Chapter 11 Noodles First, Then Banquet

After the room fell silent, Brother Zhou declared harshly: "They must pay for this!"

Lord Wu had been quiet, but seeing Brother Zhou's expression, he spoke: "I don't want revenge. I provoked them first. Let bygones be bygones—if we meet again, they might not act like this." Lord Wu truly let things go—worthy of his title.

"Leave this to me. You getting bullied in this city is an insult to me," Brother Zhou said resolutely. We didn't argue further.

Xiaohua left the hospital after one day. Many visited—friends and strangers. Importantly, Yang Wei (the beauty) came too; we learned her name through chatting.

Lord Wu had the worst injuries, but maybe he was used to beatings—he recovered quickly. Xiaohua, with his bulk, healed even faster. Me? Skinny as I was, it took a week. Why was I so fragile?

I'd never fought before—I was a good student! Thinking of this warmed my heart. Where else could you find such a good student? (众人唾沫都打到我脸上,我也不容易啊!自恋一下都不让)

We didn't miss much class. It was Friday afternoon—Marxist Basic Philosophy, a course few understood. Why did nurses need to learn this and Deng's theories?

Lord Wu and Xiaohua were MIA. The teacher ranted passionately, but most of us were dozing, except for QQ addicts whose phones "dippedi" constantly.

The teacher seemed used to it. I missed high school teachers who'd scare you awake or confiscate novels. When calling on students by number, my number was safe—unless the teacher was feeling mean. Those called gave vague answers like "maybe" or "perhaps."

I woke as the teacher finished, telling us to review while she paced. Nap lovers know: you sleep soundly when teachers talk, but wake when they stop.

Next to me, Chuanchuan played on his phone, Shunzi studied, Little Di discussed philosophy with the teacher, and Mouse flirted with girls— 鄙视!

Sneaking out during her back turn, I headed for the toilet (a post-nap must). First time in the teaching building toilet—I usually used the dorm's. Still groggy, I saw a sign saying "拉" (pull). "Dumb," I thought, but later realized it meant "flush."

Refreshed, I returned to the dorm for more sleep—Marxism induced drowsiness. Waking hungry, I begged: "Anyone got food?"

"Half a 馒头 from lunch," Little Di offered.

"Got instant noodles, but from last month," Chuanchuan said.

"Instant noodles! Got hot water?"

"Used it to wash my hair."

"Please borrow some from next door, bro." Chuanchuan left promptly.

"Sometimes, 美男计 (pretty boy trick) works..." I said. Little Di and Shunzi pretended to vomit.

Chuanchuan returned, zipping his pants.

"Where's the water?"

"Oops! I went to pee..."

I was speechless.

"Please, go borrow water!"

"Why me?"

"Because you're handsome! As monitor, you should help in need—you're the Party's reserve force, son of the people... In short, you must go—it's in line with the 'Three Represents'!"

"Fine! Stop lecturing—you're Tang Sanzang reborn!"

My rhetoric worked. Ten minutes later, I finished the noodles. Just as I lay down, Lord Wu called:

"We're at a restaurant. Come—thanking Sister Lan and her dorm."

I exploded: "Why didn't you call earlier? I just ate instant noodles!"

Grabbing my coat, I raced out. Though full, this meal was a must—meat and time with Dong Yulan's dorm, including Yang Wei. Excited, I quickened my pace.

Out the gate, I realized I didn't know the location. "Old place!" Lord Wu said. I headed to Home-Style Cuisine, one step per second...

We'd eaten here a few times. The madam greeted me warmly: "Welcome! They're on the second floor, room 208, the biggest one." I dashed up the stairs.

Pushing open the door, I saw Little J, Brother Zhou, Lord Wu, and Xiaohua—apparently they'd met at the internet café.

"Where is everyone else?" I asked.

"Who? Your Sister Lan? Relax, they're not here yet," Xiaohua teased.

I sat down. After a while, Little J said: "Call and ask where they are. Inviting them to dinner, and they're late—what an attitude!"

Lord Wu called, then said: "They'll be here soon."

"Waitress! Order!"

A girl with loose hair, medium height, and a student's look entered, staring blankly.

"Excuse me, is this—"

Lord Wu cut her off: "Yes. Take this menu and start cooking—now!" He handed her a pre-written menu.

She was clearly new, reaching for it then pulling back: "Actually, I—"

Little J snapped: "Hurry up! Stop dawdling!"

I felt bad—being a waiter was tough; I'd done it. "Don't be so hard on her," I said.

They scoffed. Suddenly, a familiar voice barked: "Who's a waitress? Watch what you say!"

Dong Yulan (I promised not to call her "Rough Girl" anymore) stood there. The five of us froze—we'd mistaken their friend for a waitress. With Dong Yulan, we were dead meat.

"I'm so unlucky! I was just trying to help..."

"Open your eyes—this is my dormmate!" She entered with a group, including Yang Wei.

Used to her sarcasm, Lord Wu ushered them to sit. We called a real waitress, ordered two dozen Yanjing beers.

"Let me start," Lord Wu said. "Fill all glasses. We've planned this for days to thank Dong Yulan for helping us. First round—guys drink up, ladies optional." He downed his glass.

Dong Yulan blushed: "It was nothing." Hard to believe she could be shy—probably not with me, though. We drank; one girl matched us—Han'er, the one we'd mistaken for a waitress. So bold—my type!

"These are our next-dorm buddies, Little J and Brother Zhou," Lord Wu introduced. They smiled awkwardly.

Dong Yulan quipped: "More like birds of a feather." Everyone laughed but me—I was immune.

"Now, meet my dormmates," Dong Yulan said. "This is Yang Wei." Yang smiled—cute, but something seemed off.

"This is Han'er, who you thought was a waitress." Han'er looked friendly, though "cute" didn't show.

"That's Ye Zi."

Ye Zi? My high school deskmate had the same name. "You look familiar—like a star I loved as a kid!"

She blushed: "Which one?" Everyone stared.

"The one from old TV shows..."

Lord Wu snapped: "Spit it out!"

I laughed: "Huluwa!" Everyone except Ye Zi burst out laughing. Dong Yulan called me "incapable of saying anything nice."

"Look at her eyes—just like!" I said.

They agreed: "Actually, yeah!"

Little J joked: "Then my eyes are like Huluwa too!" Thus, "Brother Hulu" was born. Lord Wu later teased Little J about being adopted. Dong Yulan introduced others: Bian'er, Taozi, Jinzi—forgettable types. Their dorm nicknames were bland, unlike ours: Cai Cai, Xiaohua, Little Di, Mouse—easy to remember.

We didn't drink much, but the girls took turns toasting us. Han'er, an 东北 (Northeastern) girl, drank the most without a hitch—she'd been drinking since childhood.

Leaving the restaurant, we were tipsy. October weather was nice—fresh air, warm sun. Many exercised on the playground, few studied.

"Great day for the internet!" Lord Wu woke me up the next morning.

"Can you do something besides surfing?" Chuanchuan chided.

"I'm not surfing, I'm browsing loneliness," Lord Wu said dramatically.

Xiaohua deadpanned: "Pretentious!"

Off to the internet café—all except Shunzi and Chuanchuan joined, plus Brother Hulu and Zhou. We raided snack stalls on the way, sharing breakfast under the sunrise—a unique sight.