Chapter 14: Harvest Moons (2)

Soon we enter the bath halls and got on our robes from separate dressing rooms. Eriol was left waiting outside by the corridors.

I slowly dipped my toes in first and made my way further, submerging my entire body to the hot springs. The warmth of the waters were perfect. It was calming as it was exhilarating.

I soon had the waters up to the level of my shoulder, just below my collarbone. "Isera?" I called out as she just stood behind me, looking so hydrophobic. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head, both her hands on her chest. "I guess I'm just nervous after all" she tried her best to smile though her anxiety still lingered.

"I won't bite" I chuckled.

She manage to really smile. "I know. I'm sorry if I seem odd. It's just that I've never interacted with a situation like this with people before."

I made my way to the edge of the waters where she stood wearily. I held out a hand to her, "I'll help you. Grab my hand"

She took one step aback instead.

"Okay, how about you just dip your feet on the waters. Just do that at least?" I shrugged, taking my hand down.

She nods.

I gave her space and she sat on the edge and reluctantly dipped both her feet in. She tagged and pulled at her robe tighter around her.

Gosh. I'm not going to harass her or anything. 💧

"I'm sorry, Aerra." she sighs, looking so apologetic,

"It's alright. You're trying your best" I answered as I made my way to one corner and rested there.

"May I ask how old are you?" I began

"I'm thirteen. My sister is eighteen."

Oh. So she's just one year older than me. Well, she's pretty tall for her age.

"Is it alright if I ask what happened to your sister?"

I guess this is how to open a conversation. She seems to have mentioned her sister on the topic anyway.

She nods, "About two years ago, my parents along with my sister, Clara, went to travel to the outskirts of our country to outreach help because of the harsh winter weathers. But something happened... an incident happened that caused my parents lives and my sister was left unconscious. She won't wake up no matter what we do. Not even a healing magus can help her. That's why... I had to replace her."

"Sorry for what happened but... ummm, what do you mean by she doesn't wake up?"

"It seems like a strong black magic was done to curse her to be like that. We are exhausted from any ideas on how to revert her back. But aside from the sleeping curse, she seems healthy still. Or at least for now..." her voice trails off.

A strong sleeping curse huh?

I wonder if the Null element can do something about that?

But if I expose myself as a Null element user, then it's high likely that I'll reveal myself as a dark elemental magus. My entire Household will suffer from such scandal... I can't act impulsively.

"I'm sorry if I'm making the atmosphere gloomy" she says.

"No, not at all! I was the one who brought it up!" I scratched a ghost itch on my face, "Umm... sorry if I'm making you feel uncomfortable."

She shook her head fervently, "No! It's alright. I'm glad we're at least taking so casually like this. No one speaks to me like this."

"How about you ask me questions and I'll try to answer just to be fair" I said, hoping the conversation would lead us towards her telling me what she saw when she read my future.

She paused and placed few fingers on her lips, "Hmm. Have you fallen in love, Aerra?"

My eyes grew at her question. Well, I didn't expect she will ask that.

"Never." I replied, I wonder if I have to elaborate. "Have you?"

She shook her head. "I never had, of course."

"Ummm, why ask?"

"It seems like it's the most common question people asks me when they want me to read their fortunes. Things like, 'am I going to meet someone?' Or 'will I ever find true love?' People are more interested about things like that than really asking how they will die."

Maybe because asking how they will die is a scary thing?

"Have you seen it in my fortune?"

"Do you really want to know?" she smiled

"Actually, what I want to know is what you exactly saw from my future" I said as a matter of factly.

"You're one of the few that doesn't seem interested about your love lives. It's amusing."

Because that's the least of my worries right now, is what I want to say. My consciousness is slowly being hijacked by my own dark magic, I don't think a fairy tale ending where a prince kisses the princess would lead me to have a happy ever after.

Whew. It's getting really warm in here.

"It's just so odd that I saw you cry when you read my future." I tried to stir the conversation back to the topic. "It's really has gotten me curious. Especially what you told me, about changing tides and apologizing."

