The Question that cut deep

At the convenience store, Ms. Orlah couldn't focus. Her body ached from juggling multiple jobs, her mind was stretched thin trying to play both mother and father to Ixora, and her heart was heavy watching her daughter suffer for something she had no memory of.

She pitied Ixora. The girl deserved better.

I tried so hard to give her a comfortable life, Orlah thought, to be the best mother and friend she could ever have. I didn't want that emptiness in her life to be real. I worked so hard to fill it… but maybe it was always going to catch up with us.

Her thoughts drifted, uninvited, to that fifth of January—a date seared into her memory, still vivid like it happened yesterday. The day her one-year-old marriage crumbled without warning. The day she was forced into single motherhood without preparation or support.

The pain still felt fresh. The sting of rejection. The helplessness. The tears that almost turned into rivers.

I wanted to give my children everything I never had. But somehow… it turned out worse.

At least I had a father. And siblings. Even when food was scarce, we laughed. We made jokes until sleep carried us away.

But Ixora?

She had no father to shield her. No siblings to play with. Just me.

What a lonely life my daughter must be living…

A gentle nod from her colleague, Ms. Eunice, brought her back to the present. Ms. Orlah looked to Ms. Eunice, She patted her shoulder and whispered softly,

"It's gonna be okay someday."

Ixora's POV

Mom wasn't home—again. Not that it was new.

I didn't really have friends in school. But don't get me wrong, I'm not some weird loner or anything. I just didn't see the point in getting too close to people. One day, they just disappear, like they were never even there to begin with.

From my bedroom window, I looked down and saw a few of my classmates hanging out. There she was—the ever-cheerful girl, always surrounded by her wild duo: Ketora and Kendra. They called themselves ZKK. Everyone in school admired them. Honestly? They were really pretty and always seemed so… happy.

The three of them sat on a roadside bench, laughing about something I couldn't quite hear. I watched for a moment… then decided to go join them. Maybe we could talk about college—we were all enrolling soon anyway.

As I walked over, Kendra noticed me first.

"Hey, Ixora," she smiled.

"Hey," I replied, smiling back and greeting the others.

We started talking—about college, the new classrooms, the hot guys we might meet, and everything else that came with starting that next chapter. For once, I felt like I belonged.

Then, out of nowhere, Ketora blurted:

"I noticed you didn't join us for the candle-lighting ritual."I paused. My heart dipped just slightly.

I looked into her big brown eyes. She looked… concerned. Genuinely.

"I'm fine," I said, trying to sound casual. "It's a long, boring story. Let me save you the details."

But they weren't convinced. I could feel it—the silent question on all their faces. Then Ketora added the words that hit the hardest:

"I'm pretty sure you didn't light the candle with us because your dad wasn't there. I mean, his seat was empty. He's never been to a PTA meeting. Never shows up for anything at all. So... is he dead, or does he just not care about you?"

Kendra and Zara gasped at the same time, turning sharply toward her.

"Ketora!" they snapped. "Stop!"

But it was too late. Her words had already cut through me like a blade.

I couldn't speak. My lips parted, but nothing came out. The ache in my chest made it hard to breathe.

I forced a smile. "Guys, I think I've got to go now. It was nice talking to you."

Then I turned and walked away—no excuse, no explanation. Just silence.

I ran. Down the alley. Fast. Like I was chasing somewhere the pain couldn't follow. Like I was headed straight to the ends of the earth.

By the time I reached the city aquarium—my secret escape—I was breathless. My chest burned. My heart pounded against my ribs like it wanted out. My pulse thundered in my ears.

But louder than all of it was her voice, echoing in my head:

"Is he dead, or just doesn't care about you?

I took several deep breaths, trying to steady myself, and walked into the aquarium.

Somehow… I smiled. Watching the beautiful creatures of God swim freely, worry-free, calmed me. They lived without expectations. No pressure. No judgment.

I wish I were a goldfish, I thought. They never have to worry about who left them or why they weren't enough.

But then I remembered—they often meet unfortunate ends. Most of them end up in pots.

Yeah… maybe being human isn't so bad.

I watched a particularly calm one swim in circles, its fins like feathers brushing the water. For a second, I imagined my father—what his face looked like, what his voice might have sounded like if he ever called me "baby girl."

What kind of man walks away from his own child?

Maybe he loved his freedom more. Maybe… he just never loved me.

I stayed there until evening, letting the silence cradle me. Then I rushed home to prepare dinner for Mom and me.

She didn't seem herself at dinner. She looked distant. Tired in her soul, not just her body.

I asked what was wrong. She shook her head. "Nothing," she said, but she wouldn't meet my eyes.

I tried to make her laugh. I told her about a meme someone sent in the class group chat. Eventually, she smiled—a soft, tired smile—then pulled me into a tight hug.

"I adore you," she whispered into my hair. "I love you so much, Ixora. Thank you… for being my daughter."

She kissed my forehead gently and whispered,

"Goodnight."

I held onto that moment—like a candle I never lit.

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