RedCeiling

[Completed]:
Volume 1: Loss of a firm hold.

[Upcoming]:
Volume 2: Intertwined fingers.

[Excerpt]:
"I think I love you," I told him. The feeling of wanting to be with him for the rest of the time started the day he first visited me at the orphanage.

"You do, and I love you too." Then he walked nearer, "Promise me it'll be the two of us," he asked.

"Promise." 

But was that really possible? "I'm technically your sister," I said. We were old enough to understand certain things.

"Adopted." He stressed. "What I asked them was I wanted to you be with me forever. There will be no one to point on that," he said. Were things really that simple? But listening him say them was all I needed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I found out that I was pregnant almost a fortnight ago and which woman does not be happy? I wanted to tell him first and I did. But the reaction he gave made me doubt my entire life. First it was a surprise and then, as I waited for his response, I watched his eyes become happy. But before he smiled, a very small and indecipherable frown appeared and he hugged me tight not giving me a chance to read his face anymore. His breathing was quick and heavy. After he released me, I took in the smile on his face; only, I didn't know if I should call it a smile. All there was in his eyes was a hue of sadness.

"What's wrong?" I questioned him directly. His face changed once again. He seemed troubled.

"Nothing," he smiled and added that he was happy.

"You're not," I stated. He is not a fool to think that I would not know when something is wrong. And he would be more wrong to think that I would let this slip.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Look at me.” I said calmly. He shifted his head but still avoided my eyes. I walked up to him and put my eyes in his line of sight.

“Don’t you know what I mean ‘every day’?”

He took a quick step back. “Jessie, what’s wrong? Why are you like this?” What’s wrong?

An ear piercing sound rang through the room. I slapped hard across the face. Then I noticed that I started crying. Through my blurry eyes, I saw his eyes tearing up too. This was yet another unpleasant first. The first time I was forced to slap him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Are you okay?” I asked him lifting my head to see his face. His chin rested on my head and I still did not have a proper look. I tried to move my head slowly in another attempt, but he held me tight, not letting me move. Was he still crying? Perhaps that was why he did not like me seeing him.

When we were kids and something troubled him, he used to find me to let it out. Crying was included sometimes. He did not hide his tears back then. Because, boys did not particularly cry in front of their girls, I questioned him how he saw this once. It was a playful teasing that I aimed at. But, he gave me a serious and truthful confession in return. Mentally I am the stronger one and he told me that crying in front of me never felt like he was lowering himself. That was his level of acceptance.

But everything he is doing now is in a stark controversy to my beliefs.

He spoke after calming himself more, “I’m not.”

[Target Audience]:
This story has 3 volumes. From the name, it is not odd that this is totally based on love. The first volume is a little tragic, the reason why it is under realistic fiction. If tragic romance upsets you, then this might as well.

**[UNEDITED]**
I didn't proof read all the parts. But I usually keep an eye to check for mistakes as I write. So hopefully there are not too many of them. Will be editing soon.

Struggle Of Love

"Please tell me. Whom else should I ask? James? Nah, you tell me." Wasn't that easy for him to say? 'You tell me.'


"They were dating since when? And living together since when?"


"I see." I just concentrated on the football game in the TV. He didn't talk anymore. Ton, James, Ao and Ai are the only ones I speak with more than just required. May was in that list till recently, before I realised she was waiting for every chance to start some sort of enmity. My brother was in the list too, after a little gap. I should be more free at home.


I wonder though, what did May have to speak with James about? It has been half an hour since they started talking. Just as I thought of them, May unlocked the door and came out side and sat beside me. "What happened?" I asked, I categorize some of my actions as mere reflexes like this one now. 


She just shrugged and continued staring off into the wall opposite.


Ton went in to check on James. To say I was shocked with the predicament before is a little truth. I was shaken to the core to see him crying. He rarely ever got upset, let alone let the tears flow. But, somewhere I felt it did not just have to do with what I said. He knows what he did and I didn't really see him regretting telling this girl beside me anything. Just as my thoughts occupied my mind, I realised that May perhaps knows about my feelings and that she's right here next to me. I felt empty. She knows but she decided not to do anything about it. I miss the girl she used to be. If it was that girl, I would have already been confronted and she would have strangled me for answers and conformations. Perhaps she would think what to do about it when I confess directly.


"The girls are still in," I suggested for her to continue with their talk, she could miss something. Or, I didn't want her here at the moment. The emptiness is a dangerous feeling. I didn't care much at the moment. I did not want to care so much and be cautious of her at this time. This was total despair.


She glanced in my direction and turned back to the TV, her sharp eyes doing nothing to calm down my anxiety. "You think I don't know that?" That accusingly sharp tone was my cue to shut up. Having nothing to do beside her, I wanted to walk back to James and Ton, but I couldn't move a muscle in her presence. I wish I could get out of there without her notice. Just like that, I continued sitting there.


She took the remote and changed channels until she found a music channel. I wasn't concentrating on the match but she could have at least acknowledged, she couldn't have just said that she was going to change the channel. But no, it was like I wasn't even there.


My phone pinged and I was about to reach it when May has already bent a little forward to fetch my phone off the tea table. She saw the notification that floated over my lock screen, and then handed it to me, taking her focus back to the song playing on the TV.


Empty