Interrogation

A middle-aged man appeared in front of James prison cell. The man had messy black hair and a messy beard. If it wasn't for his uniform, he would look homeless. James looked at the man and realized he was the man that laughed at him when he first entered the camp. The man spoke, "@$%@^&#$#."

James glanced at the man and noticed he had a different uniform than the common soldiers. It was fancier and had more badges. James assumed he was a higher-ranking soldier. James replied, "I don't understand you. I'm not from here."

The middle-aged man spoke again, "@$%@^&#$#@$%@^&#$#@$%@^&#$#." James face scrunched in frustration before yelling, "I don't fucking understand you Beardy-face. ENGLISH, do you fucking speak it?!"

Beardy-face gave James a sharp look to express displeasure with the tone James spoke. He opened the cell and grabbed James. He picked him up by the scruff of his collar as if James was light as a newborn kitten. Beardy-face carried him out of the cell and walked down the hallway. James felt as if he was being carried downhill. At the end of the tunnel there was a bulky iron door. Beardy-face opened the door and threw James in it before slamming it shut.

*Drip drip drip* James heard the familiar dripping sound he had become familiar with in his previous cell. Only now the sound was much louder. James lifted his head off the ground to examine the new cell when he saw the source of the dripping sound.

"Gahhh" James screamed and scuffled back against the wall. In front of him was an iron table. A body was cuffed to the table by metal chains. He had various tools sticking out of his body with blood dripping down from them. *drip drip drip*. The sound James had heard for the last few hours was from the blood dripping down into a puddle of blood on the floor.

The body's head slowly turned over when the screaming sound occurred. The body was still alive. It was a soldier from the BlueWoods Kingdom. He was pale, and his body was trembling. His lips looked dry as if they haven't tasted water for days. His mouth slowly started moving but no sound came out. James noticed a torture tool of some kind was stuck in his neck. James thought to himself, "Is that why he can't speak? Or is he just too thirsty?"

James stared at the man and the man kept trying to speak. James didn't know what he was trying to say since he couldn't understand the language in the first place. There's no way he could lip-read a language he doesn't speak after all. However, deep down James knew. The man was begging James to kill him. To release him from this hellish torment. James scrunched up in the corner. He closed his eyes and covered his ears. "There's no way to be sure he's asking me to kill him. Besides, I've never killed anyone. I can't just kill him. The guards might punish me if I did. No way I'm doing it!"

The bound man started moaning in pain and rattling his chains as if begging for the torment to end. James shivered and kept his eyes closed to deny the reality in front of him. He was only an eighteen-year-old high schooler who hadn't even graduated yet. How could he be expected to deal with the nightmare he was currently living?

Two days went by. The man had stopped moving over a day ago. James presumed he finally died of blood loss. James was dying of thirst. He hadn't had a single drink since he came to this world nearly three days ago. He was also hungry, tired, and exhausted. However, the thirst was torture. Humans could typically only go three to four days without water.

James psyched himself up, "It's for survival! As long as I can survive it'll be worth it. I can get revenge later. I'll destroy the entire Drake Kingdom! No, actually… that's too scary. I'll just get strong and return to kill the guards! No… those guards probably have families and are just doing their jobs… Beardy-face then! I'll someday come back to kill Beardy-face! I'll crush him and feed him to a dragon. I'll laugh while watching while a beautiful woman feeds me delicious grapes. HAHAHA. It'll serve that bastard right! Hahaha… Okay. Anything for survival. I'm doing it!"

With his psyche pumped up James crawled on all fours towards the dead body on the iron table. He looked intensely at the puddle of blood that accumulated on the floor. He was so thirsty. This was the only option. He forced his face down into it… and he drank it. He drank as fast as he could to get it over with.

"Blurghhh" James got halfway through drinking the puddle of blood before he threw up all over the floor. He felt dizzy and nauseous. "Damnit, this is even worse!"

*Che-clunk* James heard a sound and raised his head. It was the bearded bastard. He glanced at the vomit in disgust before picking up James by his collar and carrying him out of the cell. "Fucking Beardy-face you couldn't have come five minutes earlier before I drank that crap!"

Beardy-face glanced at James and replied "@$%@^&#$#@$%?"

James sighed, "Damnit Beardy-face. Why don't you speak English? Whatever it's fine. It's all in the past now. Just you and me now. Let's be friends. Let bygones be bygones. We'll take the dragon flying to the beach. Pick up some cat-girls, hit up some parties, and get laid. You know what I mean eh? These desires must transcend the barriers of language. Please tell me this world has cat-girls okay? Just that. I just need this one win for it to all be worth it okay?"

