RedCeiling

[Completed]:
Volume 1: Loss of a firm hold.

[Upcoming]:
Volume 2: Intertwined fingers.

[Excerpt]:
"I think I love you," I told him. The feeling of wanting to be with him for the rest of the time started the day he first visited me at the orphanage.

"You do, and I love you too." Then he walked nearer, "Promise me it'll be the two of us," he asked.

"Promise." 

But was that really possible? "I'm technically your sister," I said. We were old enough to understand certain things.

"Adopted." He stressed. "What I asked them was I wanted to you be with me forever. There will be no one to point on that," he said. Were things really that simple? But listening him say them was all I needed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I found out that I was pregnant almost a fortnight ago and which woman does not be happy? I wanted to tell him first and I did. But the reaction he gave made me doubt my entire life. First it was a surprise and then, as I waited for his response, I watched his eyes become happy. But before he smiled, a very small and indecipherable frown appeared and he hugged me tight not giving me a chance to read his face anymore. His breathing was quick and heavy. After he released me, I took in the smile on his face; only, I didn't know if I should call it a smile. All there was in his eyes was a hue of sadness.

"What's wrong?" I questioned him directly. His face changed once again. He seemed troubled.

"Nothing," he smiled and added that he was happy.

"You're not," I stated. He is not a fool to think that I would not know when something is wrong. And he would be more wrong to think that I would let this slip.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Look at me.” I said calmly. He shifted his head but still avoided my eyes. I walked up to him and put my eyes in his line of sight.

“Don’t you know what I mean ‘every day’?”

He took a quick step back. “Jessie, what’s wrong? Why are you like this?” What’s wrong?

An ear piercing sound rang through the room. I slapped hard across the face. Then I noticed that I started crying. Through my blurry eyes, I saw his eyes tearing up too. This was yet another unpleasant first. The first time I was forced to slap him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Are you okay?” I asked him lifting my head to see his face. His chin rested on my head and I still did not have a proper look. I tried to move my head slowly in another attempt, but he held me tight, not letting me move. Was he still crying? Perhaps that was why he did not like me seeing him.

When we were kids and something troubled him, he used to find me to let it out. Crying was included sometimes. He did not hide his tears back then. Because, boys did not particularly cry in front of their girls, I questioned him how he saw this once. It was a playful teasing that I aimed at. But, he gave me a serious and truthful confession in return. Mentally I am the stronger one and he told me that crying in front of me never felt like he was lowering himself. That was his level of acceptance.

But everything he is doing now is in a stark controversy to my beliefs.

He spoke after calming himself more, “I’m not.”

[Target Audience]:
This story has 3 volumes. From the name, it is not odd that this is totally based on love. The first volume is a little tragic, the reason why it is under realistic fiction. If tragic romance upsets you, then this might as well.

**[UNEDITED]**
I didn't proof read all the parts. But I usually keep an eye to check for mistakes as I write. So hopefully there are not too many of them. Will be editing soon.

Struggle Of Love

"You what?" I asked in a low voice; no, he should not.


"Yeah, he's dealing it. What you did could ruin it."


Ton and I said as soon as James's words sunk in.


"Calm down, kids! Or they'll rush in here thinking we're fighting!"


"I did, Sai. But not very directly. But I believe she could decipher the meaning." I was shocked. He couldn't have done that. What now? Since when was she aware of what so ever? Is this how very matured our James was?


"Sai . . . Please. It will be fine." Sure it will. I breathed in deeply and trapped all the air inside. After sometime, after I calmed down and my worry wore off a bit, I breathed out making a loud sigh. I was this hopeless to begin with, anyway.


"When?" I asked directly trying not to sound rude.


"It's been four months approximately. Believe me, when I told her, she looked like she understood but she was not shocked at all. It was not like I told her something new at all. Like she had always known of your feelings for her."


I didn't feel like saying anything. I just stood up and headed to the bathroom that was attached to the room we are in.


I locked myself in the bathroom and washed my face. Somehow, everything felt out of place now. James knew I was trying hard and being careful with the subject. He should have asked me first before saying something that big. He was always trying to help me. He even convinced Jessy and I don't know if that has affected their relationship. I confided in him because I knew he would help me but, not like this. 


Hell, this was not help at all. I had already confessed to her while I was in the last year at school. The outcome was what I call a cruel deed of fate. She could not believe me and told me that if I was still trying to apologize for slapping her that evening, it was not required. Then, she said she was grateful for having me as her best friend. I tried convincing her and that was when she concluded that either I was joking or that she would be killing some non-existent person that gave me this as a dare. Then she laughed it off saying I was funnier than ever. It was painful.


I heard knocking on the bathroom door twice before Ton called out, "Come on out already."


I washed my face another time before going out.


"Sorry," James apologized while looking into the wall. Of course he wasn't truly feeling sorry. After all, his intentions cannot be negative, but still, I felt betrayed. He did it to help me. But it was not in his place to tell her. In fact, I knew very clearly that I was confiding a deep secret in him.


"Why when you don't think what you did is wrong?" If I was rude to Jessy earlier today, now I was being double times as rude.


"Let it go? Thank you!" I said. I couldn't stop myself from being this rude. But now I feel what he did was beyond betrayal.


"Shut up, now." Ton, who was silent since I stepped out of the bathroom, said getting up from the couch near where I stood. "It's you who are so incapable of handling things and taking that frustration out on everyone that comes your way." 


How did I ever think of these two as friends? This is the reason I don't talk much. If I kept quiet and only spoke limited, without just answering and letting them hear what they wanted to know, I would not be standing numb like I am right now as I realise that people can easily flip sides. Then, I realised something else, it's not too late to stop considering them important anymore.


Spill the Beans