Chapter 17 Some Truths are Hard to Hear

The reprieve of my bed only lasted about another hour, then a knock on the door woke me from my slumber. I slowly made my way to the door to find a panic stricken, panting, Gisele leaning on her knees. As the door opened she popped to full attention and her eyes began to water, "Thank goodness. One of the companies in your building reached out to me today and told me you didn't come to work. I was worried something had happened."

I looked at her and waved her inside before I shut the door. I walked over and dropped myself onto the center of my couch. I patted the cushion on my right side and waited for her to take the seat offered to her. she sat down and I laid down in her lap.

"Thank you for coming to check on me. It really means a lot," I told her glossing over the fact that she was still keeping tabs on me. Mostly because despite the fact that I knew it was over bearing and I should find it creepy, I found it comforting and reassuring, "Last night was just a lot and I felt burned out. That's all. Sense you're here can I ask a question? I won't be mad if you decide not to answer it after ask. I'll assume that just means it's already in your plan and I'll wait with as much patients as I can muster."

"Is it about what Harper told you last night?" She asked and I nodded instantly, "All of them. I slept with all of them. I was not a good person, Julia. I thought one beautiful person was the same as every other beautiful person and if we wanted to make each other feel good there was no reason not to. If they had a social hang up about dating or marriage or whatever I would give them what they needed on the service to have one more toy in my toy box. Harper favors herself as straight, but has only ever had threesomes. The third is always a girl and she alone is expected to satisfy the man. So I let her have that whenever she found someone I wanted to play with. I'm sorry I didn't know, not only had I never been in love, but I had never met anyone who had been. I suppose the only other question you might have is why surround myself with people like that now? Two reasons actually, sense I was young I have built a playground filled with the most beautiful toys and now they're the only friends I have. Two I told them I was done with that world, but we could still be friends if they could accept you and the new me. Most of them are not near as degenerate as I was so I figure it just might work. If not well you see were Lucas is at now. I hope that eases your mind, but if this is the thing that makes you turn away from me... I would get it anyways. I don't know what I would do if I found out you were giving out your love like candy on Halloween."

"So that's why you want to take things slow. To prove to yourself and your friends that you're not just maneuvering me to be one of your toys? I take it many of them assume I'm setting the pace of our relationship and you'll come back to them when you get what you want. Maybe they even think it will end like one of those cheesy porns where the little virgin ends up completely corrupted getting gangbanged in public," I stifled a chuckle before continuing, "What will you do if you end up with no friends left?"

I waited for her to answer but she just stroked my hair and let me rest. When it became clear she either couldn't or wouldn't answer my question I began to speak again, "So what do you have planned today. I've already taken the day off can you stay for a while?" I asked, trying to cover the uneasy feeling growing in my heart. It wasn't just the clear revelation of the fact that my girlfriend had slept with everybody in her social circle, but this eerie silent treatment that had followed this confession.

Finally she spoke, "1263," was what she chose to say and my face contorted into a mix of confusion and unease, because I was pretty sure I knew what she was saying.

"Uh," was my attempt at feigning ignorance.

"That's how many different sexual partners I've had sex with. After I turned eighteen, before that I just considered experimentation and didn't count. It also doesn't count people who turned me off before we had sex. Also I'm 26 if that helps put it into perspective. I get it you knew I was promiscuous, but to hear it quantify like this has to be different. If you're disgusted by me I get it."

She must have felt me tense as she clarified and hearing how she had interpreted my reaction made me more than a little sad. I wrapped my arms around her squeezing tight, "You silly little girl. I was jealous so many people got to be with you before me and I was flattered that you who had surrounded yourself with so many beautiful people would chose to be with me and me alone. I love you."

She continued to stroke my hair and I fell into a restful slumber. Learning about my exotic beauty was exhausting. Still I couldn't wait to see what was next.