THE BROKEN PROMISE

How in the teletubby-pink-sludge fuckery did this even happen? 

Mattias had plenty to think about. Lamentations fell in lockstep with frustration and uncertainty. That… that was… fuck. Even now, as he lay in somber silence with Cifer's natural heat shielding them from the cold, his mind was racing. Catastrophic 'what-ifs' plagued his brain—what if Lev sent someone to check on them? And Cifer, what if he woke up and discovered he'd scented Matt like this while he was intoxicated? What would he do? 

The blockers, clogging in his system though they may still be, weren't enough to drown out the other alpha's lingering pheromones on his skin. Those brief, light, would-he-won't-he, pseudo fucking kisses made Matt feel as though Cifer's fleeting touch had stained him. Were it not for that familiar scent kicking up every time Matt moved, he might have thought he'd hallucinated the whole thing. Thankfully, Cifer seemed exhausted beyond all measure and he'd eventually gotten up, shut off the lights, then returned and shifted into a sleeping position. 

Nothing Cifer said or did made any sense. It's like there was some kind of raging tempest of unimaginable destruction brewing just under the surface. A surface that was pristine, if not deceptive, in its even outer appearance. 

Fingers hovered over the heavy, muscled arm that draped itself over his waist; yet they hesitated to make contact. Cifer's steady, hot breath against the back of his neck was bordering on too much—this man was still a fucking traitor. Confusion, tension, or whatever else have-you, Matt needed to kill him and fly back to America before the Kremlin could step in. 

He needed to stop this nonsense. To peel his back away from where it plastered against Cifer's front. Powerful muscle rose and fell with each lumbering breath, shifting Matt's perspective and skewing it beyond what was actually necessary. Cifer was sleeping. The chances of successfully killing him right here, right now, may be low as hell, but that shouldn't stop him from at least looking for the larger man's weaknesses. 

That's right—there has to be some kind of opening he can study, instead of just sitting here and trying to figure out why the fuck Cifer was touching him like—

The blond man tugged Matt even closer, nuzzling his nose against the back of his neck. It spooked him, but beyond that, it was so irrationally familiar that Mattias swallowed a silent laugh. 

Some things apparently never change. 

… § … 

Matt was angry. About a lot of things. Mostly the nanny—or was she some kind of headmistress? He didn't know, and to be quite frank, he didn't care. After that fiasco on the beach, that evil woman had punished them both for a month. A whole month! No playing outside, no spending time with the others, nothing. Worst of all, she put a new rule in place. It's a rule that, no matter how hard he tries, he just can't get himself to accept. 

Cifer was prohibited from being alone with, near, or spending too much time in the same room as Matt. 

It made him feel sick. Yeah, he gets it. Cifer grabbed her. Matty still didn't understand why he'd done something so astronomically stupid—even for him. Don't get him screwy; Cifer wasn't an unintelligent boy, not by a long shot. He was just clever in all the ways the adults hated most. The new rule forced Cifer to sleep in the row opposite Matt's. 

It made him feel sick. And lonely. Like he'd lost something precious he hadn't known he had until it was gone. 

The dark-haired boy clawed at his thin blankets and buried his face a little deeper under his pillow. Normally, he'd sleep on top of it like a normal person, but these days, he was too upset. He'd rather use it to hide his runaway expressions when silence filled the space, and he had no familiar presence behind him to ease his horrible mind. 

Tonight isn't any different. Things felt emptier without Cifer. He hated it more than anything else in this world. His neck hurt from not using his pillow properly and ugly circles had formed under his eyes from not getting any sleep for the last couple of weeks. But it was too late now. What's done is done. 

Eyes shut painfully tight, Matt fell into an uncomfortable trance that was nothing akin to real sleep. And for a while, he stayed like that, stifled with pillow air and uncomfortable. Until he felt Giovanni shift behind him. Dang, did he wake the boy? Gio's move placed their beds together, while Cifer was now across the aisle.

Mattias held his breath even more. The last thing he wanted to do was keep Gio up along with him. But what he wasn't expecting was a familiar, sleek body pressing itself against his back. He'd just lifted the pillow to breathe when a fairly big hand came to cover his mouth. Peering over his shoulder, Matt's eyes blew up bigger than Nan's had the moment Cifer had grabbed her. 

Cifer Calaway adjusted his position to avoid being seen by whoever was making rounds that night. The boy held a lopsided, arrogant smirk that made him look prettier than it rightly should have. He was shifting himself so he was lower against Matt's body, obviously trying to hide his height. Like he'd done for years. Confused, yet deeply relieved and plagued by a racing heartbeat, Matt looked back toward the door and adjusted his pillow. 

He moved it half under his head and half tilted so it could be under Cifer's. Waiting impatiently, once Cifer got comfortable, the boys used both their blankets to help hide what had happened. 

"... Hey, Princess," Cifer whispered against the back of his neck as he released his hand from Matt's mouth.

It sent soothing shivers down his spine. 

"What are you doing? Where's Gio?" 

"Bribed him at dinner with an extra pudding cup. Genius, huh?"