"Oh... about that..." she pauses.

I'm getting dizzy. I suppose I need to get out of the water now.

I walked back to where Isera is and she just watch me anxiously, "Are you alright?"

"Y-yeah. I guess the water is just really warm. Too warm."

"Take my hand, lets get you out of the water before you pass out" she murmurs as she reach a hand at me, getting her feet out of the waters.

I took it and she pulled me up in one go.

But she slid down and bumped her head to the floor and slides down to the water.

I watch her sink to the bottom with bubbles forming on the surface.

"Isera!!!"

My mind is getting fuzzy that even my reflex was on slowmo.

Nevertheless, I dive down to get her and found her unconscious, her body slowly surfacing, motionless.

I grabbed her arm and tried my best to pull ourselves to the edge of the waters.

"Isera!! Are you okay?" I shook her shoulders a bit. There was no response.

At least her head is not bleeding.

I hurried to climb up first and then grabbed her from behind to get her out of the waters.

First her torso has surfaced.

Her robe parted severely off and showed more skin than I expected. "I'm so sorry!" I grunted as I took one last pull and finally got her entire body out.

I hurried to her side

and check if she's breathi—

Huh?

...

𓃰

I saw something I shouldn't have seen.

But just a glimpse. Just enough to have warned me not to stare at it or have it imprinted on my mind.

Isera's eyes slowly opened.

"Uhm. I'm... I am g-glad you're... a-a-awake." I stuttered. I tried my best to turn my head the opposite direction.

"Aerra?" she pulls herself up with an elbow. "You're alright! I'm so relieved! I'm sorry, I wanted to help you get out but I'm not really physically blessed with strength." She added.

I covered my eyes with both my hands like a horse's blinders to avoid seeing what is opened for me to see by the corner as her robe parted open below.

"Maybe we should g-get you a t-t-towel? Ahem" I cleared my throat. I pointed a finger by the exposed center of her body where her legs meets her torso.

It seems she's physically blessed with something else.

"It's showing...." my voice wavered.

I can hear her gasped aloud.

She instantly sat upright and fixed her robe in place. "You... saw?"

"The water is too warm. I'm just hallucinating....

—But yes." I muttered as I got up. "I'll go get us some towels."

"Wait" she grabbed my hand even before I could walk away.

"Please, lets talk first." I looked at her unsure and found her gazing at me with such serious eyes.

I took a deep breath and sat back down on my heels just beside her.

"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to flash you. You must be scared.... I don't blame you if you're now weary of me." Isera says in despondence.

"I'm more confused rather scared actually...."

She shook her head, "The truth is out, huh? I wasn't expecting it to be this sooner but... yes. I'm actually a boy."

"Y-yyyyyeah. I believe you" I winced. I'm pretty sure that thing is what defines a guy from a girl.

𓃰

"I'm really sorry! But please... don't tell anyone....

the truth is— right now, you're the only person who knows my secret."

I froze in place.

"Wait— But aren't you supposed to be the Arch Priestess of your country?"

Isera nods slowly.

If I look at him now, he honestly looks like a girl with just a flat chested figure. Ivory flawless skin, silky cobalt colored hair, added that her demeanor is very mellow...

I'm so confused.

He's more of a lady than I am—!

"I am raised like this..." he began. "In our land, it's an omen to give birth to a baby boy if you hail from the long line of revered Priestesses. That's why my parents hid the truth in fear that I might be taken away from them just to keep their names and reputations untarnished.

I was suppose to be and raised as the grand scholar that transcribe the holy scripts. I would be sent to the mountain temples alone and my identity would be safely hidden forevermore. But with the incident with my parents and my sister, the elders had no other choice but to make me their leader instead.

And now, I'm trapped to this fate. No one else knows what I really am and I live... every day praying to the goddesses... to forgive me for deceiving my people."

I can see tears warning to bloom out from his eyes.

