Fifty Five

Chapter Fifty Five

Lucianna's POV

I swear that from the moment I sensed Jacob, my breath was uneven and my nerves were unease. I tried my best to act normal, trying to remember what Harley told me. To act like I don't know Jacob would be coming.

And its so fucking hard to do. I can sense him from mile away!

'Don't forget to act surprise.' Harley reminded me and I groaned as I closed my eyes for a second.

'Shut up.'

He's rather well behave, huh, thanking God he didn't bothered me after. Only to figure out why and its because in front of us is my mate, striding closer to us with a poker face but softened eyes.

My eyes widened when I saw Jacob walking towards me. I don't even have to act, huh? The moment I saw him, I was far from surprise. I'm nervous! But from the way Harley exhaled in relief, I must've looked surprised.

I looked around and try to look for anyone who I might know so I could divert my steps away from Jacob as to avoid him but everyone was new faces.

There's no way out, and I really think Jacob is headed to me! He's going to, what, talk to me? But we made a promise! So how can he do that, right?

My feet halted and Mual turned to me with questioning eyes. I can't continue my steps because Jacob is right there, five-foot away! His eyes didn't left mine, not even for a second, and the message his eyes sent to me are more like a plead. Pleading for me to stop and face him.

His lips parted to speak and I can't stop my eyes to focus on that red lips. Those lips that showered me with kisses in every part of my body…

Damn it, Lucianna! What are you thinking?!

"I've been--" my eyes darted up to his eyes when he talked but Harley moved forward, interrupted his Alpha.

"Oh! Our Alpha here wants to ask a favor, uh, from you. That maybe you can give advise to… uh, to the female fighters from the pack? Yes, they are beginners so. Yeah, right, Alpha Jacob?" Harley speech.

I didn't look at Harley, and neither did Jacob. We just stare at each other as if magnetized with each presence. And I can't fucking deny how drawn I am to him, right at this moment.

The way Jacob look at me says a lot.

Missing and longing is not enough to describe it. I feel like in any moment, he will jump unto me and lock me in a tight embrace but I also feel how he put resistance in himself.

Two women walked and stopped submissively beside Brent. I managed to take my eyes off Jacob and eyed the tall and muscular girls.

Though I can still feel Jacob's burning gaze in mine, he finally let go of the incredible pull and tilted his head to the side to look at his fighters.

"Are they just the two of them?" I asked to Brent because I lost the strength to look at him any more than what we did.

Brent stole a glance at Jacob as if hesitant to answer. I cursed inside my chest upon figuring that Jacob will probably converse with me. And anyone don't have the right to talk in behalf of him.

"Yes." Jacob said in a stern voice.

I have no choice but look at him now. His jaw are clenching and he seems annoyed by something.

If Mual didn't clear his throat beside me, I wouldn't have a clue of what could Jacob be thinking. Of course, his jealousy is still at the heights.

"Um, this is my friend. Mual." I introduced, taking a step back so I could stand beside Mual. "And this are Alpha Jacob of the Shadow pack, his Beta Brent and you've met Harley."

"Nice meeting you, Alpha Jacob." Mual greeted and extend a hand to my mate.

Jacob raised a brow as he watched the extended hand in front of him and my breath almost hitched when he finally accepting the hand shake.

I sighed in relief.

Mual moved closer to me to whisper, "You didn't tell me-"

"Lucianna." Jacob interrupted, making me snap my head to look at him. With my instinct, I took a step away from Mual and I'm not surprised when Mual put distance even more.

So Mual is about to say that he finally found out about Jacob and I, right?

"Y-Yes?" I blinked twice.

"I'd like to talk." he said with the same irritated expression in his face. Then he glanced at Mual for a while. I immediately got the message.

"Alpha Jacob means he wanted to talk about the advice you may vest upon our newborn female fighters here." Harley let out an awkward chuckle after saying that. I caught how Brent elbowed him discreetly.

They are so obvious.

Jacob eyed them tiredly and both of them stood straight.

"A-Alright." damn it, I'm stuttering!

Jacob didn't waste any second after hearing my consent. He walked to me, snaked his arms around my waist and let off a protective aura that was directed to Mual. I stopped myself from hissing.

He guided me to the woods where there was less participant and people around. Looking back, I saw Brent and Harley talked to Mual in a friendly way, shaking hands and all.

We stopped and he let go of my waist. Now, he was facing me and I tried my best to act normal in the midst of my heart almost falling to the ground.

