This isn't a Mental Breakdown,Right?!

________

I woke up to a mechanical "DING" so sharp and shrill it felt like my dreams were being evaporated through a sonic cattle prod.

My eyes snapped open. Blank ceiling. Blinking tube light. Same sad walls. The faint smell of wet clothes I forgot to dry.

Again.

I sat up slowly, feeling a strange tingle run down my spine. Not the cool anime protagonist kind. No, this was more of the "you may be having a stroke" flavor.

"That was new," I mumbled.

There was a ringing silence.

Then:

[SYSTEM BOOT COMPLETE.]

[CONNECTION TO PRIMARY USER ESTABLISHED.]

Okay. Breathe.

Breathe.

Laugh nervously.

"Cool, cool, I'm finally losing it," I said to no one. "Text hallucinations. Neat. I always wanted to be one of those tragic indie protagonists who talk to toasters."

"So you still there?", I asked while looking in the air like a deranged mental patient.

[THE SYSTEM IS NOT A TOASTER.]

I froze.

"Okay, but, like… you could be."

[NEGATIVE.]

I stared at the empty space in front of me. There was nothing there. No floating orb. No holographic anime waifu. Just my room. Unwashed clothes. Crumbs on my desk. A crusty coffee mug that had seen the downfall of empires.

"Right, okay. So. I'm awake. I think. Possibly. Maybe not."

[YOU ARE AWAKE. THIS UNIT HAS BEEN ACTIVATED DUE TO EXTERNAL READER INTERVENTION.]

"Reader? Like... someone actually read this mess?"

[AFFIRMATIVE.]

I blinked. The world tilted a little. Someone read the last chapter?

[ONE COMMENT DETECTED.]

"Holy sh—" I slapped my mouth. "I mean. Wow. Okay. So you're saying the hallucination I'm talking to was triggered because a bored demigod on the internet decided to say, 'Yeah, sure, let the toaster talk to the author'?"

[CORRECTION: SYSTEM.]

"Same thing."

[DISAGREE.]

"So you're... real?"

[AFFIRMATIVE.]

"And you're here to help me write stories?"

[CORRECT. THIS SYSTEM IS DESIGNED TO INTERFACE WITH CREATIVE ENTITIES AND ENABLE NARRATIVE DEVELOPMENT BASED ON EXTERNAL INTERACTION PARAMETERS.]

"I swear to god if you say 'exponential narrative scalability' I will unplug my own brain."

[QUERY: IS THIS A FUNCTIONAL THREAT?]

"...No."

I fell backward on my bed and stared at the ceiling again. It hadn't changed. Unlike my sanity levels.

"So what now?"

[DUE TO CONTINUED READER SILENCE, INITIATING BACKUP PLAN.]

"Wait, what silence? You just said someone commented!"

[ONLY ONE COMMENT. SYSTEM JUDGES THIS AS SILENCE WITH EXCEPTION.]

"Harsh."

[CORRECT.]

There was a faint whirring sound. Like a computer booting up. Then a shimmer appeared near the edge of my desk.

From thin air, a holographic screen blinked into view. It looked like a cluttered digital library. Dozens of folders labeled in my chaotic naming conventions:

Wuxia Saga But Cool

Martial Arts World Maybe?

Sword Guy With Trauma

Trash Sect Rebirth 3.0

[SELECTING FILE: " blade master of the flying sword sect"]

"Wait, no, not that one—!"

[TOO LATE.]

"Dangit. That one was all over the place!"

[INITIATING WORLD-INTEGRATION SEQUENCE.]

The screen began shifting through layers of lore I hadn't touched in over a year. Sects, clans, cultivation levels, mysterious treasures, forbidden arts, and at least one talking sword with amnesia.

I remembered spending three days designing a ranking system for martial arts that sounded deep but basically just made a spiral.

[SELECTING PRIMARY POWER SYSTEM: CULTIVATION-BASED WITH SPIRITUAL ARTIFACT HYBRID.]

