Chapter 19: “Ghost Café vs Health Inspector”

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Monday – 9:00 a.m. – Ghost Café

It was a calm, beautiful morning. The kind of morning where sunlight filters through warm glass, croissants are extra flaky, and the air smells like cinnamon and second chances.

Then the door slammed open.

SLAM.

In stormed a tall man in a trench coat, clipboard in hand, sunglasses indoors, with the energy of someone who's never tasted sugar and takes joy in deducting points.

"GOOD MORNING," he barked.

"I am Inspector Kwon from the Seoul Metropolitan Health Department! I am here for your random full inspection."

Dae-Hyun, holding a tray of mini toasts, froze.

"…But… we're a tiny café?"

Kwon adjusted his shades. "I've had complaints. Anonymous."

Min-Ji peeked out from behind the espresso machine and muttered,

"Bet it was that café across the street. The one that charges 9,000 won for air with oat foam."

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9:03 a.m. – The Interrogation Begins

Inspector Kwon circled the café like a hawk with a grudge.

"Too much cozy lighting," he muttered.

"Ambience level dangerously high."

"Customer smiles exceed standard emotional safety limits."

He poked at the dream-note wall.

"These… are unhygienic motivational graffiti."

Dae-Hyun: "They're written on sterilized Post-Its."

"Still dangerously heartfelt."

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9:12 a.m. – The Banana Milk Room Is Discovered

Inspector Kwon opened the back storage door and gasped.

Inside: 500 crates of banana milk, all perfectly stacked like golden bricks.

Kwon spun around.

"What is this?!"

Dae-Hyun panicked.

"That's—uh—our emergency hydration protocol!"

Kwon narrowed his eyes. "Why are they chilled to exact body temperature?!"

"…Therapeutic… latte layering?"

Min-Ji appeared, casually munching a donut.

"Inspector, would you like to try one? For research?"

Kwon blinked. "I do not consume child beverages."

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9:20 a.m. – The Stickie Trap

Kwon tried to investigate further but stepped on something squishy.

The floor in the corner was covered with spilled stickers.

Each note had messages like:

> "You're doing fine."

"Keep breathing, barista warrior."

"Your foamed milk has value."

He looked up, furious.

"This café is… a trap for the emotionally vulnerable!"

Sun-Ho walked in at that exact moment with a tray of flower-shaped macarons.

"I just made these out of gratitude," he said.

Kwon's left eye twitched.

"You… are the barista champion."

Sun-Ho posed dramatically. "I am also the head of latte poetry."

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9:33 a.m. – The Surprise Pop Quiz

Kwon snapped his fingers.

"I demand a spontaneous latte health performance exam. Now."

Sun-Ho whispered, "...What does that even mean?"

Kwon pulled out a thermometer, stopwatch, and… a noise meter?

"You have sixty seconds to prepare a foam design. Sanitize. Steam. Swirl. If I see one sparkle, you're shut down."

Dae-Hyun swallowed hard. "We're done."

Sun-Ho cracked his knuckles. "Hold my oat milk."

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9:34 a.m. – Latte Battle: Civil Service Edition

Sun-Ho poured.

The café held its breath.

Foam danced.

Milk spun.

The cup rotated midair like a ballet solo.

When he stopped, the mug displayed:

A tiny health inspector holding a latte, complete with sunglasses.

Silence.

Kwon leaned in. Sipped.

Then stared at the cup for a long time.

"…Is this… supposed to be me?"

Sun-Ho nodded.

"With extra bitterness."

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9:36 a.m. – The Twist

Suddenly, Inspector Kwon removed his sunglasses.

He sniffled.

"…No one's ever… foamed me before."

Min-Ji whispered, "Is he crying?"

Dae-Hyun whispered back, "I think the milk cracked him."

Kwon cleared his throat.

"I… I used to dream of opening a café. But I failed the barista test five times."

He looked around. The dream notes. The soft lighting. The music.

"…I see now. This is not a health risk."

He stood tall.

"This is… a hope hazard. A good one."

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9:45 a.m. – Inspection Results

Kwon stamped the inspection sheet.

> ✅ "Passed.

Notes: May cause emotional growth.

Recommendation: Serve banana milk to civil servants weekly."

He bowed once.

Then whispered, "If you ever need an undercover cleaner… call me."

And vanished.

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That Night – Rooftop

Dae-Hyun sat with Min-Ji and Sun-Ho, watching the lights below.

"I thought we were done."

"But instead," Min-Ji said, "you healed a health inspector with dairy foam."

Sun-Ho nodded. "You're basically a reverse tax demon."

They all clinked banana milk cans.

> [SYSTEM NOTIFICATION: "You have survived a government encounter. +1 Café Respect Point."]

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End of Chapter 19