"... And he let you?"

"Yeah."

Matt scrunched up his face, lips pouting. "How come? You're terrible to him, you jerk."

Warm puffs of silent laughter caused him to squirm with an unseen, ticklish delight. 

"Anyone and their mother can see you're upset. Even Gio noticed. So. You know. Wasn't that hard. Kid might be an egghead, but being smart is worth something. Sometimes. I guess."

"You're the literal worst," Matt replied. His eyes wrinkled with a gentle smile as he felt himself easing into the familiar, innocent position. "Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure. Lay it on me."

"What were you thinking?!"

A brief pause let his comment ruminate. 

"... About what?"

"Oh my god, Cifer. On the beach. You grabbed her. She looked so mad. I just… it made everything worse. And now, you—we—"

"Hey. Breathe," Cifer said, his arm snaking under the blankets to drape over Matt's waist; "it's fine. I'm here now, ain't I?" 

There was something so unusually tender about the way Cifer spoke to Matt whenever they were like this that the boy's eyes came fluttering closed. Matt's chest rose and fell in a calmer fashion as he focused on the strangely safe warmth he got from the moment. 

Cifer was never like this with anyone else. He only expressed this gentle side of his when everyone else was asleep, and he whispered his day against the back of his neck. 

"Why, though?" 

"... You're real hung up on this, huh?"

"Yeah. So just… tell me why you grabbed her already."

"Fine, but when I do, you gotta promise not to freak out. Okay?"

"I–"

Ugh. Those promises were so hard to keep. His smaller hands clawed at the old mattress under them, eyes narrowing while they did. 

"I won't freak out."

"You better not." Cifer's body shifted as though saying this aloud was akin to pulling teeth. "I did it cause she was gonna hurt you, Matty."

The tension in his shoulders wound up his body like a music box on the verge of snapping apart. 

"What?"

Half-hearted shrugging against his back did nothing to make him feel better. 

"I said what I said. She was gonna hurt you. I know more stuff about it than you do. So I grabbed her to get her attention and give you a chance to run."

"... You—wait, if she was gonna hurt me, and you—"

Matt's lungs seized before he could finish his sentence.

"Hey. You promised not to freak out, remember?"

Soft-spoken words broke whatever spell held power over his breath; "how bad is it?"

"Just a scratch. Nothin' to get all pissy about."

"Don't lie to me—"

Cifer's body grew taut against him. "I ain't a liar!"

"... Okay. Say I believe you. How come you never said anything to me before?"

"Cause it didn't matter. I can take a few knocks. I'm an alpha."

The way he rolled his eyes ended up being a full body experience. "Says you. You haven't presented yet."

"C'mon, Princess. Look at me. Am I gonna be anything else~?"

Cifer had him there. Lips pursed into a thin, worried line, Mattias' hand clawed into the mattress again. He'd done this to protect him? The more he thought about it, the guiltier he felt. Cifer was also terrible when it came to him being sick or hurt. The boy rarely complained, nor spoke about his injuries—let alone allowed himself to be truthful. 

Matt couldn't help himself. 

"It really doesn't hurt?"

Another small bout of silence followed his question, and Matt's teeth met with a quiet click. 

"It doesn't."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

His body finally relaxed again, fingers detangling themselves from the suffering sheets.

"Damn, Princess. You're really worried about me, huh? That's real cute."

Matt brought his elbow back against Cifer's chest, earning him another grunt and more stifled laughter to spread frustratingly sedating air down his back. 

"Shut up. No I'm not."

"Whatever you say."

His eyes felt heavier than they had in a long time. They fell with a purpose as the tendrils of sleep began kissing his cheeks. 

"... Don't do that again," Matt said. 

"What are you on about now?"

"Protect me. Without tellin' me what you're doing. And tell me if something's gone wrong. Especially if you're hurt. Don't lie to me anymore, kay?"

The silence was deafening. He squirmed, face scrunching up at how aggravating it was. 

"Cifer—"

"Okay, okay."

"Promise me."

"Again?"

His elbow found the larger boy's ribs this time. 

"Yes!"

Cifer grunted and shifted the arm around Matt to rub at the newly sore spot. "God, you're such a girl about this. I promise I won't protect you without telling you what I'm doing."

"And?"

"... And I'll tell you if something's wrong with me."

A hefty grudge tainted his faint words, yet they soothed Mattias's ache enough to allow the tendrils to work. 

"... Good. You better keep your promise, or else."

"Ha! Or else, what? You gonna hit me? Can you even reach?"

"You're such a jerk," the boy said. Mumbled, partially slurred huffing escaped him, though he hardly realized it had.

Finally, after spending so many nights restless and feeling alone, Mattias was falling asleep. Inoffensive fingers found their way back over Matt's waist as they tugged him closer to Cifer's warmth. 

The blond said something under his breath, and its tickle kept Matt awake long enough to catch the tail end of it. 

"—g'night, Matt."

"Night, Cifer," he murmured in reply as the sweet respite of slumber embraced him. Not as gently as Cifer was, but gently enough.