Things I Wish I Could Say Without Shaking

I'm not your doll, not carved from stone,

not built to suffer all alone.

i breathe, i break, i bleed, i bend

but never once did you defend.

you toss your pain into my chest,

then scoff when i just need some rest.

you call me weak when i cry loud

but silence makes you just as proud.

you mock the way my voice will shake,

you laugh at every scar i make.

you see the smile, but not the scream

you never cared to know the theme.

your love came sharp, like knives in silk,

you sweetened words but soured the milk.

you praised me just to tear me down,

then asked why i still wear a frown.

I'm not your grave to bury guilt,

not scaffolding for all you built.

you took my wings, then cursed the sky

and blamed me when i couldn't fly.

my dreams? you broke them, every one,

then stood and asked why i was done.

you loved me only when you won,

but love like that burns out the sun.

you call me soft? i call it brave.

i bit my tongue and dug my grave.

while you just danced above the dirt,

i wore your hate like it was hurt.

so now i speak....don't turn away.

this time, i'll not let silence stay.

i'm more than strong, more than your pawn—

i'm still alive, though hope is gone.

so let me breathe, just let me feel,

don't tell me what is fake or real.

don't call me "too much" when i cry

just once, sit down and ask me why.

i'm human.

raw.

and full of fire.

don't call that rage

call that desire.