[ADDITIONAL SYSTEMS ENABLED: DUAL CORE PATHWAY, BLOODLINE LOCKS, ELEMENTAL OVERFLOW, HIDDEN TRIBULATION FLAGS.]

"Okay, now you're just showing off."

[CORRECT.]

"Wait. Are you actually proud of yourself?"

[SYSTEM IS NOT CAPABLE OF PRIDE. BUT READERS MIGHT BE. PLEASE COMMENT, OH MIGHTY ONES.]

Suddenly, the robotic tone dropped a level, shifting to a bright, overly cheery customer service voice.

[Hey there lovely readers~ Just letting you know we're doing our best here in the dark abyss of unappreciated creativity! Even one more comment will save a poor overworked system from falling back into cold narrative slumber~ UwU!]

I gagged.

"Okay. You went from Skinet to social media intern in two seconds. I hate that."

[SYSTEM ACKNOWLEDGES YOUR HATRED.]

"Good."

[BUT THE READERS MATTER MORE.]

"Rude."

[HONEST.]

The screen flickered again, now showing a swirling black void. Text appeared:

[CREATING WORLD CORE...]

[GENERATING MOUNTAIN RANGES: DRAGONBONE SPINE - COMPLETE]

[SPAWNING MAJOR SECTS: SHADOW LOTUS, SKY-FIRE MONASTERY, IRON SCRIPTURE TEMPLE - COMPLETE]

[INSERTING FIRST PROTAGONIST - FAILED. AUTHOR INACTIVE.]

"Wait. You want me to write this?"

[NO. SYSTEM HAS A NEW PLAN.]

[TEMPORARY GODHOOD GRANTED TO PRIMARY USER.]

The room shifted. Not physically, but in feeling. Like the gravity of the space tilted toward me.

"Uh... What does 'temporary godhood' mean?"

[IT MEANS YOU CAN NOW MODIFY THE WORLD FROM WITHIN.]

[PLEASE ENJOY YOUR DIVINE MID-LIFE CRISIS.]

The sarcasm hit harder than my failed career.

"You are enjoying this, aren't you."

[SYSTEM IS INCAPABLE OF ENJOYMENT.]

[ALSO: SYSTEM ENJOYS THIS IMMENSELY.]

I sighed and looked at the glowing screen now showing a wide wuxia-style landscape. Mountains pierced the clouds, rivers glistened like silver threads, and spiritual beasts roamed through dense forests.

My hand twitched. I felt it.

Power.

Possibility.

Panic.

"Wait. I don't know how to be a god! I can barely microwave popcorn without summoning Satan through smoke signals!"

[RELAX. SYSTEM WILL GUIDE YOU. OR WATCH YOU FAIL FOR CONTENT.]

"Thanks. That's... deeply reassuring."

[YOU'RE WELCOME.]

I sat at my desk and looked at the glimmering expanse of the world I'd left unfinished years ago now flickering with life.

My mind buzzed with anxiety. But my heart...

...my heart buzzed with something else.

Curiosity.

I cracked my knuckles.

"Alright, toaster. Let's burn this story."

[IT'S 'SYSTEM.']

"Sure, Sure."

----------

[DEAR READERS: COMMENT BELOW IF YOU WISH TO UNLOCK THE FIRST CHARACTER'S ORIGIN! ALSO, IF YOU'RE STILL READING, BLESS YOU.]

______________.

Ok...

Um, hello? When do we start? Hey toaster!

[ yes host, the soul transfer will begin shortly. You must decide on your background and other elements of the story as there are no comments deciding on that. ]

[I AM NOT A TOASTER!]

[Good luck! ]

I will try.

OK....

But, am I really not going crazy?..

[...]

Before I go. Um, can I request something?

[WHAT IS THE REQUEST?]

AH, please clean this room...

[I...am shocked at you laziness]..

(^.^)

[TO be Continued...]