Training... or Torture in Lip Gloss
They said training would "start gently."
They lied.
Day one: I got dropkicked before breakfast.
"React faster, Rei!" she yelled, flipping me like a pancake onto a mat that smelled like disappointment and lavender perfume.
"I'M TRYING!" I wheezed. "I'M FRAGILE!"
Saya, holding a tablet like an evil schoolteacher, clicked her tongue.
"Your reaction time is slower than my Wi-Fi during a storm."
Meanwhile, Mika was sparring with a hologram of herself… and winning.
Tomo? She wasn't even fighting—just watching me with that quiet judgment, like a cat watching a pigeon stuck in a cereal box.
And then there's Yuna, who casually dropped from the ceiling, landed like a cat, and said,
"You're sweating a lot. That's cute."
Spoiler: it wasn't cute.
It was survival panic.
---
Day three: I made the mistake of asking where the guys' bathroom was again.
"There isn't one," said Saya. "Adapt or explode."
That's when I learned the lock on the bathroom didn't work. Again.
I opened the door once and saw Tomo brushing her teeth.
She stared. I stared.
We didn't speak of it again.
---
Day five: they made me do stealth drills by crawling through the vents.
Do you know what happens when you're crawling through a vent directly above a room full of semi-naked assassins who forgot you exist?
Mortal fear.
I sneezed once. Rei threw a knife at the vent.
It nearly pierced my soul.
---
But hey... I'm not completely useless.
I hit a bullseye during target practice.
With my eyes closed.
Total fluke.
Yuna clapped. Mika called me "half-decent."
Rei didn't insult me for an entire hour.
I think that counts as affection here.
---
I still don't know what kind of crazy fate dumped me into this nightmare of glittery pain, but…
For the first time, I'm starting to think…
Maybe I belong here.
Or maybe I just hit my head too many times.
Either way—I'm not leaving.
Not until I master that triple-flip-spinning-heel-kick that Tomo did in flip-flops.
---
The dojo was quiet—too quiet.
Aside from the faint hum of the lights and the occasional squeak of rubber soles, it felt like the calm before a storm.
Then Yuna walked in.
Tight black leggings, form-fitting top, ponytail swaying like she choreographed it just to ruin my focus.
She tossed a towel over her shoulder and gave me a once-over, her lips curling.
"Ready for close-quarters combat, Jizu?"
She said it with a purr.
The kind that made the back of my neck sweat and the System panic.
---
SYSTEM POP-UP
> ⚠️ Alert: Seduction Level - 67% and rising.
⚠️ User heart rate spiking. Estimated time until nosebleed: 34 seconds.
🔔 System recommends upgrading Mental Fortitude.
➕ Would you like to spend 3 Harem Points to equip 'Serious Mode'?
> ☐ Yes
☑ No (accidentally clicked)
Crap.
---
We began the drill.
She lunged—I blocked.
She spun—I stumbled.
She flipped—I panicked.
One second I was trying to maintain proper footwork, and the next, gravity betrayed me harder than a plot twist in an anime finale.
She ducked low, swept my legs—and I went flying.
And then…
Impact.
---
"Ghh—" I grunted as my back hit the mat.
Right on top of me—Yuna.
And my right hand?
Landed somewhere I didn't even know my soul had permission to touch.
SYSTEM POP-UP
> ❌ Unauthorized Contact Detected.
☢️ Region: Chest — High Sensitivity Zone.
⚡ Emotion Spike Detected: Jizu's embarrassment level critical.
🏆 Achievement Unlocked: "First Contact (and Last, if you die here)"
💥 Yuna's Smirk Level: Ascending
---
I froze.
Yuna didn't.
She blinked once. Looked down. Then back up.
She didn't even flinch.
Instead, she leaned closer, voice low and teasing. "Well, well… weren't we just training?"
"I—It was an accident!" I yelped, pulling back like I'd just touched molten lava. "I swear on my future taxes!"
She cocked her head. "So bold. So fast. Are you trying to skip three arcs of development?"
SYSTEM ANALYSIS
> ☑ Body Contact: 3.7 seconds
☑ Eye Contact: 2.2 seconds
☑ Internal Panic: 9000%
📈 Affection Status: Mildly Amused (Yuna) | Mortified (Jizu)
---
We stood awkwardly.
She dusted herself off, unfazed, and leaned in with a whisper that hit my earlobe like fire.
"Next time," she said, "warn a girl before making a move. I might say yes."
I turned red enough to be used as a road flare.
She winked and walked off, her hips swaying like she was getting the last word—because she always got the last word.
---
I collapsed onto the mat, staring at the ceiling like it held the secrets of the universe.
SYSTEM NOTIFICATION
> 🎯 Quest Progress Updated:
➤ "Train Without Accidentally Groping Teammates" – ❌ Failed
➤ "Survive Training Day With Dignity Intact" – ❌ Failed
➤ "Unlock Harem Route – Yuna Path" – ☑ Triggered
> 📩 Message from Yuna:
"Your reflexes still suck, but your hands are honest. Next time give a girl a heads-up before you make a move" 💋
I screamed into my towel.
---