RedCeiling

[Completed]:
Volume 1: Loss of a firm hold.

[Upcoming]:
Volume 2: Intertwined fingers.

[Excerpt]:
"I think I love you," I told him. The feeling of wanting to be with him for the rest of the time started the day he first visited me at the orphanage.

"You do, and I love you too." Then he walked nearer, "Promise me it'll be the two of us," he asked.

"Promise." 

But was that really possible? "I'm technically your sister," I said. We were old enough to understand certain things.

"Adopted." He stressed. "What I asked them was I wanted to you be with me forever. There will be no one to point on that," he said. Were things really that simple? But listening him say them was all I needed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I found out that I was pregnant almost a fortnight ago and which woman does not be happy? I wanted to tell him first and I did. But the reaction he gave made me doubt my entire life. First it was a surprise and then, as I waited for his response, I watched his eyes become happy. But before he smiled, a very small and indecipherable frown appeared and he hugged me tight not giving me a chance to read his face anymore. His breathing was quick and heavy. After he released me, I took in the smile on his face; only, I didn't know if I should call it a smile. All there was in his eyes was a hue of sadness.

"What's wrong?" I questioned him directly. His face changed once again. He seemed troubled.

"Nothing," he smiled and added that he was happy.

"You're not," I stated. He is not a fool to think that I would not know when something is wrong. And he would be more wrong to think that I would let this slip.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Look at me.” I said calmly. He shifted his head but still avoided my eyes. I walked up to him and put my eyes in his line of sight.

“Don’t you know what I mean ‘every day’?”

He took a quick step back. “Jessie, what’s wrong? Why are you like this?” What’s wrong?

An ear piercing sound rang through the room. I slapped hard across the face. Then I noticed that I started crying. Through my blurry eyes, I saw his eyes tearing up too. This was yet another unpleasant first. The first time I was forced to slap him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Are you okay?” I asked him lifting my head to see his face. His chin rested on my head and I still did not have a proper look. I tried to move my head slowly in another attempt, but he held me tight, not letting me move. Was he still crying? Perhaps that was why he did not like me seeing him.

When we were kids and something troubled him, he used to find me to let it out. Crying was included sometimes. He did not hide his tears back then. Because, boys did not particularly cry in front of their girls, I questioned him how he saw this once. It was a playful teasing that I aimed at. But, he gave me a serious and truthful confession in return. Mentally I am the stronger one and he told me that crying in front of me never felt like he was lowering himself. That was his level of acceptance.

But everything he is doing now is in a stark controversy to my beliefs.

He spoke after calming himself more, “I’m not.”

[Target Audience]:
This story has 3 volumes. From the name, it is not odd that this is totally based on love. The first volume is a little tragic, the reason why it is under realistic fiction. If tragic romance upsets you, then this might as well.

**[UNEDITED]**
I didn't proof read all the parts. But I usually keep an eye to check for mistakes as I write. So hopefully there are not too many of them. Will be editing soon.

Struggle Of Love

My family were with me until primary school. One day, because my little sister fell ill, they were driving to the hospital. On their way, their car was crushed heavily in an accident and I lost them. Jenny was so little back then that I still have difficulty in understanding why the world was so cruel to take her away. To take all of them away from me. We were a migrated family. Though we had some relatives, they were all more or less non-existent. And when the accident happened, they were completely non-existent.


After all the fiasco with the hospital and lawyers I was finally sent to an orphanage from the police's care. I had to write, well, sign my name so many times then and later I knew that our house was transferred to my name and some more complicated things. All I had cared about then was if my things were with me. I was packed a bag with my clothes, tooth brush and such. I only felt a slight sense of security if I hugged my doll I had and the bag tightly.


The orphanage was near the preschool I went to. But they did not send me there anymore probably because the year was at the end.


That phase of my life was the loneliest. I was too young at that time to actually understand and sink in what happened. One weekend, I had a visitor. I was taken to meet the person and who I had seen there, moved me.


It was James and his parents. After a nightmare with unknown people, seeing them was overwhelming. James walked to me and hugged me tight. "Hey, Jessie, don't worry," he had said to me. Until that point I was not taking in any reality. I had to worry; I had no role in my life.


When I heard him, it was like switch, I cried out hard. In fact, I started to speak again only after they came to visit me. Then mom took me in her arms and carried to her chest while James asked dad to hold him like mom held me. Then they took me out to get some food and ice cream. All along I had been crying onto mom's dress. I felt guilty.


When they dropped me back, I had an urge to follow them. To ask them to take me with them. But I knew it was already out of their way for what they have done today.


"We will be back again, dear," dad told me. I used to call them auntie and uncle that time.


I smiled through my brimming tears and hugged his leg, "Thank you so much," I said and stepped back.


"Won't you come to school?" James asked me.


Then after another hug with all of them, they left and I went back in to find the auntie that comes to me give me food or for other things.


"Can I go back to my school?" I asked her.


"Well, I will talk to the manager and let you know," she smiled.


Then later, she came with good news. She said, "You can go to your school! Your school takes fees for the whole year at the begging, so you can!"


And from the next day onwards I went back to my preschool. I would only sit beside James and nowhere else.


Moved