated."

Lara shot her a sidelong look, dry as dust. "You're safe. I don't make a habit of seducing my sisters-in-law. Besides, Malvoria would burn me alive, and Kaelith would sell tickets."

Elysia let out a delighted laugh. "Probably true! Still, you could at least pretend to flirt back. The guards need something to gossip about besides who's stealing the kitchen wine."

Lara straightened, crossing her arms. "I'm a model of propriety, I'll have you know. Besides, I'm a little out of practice. It's been a while since I flirted with anyone except Sarisa, and you know how that turned out."

Elysia's eyes sparkled with mischief. "Yes, it turned out with a small, fire-wielding chaos machine named Aliyah. Honestly, the rest of us should thank you both. The palace hasn't been the same since."

Lara gave her a playful shove. "That's not how you thank someone, Elysia."

Elysia adopted a mock-thoughtful expression. "You're right. Thank you, Lara, for spicing up our lives, our politics, and our insurance policies." She offered an exaggerated bow.

Lara rolled her eyes, but she was grinning now, the tension of the morning bleeding out with every joke. "Glad to be of service. Now, should I report for duty, or is this part of your official harassment schedule?"

Elysia pretended to consider.

"Hmm. As your sister-in-law, I'm obligated to keep you humble. As Sarisa's friend, I'm supposed to make sure you don't scare off all the eligible nobles. And as a citizen, I must ensure you're not plotting to abscond with the royal jewels."

She leaned closer, voice conspiratorial. "But mostly, I think you should get in there before Sarisa starts rearranging the castle walls without you."

"Right. Last time she tried, the east wing was closed for a week." Lara grinned, glancing over her shoulder at the now-quiet corridor. "Wish me luck?"

Elysia winked. "Always. And try not to seduce any more guards until after lunch. I need the palace to survive until Kaelith's nap."

Lara saluted with two fingers. "No promises."

She squared her shoulders, straightened her uniform, and stepped past Elysia, who gave her an encouraging pat on the back. "Go on, General. Your princess awaits."

Inside, the office was quiet, sunlight illuminating papers and the faint scent of ink and flowers.

But even before the door closed behind her, Lara could hear Elysia's muffled laughter echoing down the corridor, like a benediction and a dare.

This place, Lara thought, fighting a smile, is never dull.