I Escaped the Illusion by Slapping Myself. Twice. And Then Things Got Worse.
Vel'ara's fingers trailed over my chest, steam rising from her touch like a fire slowly licking its meal. Behind her, Qing'er lounged in silk, offering me grapes I didn't remember asking for. Lan Ruo sat with her robe slightly off her shoulder, polishing a sword that definitely wasn't metaphorical.
Even Yao Xinyi was there, combing her hair with a comb made of white bone.
"We're yours now," she whispered, lips brushing my ear.
I blinked.
"Okay. No. This is fake. This is so fake."
Qing'er leaned closer. "Does it matter if it feels good?"
"It always matters!" I shouted. "Also, none of you would be this nice to me at the same time. Especially you," I added, pointing at illusion-Yao.
She winked.
Yeah, definitely fake.
---
[SYSTEM WARNING]
> Lotus Illusion Trial: Mental Pressure Rising
Host Sanity: 62%
Options:
a) Submit to Desire
b) Invoke Bloodline
c) Slap Yourself Very, Very Hard
---
I stood up in the illusion hot spring. Water dripped from my robes like I was in a tragic romance novel. I took a deep breath.
Then I slapped myself.
SMACK.
Illusion-Qing'er gasped.
Another slap. SMACK.
Illusion-Yao raised an eyebrow. "Kinky."
Then the illusion cracked, the walls of desire shattering like glass under pressure.
---
[SYSTEM – Illusion Broken]
> Sanity Restored: 100%
Mental Fortitude +1
New Trait Gained: [Painfully Self-Aware]
Title Earned: [The Guy Who Slaps Himself in Hot Springs]
---
Reality came back like a punch.
I collapsed on the cold stone floor of the trial chamber. Breathing hard. Slightly dizzy. Slightly aroused. Mostly disappointed in myself.
Zhao Feng lay next to me on the floor, blinking calmly.
"You too, huh?"
"Yup."
"Let me guess," I said. "Illusion of people begging you to lead them?"
"Worse. A sincere compliment from my father." He shuddered. "Nightmare fuel."
---
Lan Ruo and Qing'er were still trapped in their illusions, twitching slightly. I reached toward them—but a soft breeze passed my ear.
A shadow dropped into the room.
Robe. Mask. Blade. Intent to kill.
The assassin.
---
He struck with no words—his blade a flash of poisoned steel aimed at my throat.
Zhao Feng's ice spear intercepted mid-air, deflecting it with a ring of frost.
"Try again, emo ninja."
The assassin snarled. "I've come for the Dragonborn."
"That's me," I said, standing. "At least buy me dinner first."
He vanished.
Reappeared behind me.
I barely turned in time—he was fast. Trained. Too fast.
"Crimson Veil failed," he growled. "The Blood Moon failed. But I won't."
I caught his wrist. "What the hell is the Blood Moon?"
"You don't remember. That's the point. The purge erased you."
My stomach dropped. "What purge?"
He yanked away, throwing a black talisman toward Qing'er's pod.
Boom—
Zhao Feng flash-stepped and caught it midair, freezing it solid.
"Try that again and I'll freeze your kidneys one by one."
---
I activated Dragonfire Pulse, following his spiritual trail mid-blink and slamming my fist straight into his chest.
BOOM.
He hit the wall. Hard.
Zhao Feng pinned him down. "Who sent you?"
The assassin smirked through bloodied lips.
"I walk in the shadow of the Veil. I follow the Star that Fell."
He whispered something in a forgotten tongue.
Then burst into flames.
A suicide rune. Of course.
---
Silence.
Lan Ruo and Qing'er finally stirred from the illusions, groggy but whole.
Qing'er sat up, confused. "Did we win?"
"No," I muttered. "But we didn't die. So… points for that."
---
[SYSTEM UPDATE]
> Trial Cleared: Infernal Bloom Nest
Bonus Unlocked: Clue Fragment – [The Purge of the Dragonborn]
Hidden Name Detected: The Star That Fell
New Objective: Uncover Purge Origins
Party Bond: +5% (Yao Xinyi remains emotionally unavailable)
Zhao Feng Affinity: +20% (for 'not being totally useless')
---
That night, we camped under the shimmerleaf trees. The lotus had crumbled. The guardian vanished. But something stayed in the air—something old, and watching.
Zhao Feng sat on a boulder, chewing jerky.
"So. Someone wiped your memory, erased your past, and now they're sending assassins with poetic death threats."
"Yup."
"Nice. You're basically a walking plot twist."
---
Yao Xinyi sat beside me without a word. She handed me a silver token, inscribed with jagged runes and ancient dragon characters.
"This came from one of the pre-purge Dragonborn sects. It's called Heaven's Maw. They might have answers."
"Or more assassins."
"Both, probably." She stood. "But they're expecting you."
Then she turned, paused...
And whispered:
"Next time... don't slap yourself so hard. It leaves a mark."
Then she walked off like she hadn't just emotionally uppercut me.
---
Zhao Feng gave me a slow, painful look.
"You're into her."
"I'm not!"
"You slapped yourself out of a dream to get back to her faster."
"…Shut up."
---
To Be Continued.
---
Author's Note:
🔥 Rewritten for more flow, sass, and punch.
Dragonborn history is finally uncoiling
Heaven's Maw is next—new trials, characters, and Silent Saintess