Chapter 27: First thing’s first!

Nikola knew that he had to search for the shaman, but the thought that he could get the mana stones appraised made him drag Dimitri out of bed and into the octopus's dimension.

The crates, however, were making it difficult to get to it.

The two have been moving the crates for the better part of the last two hours. Nikola didn't know what he was going to do with all the food.

There was no more space in the freezer for even a bag of cherries!

"I think you should start donating the food," Dimitri told him, as he picked up a heavy crate with potatoes and moved it to the side.

Only for another crate to come via tentacle to the now empty spot and to plant itself there.

"And can't you tell your worker to stop farming it all?"

"I think we should get some animals," Nikola said, as he picked up another crate loaded with tomatoes. For some reason, the food didn't spoil, no matter how long it had stayed in the shed.

Giving it to a soup kitchen was not an option, or so Nikola thought. After all, not even the most chemically enhanced fruit and vegetables could stay fresh for this long.

"Like?" Dimitri asked.

"I don't know… goats, maybe?" Nikola had heard once that even lactose intolerant people could drink goat milk.

But that was neither here nor there. He needed something that would eat all the food and then be turned into meat.

He liked goat meat better than pork.

"You know, pigs are also very clean animals," Dimitri told him, as he picked up the new crate and finally cleared a path to the dimension. "Come now! Before the path gets closed again!"

Nikola rushed through the door, Dimitri close behind him.

Only to see crates with food being stacked as far as the eye could see.

"Mr. Octopus!" Nikola yelled.

This was madness!

Did the creature really think that they could eat it all? And how was the produce even growing so quickly?

"Yes?" The octopus patted Nikola on the head with a tentacle. Nikola shuddered.

It was weird.

"Please, stop picking the produce! We don't have any more space!"

The octopus let out a snort, only to show him a tree.

"Then stop making it regrow this quickly! What am I supposed to do? Let it spoil?"

"Just how did the goblins get to the mountain and out? This worker has farmed enough to end world hunger!" Dimitri exclaimed.

"And we are going to donate most of the food," Nikola had no illusions that he would need a huge goat herd if he wanted all the food to be eaten.

"I have a better idea," Dimitri said, as he took Nikola's hand in his and scratched him on the palm.

"Hey!" Nikola yelped, but he couldn't get his hand free.

"We are going to deliver these foodstuffs to friends of mine! Just let your mana out, so it can soak up in the fruit and vegetables!"

Nikola's eyes widened.

Offer food to vampires? Vampires who had a lot of time to get money.

"Tax months will be hell this year," Nikola murmured. He had not gotten even a single bill from his guests.

How was he supposed to file his taxes?

"Tax month? You are officially dead, dear," Dimitri said with a chuckle. "The dead don't pay taxes."

"Not to humans, no," the octopus added. "But he will still need to register in the Undead Syndicate. They take 30%. Good luck filling all that food."

Nikola blinked. The undead had a… tax organization?

"I will handle his taxes," Dimitri said, as he scratched Nikola on the hand one more time. "Besides, if you buy art, then you can be exempt from taxes."

Nikola blinked once more. People could still be tax evaders, even when they were undead.

"The world is strange," Nikola said, as he finally took his hand from Dimitri's grip.

"No shit," the octopus told him, as he pointed at the food forests with a tentacle. "You are a druid who is now a farmer. I bet that I am just a farmhand, when in reality I am one of the harbingers of the world's end. What is normal about that?"

Nikola sighed. He didn't feel like protesting.

"The food goes to the vampires," Dimitri said, as he began to walk towards the mountain range. "And the octopus stays as a farmhand."

The octopus began to pick the produce again. Nikola saw as it began to grow even faster.

"And we will get some goats, right?" Nikola was still hopeful.

Goat milk was his favorite. Goat cheese was to die for.

"Sure, if you want them," Dimitri said, as they finally exited the clearing where the food crates were being stacked in the shapes of Egyptian Pyramids.

They followed a paved path. Soon, they were before a mine shaft which had the same problem as the food clearing.

There was no entering the mine. There were too many crates stacked in front of it.

Dimitri took a mana crystal and the began to squeeze it.

"Ok, Niki, I think I know what to do with this," he said, as he pocketed the crystal.

"Do you mind telling me what these things do?"

"Oh? They are good crystals for blessings. You know, the basic stuff: health, joy, a good family. They are all bright pink. That makes them good."

Nikola nodded. Glad that he wasn't going to be contributing to someone getting cursed.

"So, we are going to sell them to every occult shop that is willing to take them. You can leave this to me."

Nikola nodded. Dimitri liked to help him a lot. The brunette went to the blonde and draped himself over him.

"I love you, you know that?" Nikola asked, as he buried his nose in Dimitri's nape.

"How did I steal your heart so fast?" Dimitri teased, but he returned the hug.

"By being your awesome supporting self," Nikola told him.

He didn't know how someone who had done a break and entering in his old apartment had gotten to be so important to him, but he knew one thing:

If he had to face eternity, then he wanted Dimitri to be by his side.

For the man loved him and was loved back.