"But who am I kidding? I'm just really scared for myself. I'm scared that if the people find out the truth, they will have me tortured and burned alive in the middle of the city! People will want me dead. My grave won't even bear a name."

His voice trembled and tears finally went on streaming out of his eyes.

"I didn't mean to be born like this... I bring such a misfortune to my family. The omens must be real. I shouldn't have been born. It's my fault they died. It's all my fau—!"

I ran my hand across his face without a warning. Slapping hardly to snap him out.

He looked at me in shock as he traced the red mark on his cheek.

"I don't think your parents would be happy if they hear you saying that."

He looked at me with lips apart. Tears had flooded his eyes.

"Don't say such foolish things like that" I stated. I dropped my eyes down and realized, I'm somewhat on the same boat as he is.

My existence will bring misfortune to my family.

A fate that I never wish to have.

A life I'm leaving in fear that one day I might get exposed.

"I understand, Isera. I understand you."

I reached out to him and hugged him. "It's never your fault. You did nothing wrong"

For a moment there was silence.

His eyes were filled with more tears,

His breath trembled, gasping and then...

I watch him shatter.

He began to wail and cry on my arms.

Like he can finally cry it all out for the first time.

I rub his back as he went on crying.

"I'm so scared, Aerra. I'm so scared..."

I wrapped my arms around him tighter. This world can really be cruel after all.

"I will keep your secret, so don't worry. I'm on your side now. You're no longer alone in this, you hear me?"

He nods, still sobbing.

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I waited till he calmed down before I stood up to fetch us some towels.

He began to dry his hair with the towel I handed over so I sat down just beside him as his eyes were puffy and sore with tears.

"If by chance your sister awaken. Will they revoke your claim as the Arch Priestess?" I asked, breaking the silence and the sullen atmosphere.

He nods. "Yes, but like I said. It's impossible to break the curse. We had the best healers and shamans around to help. Nothing really worked." He paused and just placed the towel down. "I can't even read her future in such state. I wish she wakes up soon. If she did, —I will run away as far as I can and start a new life somewhere and live as how I want to. Live as who I should be. I'm sorry, I know I sound selfish."

What a big predicament he's in, I thought.

"There's nothing wrong being selfish for once in awhile. If we all tend to think about others all the time, knowing our own happiness is what we're betting on along the line, then you're not truly alive. You're likely living as a puppet for other people to mold on their liking. Unless if that's what you truly desire then there's no problem there."

"I want to serve my people. I saw how my parents served the citizens selflessly and they were happy. I want to follow on their footsteps but sometimes, I feel like I'm wondering lost alone. Especially now that they're gone. It kills me inside to see the hopeful eyes of the people but time after time, I can see how the purest of heart can be tainted easily. They still enjoy watching an evil man burn alive in front of their eyes. They cheer all together while singing the song of praises to the goddesses."

Now that is a questionable and disturbing scene.

"In the end, most people only see what they want to see. They believe what they want to believe and most of us really have the selfishness inside us, in order to protect ourselves. Darkness truly never disappears despite all those centennial rituals the Grand central kingdom hold."

I reached for his hand and squeezed it, "Then if you feel like this secret is something that must be kept hidden, why do you intend to simply let me go instead of disposing the threat?"

Isera widened his eyes at me, "I..."

"You still believe there are those who you can genuinely trust despite the darkness in them, am I right?" I smiled at him.

He frowns, "You're not an evil person..."

I released his hand and sat properly upright.

So he did saw my destiny as the fallen one...

I'm starting to believe he rather keep this a secret together rather than to get rid of me because he honestly wants to be found out. Because he bore such a big secret that he doesn't know how to keep. For once he wants to spill it out because it kills him inside to know he's deceiving countless number of people.

And after realizing who I will become, he perhaps somehow felt we're on the same situation.

"I'm sorry if I'm bringing this up all of a sudden..." I stated as he steadied his focus at me. "but can I ask what you saw from my future?"

His eyes sweeps down to the floor and he sighed.

