Chapter # 49

The stuff Uncle said to me its not like I don't want to feel better again but it's not necessary going somewhere else just for this minor issue.

I went back to my classroom with my thoughts clouded like this. I honestly speaking don't know what to do. Even if me and Izumi returned on being friends, it still won't change my orientation, I was like this from the start or well mostly because I had no affection from a women in the very beginning. Regardless I can't make Yuu suffer.

******************* After Classes ******************

Yuu and I were heading back to our dorm, and the thoughts were still swirling around my head on what course of action I should pick but I also felt a weird kind of tension going around the atmosphere. Yuu has not spoken to me since the class and all the way back to the room, that's weird he is not really a quiet type person.

I was the first to enter the room and then I thought I should discuss it with Yuu on what Uncle said but before I could say anything

"Are you leaving?" Yuu said.

"Wait Yuu you heard the conversation? You were on the rooftop?"

"Do no doge the question

ANSWER ME

ARE YOU LEAVING?"

Yuu was angry I could hear it from his tune.

"No, Yuu that's not it. I have not decided"

"Which means you will go"

"No, that's not it.

I do not know yet."

Silence~~~~~~~~~~~

What should I do know? This is not how I was planing on making this conversation to go to.

"Shino, I love you!!!!!!!!"

And then Yuu came over and backed me towards the wall and started kissing me. He grabbed my wrists tightly not allowing me any freedom in moving.

The kiss was sweet and light and it made me feel good but

"Yuu stop it "

"Why?"

"What do you mean why?"

"Do you not love me?"

"That's not the main point here right now"

And then he close me off and aggressively kissed me, he pushed him tongue inside my mouth and did not let go me.

I tried to speak but it was a useless attempt, he spared me 5 sec to breath before he showed it back inside my mouth.

He kept doing this straight for half an hour before finally releasing me.

My lips were swollen mess of the act we had done.

The kiss

i have not kissed like that let alone everyone having kissed me back like that.

I could not describe how to explain it exactly.

"Yuu what was that supposed to be" I asked this question looking straight to his direction where his eyes were fixed towards the bottom.

"I will ask again Yuu what was that?"

"You were leaving tomorrow"

"Is that any excuse?"

"It is not but i did not have a choice"

"Did you hear me before you attacked me?

I am asking you a question here

LOOK AT ME!!!!!"

Slowly he peeled his eyes away from the ground and stared at me.

I gestured him to explain and

"Because you were leaving"

"Your answer is as I was leaving it was okay for you to kiss me?" I reddened when saying those words aloud.

"Are you crazy?"

"Yuu listen to me. I was not planning on going and leaving you here.

Though I still did not like what you did but Yuu

I also love you."

and with that Yuu started crying. I giggled and hugged him as his crying did not end. I explained him the whole conversation since i figured out he did not actually listen till the end before he ran away.

We slept with our heads rested with each other.

[7 AM]

We both went to the airport together when I reached Uncle and Yoite was talking to Izumi.

I called them out and came closer.

"Uncle I am going to stay here and get my treatment."

When I said this Uncle looked relived and said

"I knew you would make this decision I have already booked your appointment and I will share the details with you."

I thanked Uncle and then

"Yoite, sorry for everything that happened. I am sorry for my actions"

before Yoite could say anything Yuu spoke

"I still have not forgiven him in hitting you."

"My anger was justified." Yoite spoke

"Only your anger not your action"

"Wow, Yuu you can become a spokesman with that speech" Izumi said.

"I will do it if my boyfriend give me permission" Yuu said.

"Boyfriend?" Yoite and Izumi spoke in unsion.

let me dig a grave here and bury myself I was damn embarrassed.

But Yuu toke my hand and firmly grabbed it and showing it off.

How about I just jump from this floor.

"Shino seriously" Izumi asked.

"Yes, serious. Stop asking I am embarrassed already."

"Shino, thankyou." Yoite suddenly said but I understood and smiled in response.

"Yoite, we need to go." Uncle said.

"Okay

Yuu, take care of this idiot.

Izumi you know already.

and Shino I don't think its necessary anymore now."

"It isn't indeed."

"Goodbye"

Izumi boarded his plane.

Izumi looked at me if he wanted to speak but did otherwise and left.

Where as me and Yuu walked back to our dorms with out usual routine ahead of us and also together with the lives of friend, a family and a lover together. Walking with hands in hands together and smiling with the thoughts of the darkness gradually leaving from me and finally able to smile like I had always wanted.

How I acted was not wrong.

How I made the world turned out to be was not wrong.

How I thought living alone was okay that also was also not wrong.

Our thoughts are not wrong but our lives choices become based on them.

Living alone and fighting alone will never be enough.

It's easier to do that without relying on anyone else

But then that's a choice either you want to live alone with your thoughts or want to break out of your shell to have a life.

Our choices are never wrong, no one has the right to judge it but think for it yourself

Do you want to be with someone?

OR

Do you want to be alone?

I made my decision and now I wish you make a decision in which you are satisfied as well.

My life decision has ended and now choose yours wisely.

******************************************* FIN ********************************************************