I averted my eyes somewhere else but his. All my confidence seems to left my body, where is that girl who left this man with certainty go? I'm sure she's not inside me right now.

"Lucianna." he called.

I gulped. "Huh?" then I crossed my arms, maybe it will help my heart to be at ease.

There was a moment of silence in his part and I was curious as to how I don't hear him talk after. I took a peak of him and found his eyes darting through me and I quickly looked away.

"You…" he sighed. I bit my lip and cursed in my head from the way he sounded.

Like tired and hopeless, I define.

A low chuckle came from him and I frowned as I tilted my head to his side. I saw his face crumpled, as if pained but the sarcasm in there is definite.

"If you continue to act like that, I would know why I was only worth a letter." the side of his lip rose.

I was stunned and hurt for a long moment. I know Jacob can restrain himself stay away from me but I also know he won't be able to do that in consideration of our distance right now. I'm an arm-reach away, I can only imagine how much of control he have inside him.

Even though I wanted to be on his arms as bad as he must be feeling right now, I was reminded of the talk I had with Fhoxia.

There is something I was waiting for. I shouldn't move too hastily or lose my cool.

With that thought, I was able to wipe the feeling of guilt over what I did and pity over the man in front of me.

"Are we here to talk about that? I'm not interested in your choice of conversation, Jacob."

His jaw clenched and I stopped breathing when he took a step forward.

I'm looking up at him, not backing down with what I've said but I know Jacob is not capable of backing down, as well.

I was ready, alright? I've prepared myself for possible confrontation with Jacob just like this but no matter what the preparation, it is different when in the act.

"Can we talk if it fits your interest?" he asked in a low and calmed voice. It surprised me. I thought he will yell, be angered and such. I prepared for the worst and yet what come was…

I was out of words. Suddenly.

He moved his hand and caress the hair in my face, watching as the loose strands was wiped off of my face.

"Tell me what will interest you, Lucianna. Tell me what I should do to make you talk to me instead of a petty getaway letter."

"You--"

"Do you know how worthless I felt when I found that all you left behind for me is a piece of paper?"

The sides of my eyes burned and I slowly exhaled my hitched breath.

"Do you know how that piece of paper killed me?"

The way he talk, that slow and low agonizing voice, was marked in my deepest core. I know my shortcomings but I had to do all of that just to... know the truth. All I have with me is patience, to wait, to wait for two another weeks and talk with Fhoxia. Now, Jacob is making it hard for me to hold on to my patience.

I looked away because I was getting burned from his darting gaze. It's too much and my insides are in chaos.

"And just now, you can't even look at me. You can't afford to be close and I can feel how scared I am. That is why you only managed to left a letter, don't you? Because you can't really leave me. You just had to."

My eyes widened and I know I'm found but it does not mean I should confirm anything, right?

"You can continue with your little guessing game alone, Jacob. I don't have time for that, but! I have time to give some tips with your female fighters. Excuse me."

I turned around and didn't bother to look back. Surprisingly, I managed to say all that in the middle of my overwhelming emotions. The cursing I kept as mantra in my head helped a bit.

"Lucianna." he called after my few huge steps. I stopped, but I didn't look at him.

I heard his footsteps but he stopped just behind me. I was grateful that he didn't went in front of me or else I won't be able to hold myself further.

"Distance yourself with that friend." he said in a cold tone.

I hissed and tilted my head up, screwing my eyes shut.

"Jacob, Mual is kind and he is no threat-"

"Threat to me? I very much know that. But I'm afraid I'll be a threat for him." he chuckled. "Stay away from that man or I will kill him. There is no law that can stop me from protecting my mate."

Jacob walked past me after that.

My jaw was dropped as I looked at him walk away.

The way he speak is not… is he always like that? Did I got used of his kind ways of treating me that I think… he somehow sounded different.

Suddenly, Fhoxia's voice echoed in my head and reminded me of something.

"The second born was the one full of hatred, of anger and revenge. Slowly, they turned to something evil, doing sins and gradually becoming the sinned evil. We also found that every time the bearer of the eye is closer to the mate, his inner soul is being embedded by darkness."

Is this why Jacob's soul will be more sinned and filled with evil when he got to met me, his mate?

Too much is not good.

Too much is never sufficient.

Too much leads to much worst.

Jealousy, insecurities, hatred, and all that 'too much love' may bring.

Suddenly, an idea came into my head. A better understanding of something I didn't saw before, or I refuse to see.

"Jacob!" I called and run to him.