Chapter 18: Possessive Insane Delusional
I held him like he was made of glass.
No—not glass.
Porcelain. Something beautiful, cold, and delicate, cracked along every edge but still unbearably perfect. Arin, in my arms, his head tucked into the crook of my neck, his breath shallow against my throat. His hair smelled like antiseptic and winter wind.
His face had lost its color.
I had never seen him look this fragile.
My arms were tight around his body. Maybe too tight. I didn't care. I needed to feel that he was still there, still breathing. If I let go, even for a second, it felt like he might vanish—and I would shatter.
All day I hadn't let anyone near him. Not the nurses, not the doctors. Not even the guards who looked at me with suspicion. I didn't care.
They could call me insane. Possessive. Delusional.
Let them.
I held him and whispered things only he could hear.
"You're going to be okay. You hear me? You don't get to die. You promised you'd protect me, idiot. You can't break that promise."
I kissed his forehead. Then his temple. Then the tip of his nose.
His lips.
Cold.
I hated that they were cold.
My tears had dried by now, but the ache inside me was worse than anything I had ever felt. I had seen death. I had tasted blood. But watching him lay here like this, knowing it was because of me...
God. It was killing me.
I didn't even hear the door open.
I only looked up when I felt the air shift.
It was him. Arin's father.
He stood at the entrance like a shadow stretched too long, his coat dark, his eyes darker. And then he saw us—saw me holding his son like he was something sacred.
I expected him to lash out.
But he only smirked.
He gestured with a flick of his hand. "Come."
I hesitated. I didn't want to let go. I kissed Arin's cheek one last time, whispered, "Don't wake up until I'm back."
Then I followed the devil.
---
He took me to a side room. It was colder there. Sharper. Like it had been built for war, not comfort.
He poured himself a drink. Didn't offer me one.
"You love him," he said simply.
I didn't answer.
He turned, glass in hand. "You love him, and yet... you're the one who put him in that bed."
I clenched my fists. "I never wanted him to get hurt."
"But he did. Because of you."
My stomach twisted.
"You think you can protect him," he continued. "But I have all the evidence. The poison, the men, the link to Silas. He orchestrated this to hurt you. And he used my son to do it."
"I have all details about your fuked up life" he add.
My breath caught.
"I can stop Silas," he said. "I can erase him from existence. I have the power. The reach. You? You have... Nothing just your love and desperation."
He stepped closer.
"Let him go. Let Arin come back to his world—the world he was trained for. Alone. Cold. Untouchable. Let him be what he needs to be to survive."
I shook my head. "He was surviving. Not living."
His voice sharpened. "Love will only destroy him."
"Then let it," I snapped. "Let me destroy him if it means he knows what it's like to be held. To be wanted. To be human."
His eyes narrowed. "If you really love him, you will leave."
He stepped forward, voice low. "You want him safe? Walk away. I will protect him. Shield him from Silas. From harm. From even a scratch. But only if you disappear cuz if you don't these things will keep happening this time it was his luck maybe next time he actually die."
My legs felt weak.
Die? He will die ?
Leave him?
Leave the boy who clung to me in his sleep? Who tried to cook terrible eggs just to see me smile? Who kissed me like I was made of stars, not scars?
I wanted to scream.
Instead, I whispered, "You can't protect his heart."
He stared.
I went on. "You can guard his body. But his heart? That's mine. Whether I stay or go, it's already too late. He gave it to me."
Silence stretched between us.
He drank. Then said, coldly, "You have one night."
I didn't reply.
I turned and walked back to the room where my whole world lay broken.
I curled back into bed beside him, wrapped him in my arms.
And cried.
Because I had no idea if I could survive the sunrise.
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