Colette Briars has been dreaming about nothing but her retirement since she was a young girl. Between high school, librarian volunteer work, and retirement planning she thought her life was all figured out...Or so she thought. After a fateful encounter with a teenage vampire, Theo Dragos, she'll start to question whether she'll have to put romance or retirement first!

I Already Planned My Retirement

ROMANCE

COMEDY

SLICEOFLIFE

ANIME

VAMPIRE

SWEET

CRUSH

Opening & Hook:
The story opens with the protagonist, a vampire, casually reflecting on the possibility that his human co-worker might have figured out he’s a bloodsucker. This sets a sarcastic, laid-back tone that immediately feels like a modern-day supernatural office comedy. The title itself is already working hard—funny, self-aware, and ironic.

The hook is solid. A vampire worried about being found out by a co-worker is a low-stakes twist on what’s usually a high-stakes premise. That makes it fresh.

Tone & Voice:
The narration voice is confident and witty, with a tired sarcasm that makes the MC relatable. He’s not some tortured, mysterious, brooding vampire. He’s an exhausted office worker who happens to drink blood and complains about morning shifts.

That contrast between mundane life and supernatural reality is where this story shines. It’s comedic without being try-hard, and it doesn’t take itself too seriously.

basically i like everything about it... if that wasnt clear