"My powers... like I have told you, has it's own limit. It only allows me to see fragments of visions that seem too ambiguous to interpret. Some think this ability of mine is a blessing. A perfect type power for my status. But in reality, it's the opposite."

He paused for a moment and stared blankly over the steaming waters.

"Because of the secret I hold, this power is so frightening. You see, I cannot predict or see through my own capabilities how or when I am going to die. I have dreaded to see one day, from the hands of the people I will meet and read that I will be killed like how I feared it would be. That's actually the main reason why I avoid reading people's future."

At this point, I feel like the topic is narrowing to something bad.

"Isera, what did you saw from my future?" I repeated.

He painfully smiled and answered, "That's the oddest part actually. Because when I read yours, it wasn't just fragments. I clearly saw this one entire scenario. As if I stood there as you. Breathing and blinking as you. And I felt your despair and anguish... Your tears and mine is one. I saw myself and how I will die in front of you, Aerra...

I saw and I heard from my own lips that I swore that will die for you— and I looked genuinely happy."

So that's why he cried.

I sat there mortified to hear this. At lost of words to say.

But he went on further explaining, "But before that, I also saw other things, unlike the vision of my death, there were other fragments of visions. I saw you will face a lot of hardship on your life ahead, Aerra. But I wasn't able to see if there is happiness at the end of it all because on the day I will die, your life story still continues. Therefore I wasn't able to peek at what lies further ahead."

Now it makes sense why he rather spill everything out on me. Because he knew that he will lay his life for me one day, so he trusts me and came all the way here just to get to know me further.

Isera took a deep breath and closed his eyes, "All this time, from the moment I found out the truth about the graveness of hiding my true identity to the day I realised the irony of my power is, I live my days in dread fearing the day I will see from someone else's future how my life would end. And now, I finally saw the thing that I have feared the most—

I saw it in you. You will be my death— and yet, I honestly feel so happy because I finally met you, someone who would set me free. I never thought how silly I have been all these years."

I grabbed both his shoulder, "Tell me every detail of what you saw... about the scene of your death. What you are wearing, the place, the time of day— everything!"

But Isera gently took my hands off him, "It's the best ending I would have. I rather have not that changed."

I shook my head and insisted, "No, the best ending is when you could stay alive and be free to live on!"

Isera just smiled at me, "There is no other way, Aerra. Sometimes, we can not truly change our destiny."

And with that Isera ended the conversation.

••▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅▅••

I lie awake that night, staring blankly at the canopy of my bed. The entire room was dark but the lights from the two moons found its way pass the curtains and provided a silvery gleam of moonlight inside my room.

Everyone I meet seems to have a role to play in this destiny I have.

I wish I stop meeting new people if that's the case, I thought as I finally stood up and made my way to my vanity armoire.

I opened a box where I kept Nora's brooches and took them out on my hand.

"There's nothing left to do here, huh?" I told myself, studying the brooches. "I reached a dead end. And if I stay here in the castle, someone is bound to get hurt."

I promised Nora I'll give her brooches back and uncle promised me he will provide me the means to travel for it but that's high unlikely to happen at this point with all these Faram dilemma going on.

I remember what Isera said, 'Sometimes, we can not truly change our destiny.'

And I wonder... if struggling can even help me at this point.

'...welcome the darkness'

I shook my head.

I promised Aeron I wouldn't leave.

He's doing his best to keep me safe in here...

From the corner of my eyes, I noticed a unfamiliar dress from my armoire. I took out the red and black dress and realized it is the one I had asked the royal seamstress to make. The same one I had asked to match the anklet Aeron gave me few years ago.

"Hm. Now that I think about it, I haven't tried this on yet."

I wore it on and studied my reflection from the glass of my windows that leads to the balcony.

"This doesn't look so bad..."

Beyond my reflection I can see the two moons outside, they're so big and bright.

The harvest moons...

The gleaming moonlit sky stretched vast to the horizon where the valleys are outlined, I bet the Sage is there somewhere.

I need to talk to the Sage.

And I know won't meet him if I stay here.

But I got to find him...

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