James was carried into a room. Unlike the previous rooms this room had a window that let light in. There was a table with some food and water on it. A bookshelf in one corner and a desk in another. It looked like an office of some sort. A young woman was sitting at the table. She was dressed in white priest robes and had a pair of horns coming out of her forehead. She gestured for James to sit and he gladly took her up on the offer. He then immediately went for the jug of water and chugged half of it. He ate the food with wild abandon and after several minutes he finished all of the food and water.

"Burrrrp! Sorry about that. Haven't had a thing to eat or drink in days. Worst customer service ever. One out of five stars. No, make that negative one out of five stars."

The woman smiled and spoke, "I apologize for the mistreatment. Most warriors can go several days without food or water with ease. I'm sure Captain Beardy didn't realize you were so…. weak."

James responded, "You're damn right I was mistreated! What kind of prison doesn't even give water to the prisoners. The Drake Kingdom should be ashamed o- GAHH! YOU SPEAK ENGLISH!?" James stared at the woman in shock. How could she speak English? This place was definitely not Earth. James was already preparing to take a vow of silence and become a monk since he thought no one would ever understand him again!

The woman continued to smile. She sat upright and looked like an angel descended from the heavens. There was a dull white light that shone from her that seemed to calm James mind and made it hard to take his eyes off her. She spoke once more, "It's not that I already knew English. I am a descendant and priest of the Elder Dragon. All descendants of the Elder Dragon naturally inherited his ability to understand and speak all languages. Oh, I forgot to do introductions. You may call me Lumi."

James responded, "You can call me Dawn, James Dawn… No one is ever going to get that joke in this world damnit… Anyways who's the Elder Dragon. Sounds important? He the king or something?"

Lumi gasped in shock, "You don't know the Elder Dragon!? Everyone within the BlueFire continent knows of the Elder Dragon! He is the deity that protects the Drake Kingdom and the subject of our worship. He has followers in many kingdoms as the god that blessed all species with language! He's also known as the god that caused the elves to go extinct."

James listened attentively to what was being said. He thought to himself, "… Thank god I didn't get a dragonborn system. Elder Dragon sounds scary. Yes, the uniform system is clearly superior. ALL HAIL UNIFORM SYSTEM! Why'd he have to wipe out the elves though? Aren't elves supposed to be hot? Right time to ask the important questions. The one I've been dying for these past few days. The question that will determine my future destiny!"

James looked Lumi in the eyes with an intense glare. He spoke, "Lumi. I have one question I absolutely must know the answer to. This is a matter of whether I can keep my will to continue living so I hope you will answer me honestly… Does this world have cat-girls?"

Lumi stared at the man in front of her with her mouth wide open. She was dazed. She had expected an important question that could possibly inform her of this man's motives for infiltrating the Drake Kingdoms army… but instead he asked such a stupid question?! Lumi spoke hesitantly, "…I have heard there are cat-girls in the neighboring BeastWater continent, but I have never personally met them, so I can't give you a definite answer."

James laughed ecstatically, "Haha, great, great, great! If they exist, then all the hell I've suffered the last few days was worth it. God, Buddha, Elder Dragon… whoever made this happen I am your devout follower. I will definitely journey to paradise and fulfill every Earthling weeaboo's dreams!"

Lumi looked at James like he was a creepy lunatic. A bulky, tan, red-haired man laughing maniacally about journeying to find cat girls… She muttered under her breath, "Disgusting."

James realized he was acting unsightly and collected himself. On Earth he was a closet weeaboo, but this fantasy setting seemed to be making him lose his usual composure. He coughed, "Ahem, excuse me. So, I don't suppose I can go free now? I really meant no harm to the Drake Kingdom. This is all a big misunderstanding!"

Lumi spoke, "I can let you go once I confirm you're not a spy for another kingdom nor are you plotting against us. To do that I'll need you to drink this truth potion and answer all my questions." Lumi gave a brilliant smile, "Of course the alternative is torture. I believe you've already seen the room yes?"

James gulped when he saw Lumi's smiling face as she spoke those words. He thought to himself, "This is no angel! She's a demon! A devil! No wonder she has horns! Elder Dragon must be an evil god! Why is my luck so bad???" James spoke with an ugly smile, "I'd be most honored to cooperate Ms. Lumi. Go ahead and give me the potion".

James took the truth potion and drank it down. It had no real taste but was so slimy as to be disgusting. After drinking the potion, the questions began.

Lumi spoke, "Why did you pretend to be a Drake Kingdom solider?"

James eyes were dilated, and he spoke in a calm slow voice that seemed to be outside his control, "I wanted to figure out where I am, what was happening around me, and where the nearest city is."

Lumi frowned since this wasn't an answer she was expecting. "Where are you from"

James responded, "I am from Earth."

Lumi frowned again. She had never even heard of Earth. There were only three continents, and none were named Earth. She spoke, "Where is Earth?"

James replied, "The planet Earth is in the Solar System of the Milky Way Galaxy."

