Chapter 20

Apple cider vinegar coats my fingers. Each filthy whiff of wild boar etched the memory deeper into my mind’s eye, a replay of my broken promise, of the life I took.

My body bursts with emotion. Too much to bear.

I need to see Varujan again. I need to get back to The Shade.

I grab my bag.

* * *


Up at the Varig café, I call Mom and unload.

“That’s horrible,” she says. “I’ve been talking to Doc about it, and she says you should stand your ground regarding your father. Just try not to lose your temper.”

“Mom, it’s not that. It doesn’t matter what I say or how I say it. He wants me to be something I’m not.” A couple of bees zip through the air above my table. I envy their freedom. “I killed an animal today. That is not okay.”