This story follows Issei Hyoudou after he became a reincarnated devil. Watch his path to becoming the strongest dragon and being watched by a god of stories.

In DXD With A Task System

ROMANCE

SYSTEM

HAREM

OVERPOWERED

HIGHSCHOOL DXD

Great so far keep it up 




























































































































I really like the story so far. However, there are some things that I think are holding you back just a bit. Your story feels a bit to jumpy. There are things that characters in your story shouldn’t know certain information this soon and act a bit more robotic than personal. Like his mother just being okay with rias and the other girls she’s seen so far openly showing supernatural powers in front of them. Another thing is how you use time in this story makes it feel jumpy as well. It isn’t made clear how much time has passed from his revival to the current chapter (11). Some points the story seems to flow like a day to day timeline in other points it jumps forwards to weeks down the line with characters acting completely differently but it’s not made clear when this happens. They talk about his training but his actual training has only been shown / acknowledged once. Not saying there needs to be some super long training arc but just touch up on how you approach his training and the way time flows in the story. A good piece of advice (to me atleast) that I received about writing is even if your audience should know about your story subject treat them as if it’s the first time they’ve entered the topic. I think sometimes your writing the story as if we’re in your head with you so your timeline flows but as readers we aren’t so you end up missing a couple of key points that help your story flow better. 