Lumi shook her head in confusion. 'I've never heard of these terms. You must be from another plane of existence. Speak! Why have you invaded the Magus Plane?"

James again responded outside of his own control, "A meteor chased after me and slammed into my back. I passed out and when I woke up I was on the outskirts of the battlefield between the BlueWoods Kingdom and Drake Kingdom.

Lumi snapped her fingers and James was shaken out of his odd state where he answered everything like a robot. Lumi spoke, "I've heard what I needed. I'll discuss the next course of actions with Captain Beardy." Lumi stood up and left the room.

James sighed wondering if they would let him go free or not. He thought back to the long conversation he just had. James then realized he had missed one extremely important detail. Something that could absolutely not be glossed over. He muttered to himself in disbelief, "Beardy-face's name is actually Captain Beardy? Poor bastard!"

James continued to wait for several minutes when he heard a ding sound!

[Special condition achieved. Conversation held with descendent of Elder Dragon. Analyzing conversation. Decoding English to Magus language. Decoding Elder Dragon power of all languages. Decoding complete. Universal real-time translator is unlocked for free. Usage implemented. All languages automatically understood. User James Dawn may speak in any language he wishes with a thought.]

James stared at the message for a second before jumping out of his chair in excitement! "Thank you system! Finally, something useful! I could kiss you if you physically existed! It's all uphill from here!" James put his hands on his hips and pointed his head up slightly. He laughed in a joyous manner, "BWHAHAHA!!!"

The iron door opened. Lumi and Captain Beardy were staring at James as if he was a madman. James blushed and sat back in his chair. He closed his eyes and rested his head on his hands. He began to think, "Right now is the time. I don't know their decision, but I now have a new card in my hands. Lord Universal Translator. The greatest gift the shitty system gave me! Yes, the gift is so great I must refer to the Universal Translator as Lord respectfully to show my utmost gratitude. As for the system… for now it shall still be called shitty system. Why? Because it's a shitty system. Okay! Focus! Back on topic! How to use this? Right, there is only one way. Time for my greatest con of all time!"

James slowly stood up from the chair and smoothened out his common soldier uniform. He gave his signature smile. Unfortunately, it was an ugly smile due to his current face the system had given him with the soldier uniform… Regardless he beamed as if all was right in the world. James spoke, "My dear friends Ms. Lumi and Captain Beardy. I am happy to inform you that the Elder Dragon has blessed me with the ability to speak and understand all languages just like Ms. Lumi can. I am very honored to have been recognized by the exalted Elder Dragon and hope to do my best to serve him in the coming days!"

Captain Beardy appeared shocked to see James talking in the Magus tongue. However, the Magus language was widespread and was the most commonly spoken language in the Magus Plane. It could be that James just hid it well earlier on. Lumi also appeared skeptical. So, she began asking James basic questions while transitioning through several languages. The questions were things such as what color is the floor? Or what is your favorite food? James answered each question with ease. Lumi finished by asking in the Elder Dragon language itself, "You really understand me?" James responded with a big smile, "Yes, I do!"

Lumi looked at Captain Beardy and spoke, "The Elder Dragon language can only be spoken by his disciples and decedents. He should be telling the truth. It appears the plan for execution will need to be called off."

James felt cold sweat drip down his back when he heard that. Thank goodness for Lord Universal Translator!

Lumi spoke, "Since things have developed this way then I'll bring you to the capital with me. Each disciple of the Elder God is required to undergo training at the Elder God temple. It is unusual for an outsider to be chosen, but I assume it's related to you being a foreigner from another plan. We leave tomorrow. You may rest in this room until then. I'll have a servant bring some blankets and water." After she finished speaking she turned and left the room with Captain Beardy.

James sat at the table with his head over his hands and his eyes closed. An ugly grin was on his face. He laughed out loud, "Haha, the plan has all come together. Everything went without a hitch. I'll follow along for now and escape at the first opportunity! Then change back to my original appearance! They'll never see this ugly mug again… I gave them my name but I'm sure there are plenty of people with similar names in this world. If not, I can always change it… Now the next plot must begin! My revenge! I will not forgive Beardy-face for my mistreatment! Kekeke I'll gain vengeance on our trip to the capital. I won't kill him. Not yet. He's too strong for me right now. I'll aim for unconventional revenge! I'll put sand in his socks! I'll try to find plants to poison his water and give him diarrhea. I'll cover him in bugs once he falls asleep! MWUAHAHAA, Beardy-face, you'll regret the day you crossed James Dawn!!! MWUHAHAA!!!"

The door to the room opened slowly. A servant was standing there awkwardly staring at James. The servant had some blankets in his arms. James frowned, "Good thing I spoke in English just now…" James took the blankets from the servant and slowly closed the door in his face. He lied down on the blankets and fell asleep in minutes. It had truly been an exhausting few days for James.