The monster without a system

The monster without a system

Fantasy11 Chapters4.0K Views
Author: JuleyNoRead
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in a world where everyone gets a system out dear josen is a defector he gets kicked out of the Malkador family would cast him away to his grandfather who is so a defector, how strong will he grow?

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LEVELSOUL
LEVELSOUL

As an avid reader of web novels and a great admirer of aspiring authors, I find immense joy in witnessing the early stages of a writer’s creative journey. There’s something uniquely special about engaging with the raw beginnings of a dream taking form in prose. I believe in offering honest and constructive feedback. The writing quality, while not polished, holds potential. It is clear that the author possesses a spark, though refinement in structure, tone, and consistency would greatly enhance the overall readability. The pacing of the story feels somewhat rushed, with developments occurring rapidly and without the emotional or narrative build-up that could give the plot greater weight and resonance. It lacks nuance at times, but this is a common challenge in debut works. Character development could benefit from greater depth. While the cast serves the story, their personalities feel underdeveloped, making it harder to form strong connections as a reader. The world-building is minimal at this stage, with much left to the imagination—perhaps too much—but with greater attention to environmental detail and lore, a more immersive setting could emerge. That being said, the author's consistency in updates is commendable and shows dedication, which should never be undervalued. More importantly, it is evident that they are writing with passion, with a story to tell and a dream to pursue. I did not approach this novel expecting perfection. What I found was sincerity, ambition, and promise. It may not be the most refined novel I’ve read, but it is certainly far from the weakest. With continued effort, openness to critique, and a commitment to honing their craft, I have no doubt that this author will grow into a writer of significant capability. And when they do, I will be proud to say I witnessed the very beginning.

15 days ago
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