And as I stepped my feet at the water
just beneath me, I saw my reflection.
My face laced with an emotion I didn't
know I have. My feet was halfly buried
under the sand. My heart was in chaos
at the same time it felt peace send by
the place I am in.
The water felt cold. My cheeks a little bit tanned from the sun. I thought about I wanted, what I need and those things that not here when I needed and wanted it. I thought about all the problems and difficulties while I watch the waves reach my feet.
The sun has seen it all of it.
The way my life have started
and maybe, how is it going to end?
Does it remember everything? And
maybe some of my memories that
erased my mind?
Does the secret lies beneath like the sand too? Does it need to be discovered by digging it?
Or maybe it should be hidden forever.
And at the very moment I was okay.
I shouldn't be worrying about anything. My problems didn't matter, the confusions, mistakes, even the lost. But then suddenly,
In split second, I found myself outside the streets on a very familiar city. The city lights, the smoke, the noise. It came back into a storm. And I was there starting blankly again.
And I knew it in that very moment, I need to face the demons again. Unarmored and with no stand. Black curls rising to my whitebillowing dress, staining them as I walked backwards slowly and saw black shadows beneath my every step. To face the reality that I was trying to escape over and over again.
The burden that have stayed on me
in years was still there. The warm
tingled on my chest which makes
me struggle to breath.
I fell to the ground on my knees and I know at the very time...
I wasn't okay.