After accomplishing Hayabusa's mission, he, Kagura and Hanabi began living in the village peacefully. Unknowingly to them, darkness has been lurking somewhere.
I like the writing so far, keep it up! Excellent character portrayals too with a bit of goofy moments here and there. I was honestly cliffhanged! I expected more chapters xD Pls update soon 👌👌👌
6 years ago
4
L_Asterisk
So cute and childish. Simple writing, making younger readers to relate to this story because it so easy to read. You only need to adjust how you portray every details. I like how you execute the action scene on your first chapters but the story goes nowhere following that after, mind making a good plot to go through.
6 years ago
1
Rhod_Icyfreeze
Most of the chapters are short so it is easy to read and finish the entire chapter. It is so good for readers who don't want long blocks of text. Some part of the story is written in fast-paced while some part is well written in details and there's some written in huge elaboration making the scene(s) and chapters quite long for a simple scene. I like the way you're making the story simple and relatable to the game. Merging characters with a different timeline based on their designs and back stories are really hard.
From a simple story that turns to complicated flow. I think you have to at least provide the plot to know where your story will lead and ends. =)
6 years ago
1
SOPEDDAENG
My friend (pattatass) recommended this, I'm giving you a good review because I can feel you passion and how hardworking you are. Your writing style is good, the only problem is the updates huhu as a reader, I'm so hungry for your updates huhuhu
6 years ago
1
jaja_tes_orio
gusto mo realtalk pre? hindi kagandahan itong gawa mo napakacliche tapos halata na you are winning dahildahil sa kasikatan. kawawa kanaman kahit nagagalingan si lasayo hindi mo parin mapaganda itong gawa mo. Bajsoakwnahxiodnsbwhsoqoqngxd asdfghjklasdfghjklasjdlapapqiwuebdnxmslapquzndux nsisoalwmwnxhxuowpwmwnwhxuxosomwwnshix usowowmanbxjcueopwpwlwjwnbxhxoslwnna hsowkqnsnxjidpapqnwnshuxodowmwnahxuix hakaoamanzhuziskskaknhsiks troll review :D
6 years ago
1
Daoist262360
Reveal Spoiler
6 years ago
1
BAEPSAE
The story is great! Aside from minor typos, the plot and characters in itself have great execution. Keep it up!! Btw, team HAYAGURA forevs!😂✌️ Stay cute neko-chan!😉✌️
6 years ago
1
g4y4jennie
pretty near my standards. sorry about the bluntness, das just how i am. anyways, i like how you based the story on depicting how their battle w hanzo wouldve ended instead of basing it on their adventure. good
6 years ago
1
aratanielartour
So proud of you. lot of potentials knowing that this is your first. Keep going! we believe in you as always!
Can't wait for the next chapter :)
6 years ago
1
Erza_Eucliffe
its good in all but the update is the only problem so it only gets a 2 so yeah if the updates are a little more frequent than i would really enjoy this story
5 years ago
0
dyt92318
YOU SUCK LOL #10 IS BETTER HAHAHA
LOLOLOLOLOLLOOLADOASDKJASLDJALSKDJALKSDJASLKDJASLKDJASLDKJASLDKJASLDKJASDLKJASLDKJASDLKASDJASLOLOLOLOLOLLOOLADOASDKJASLDJALSKDJALKSDJASLKDJASLKDJASLDKJASLDKJASLDKJASDLKJASLDKJASDLKASDJASLOLOLOLOLOLLOOLADOASDKJASLDJALSKDJALKSDJASLKDJASLKDJASLDKJASLDKJASLDKJASDLKJASLDKJASDLKASDJAS
I like the writing so far, keep it up! Excellent character portrayals too with a bit of goofy moments here and there. I was honestly cliffhanged! I expected more chapters xD Pls update soon 👌👌👌
So cute and childish. Simple writing, making younger readers to relate to this story because it so easy to read. You only need to adjust how you portray every details. I like how you execute the action scene on your first chapters but the story goes nowhere following that after, mind making a good plot to go through.
Most of the chapters are short so it is easy to read and finish the entire chapter. It is so good for readers who don't want long blocks of text. Some part of the story is written in fast-paced while some part is well written in details and there's some written in huge elaboration making the scene(s) and chapters quite long for a simple scene. I like the way you're making the story simple and relatable to the game. Merging characters with a different timeline based on their designs and back stories are really hard. From a simple story that turns to complicated flow. I think you have to at least provide the plot to know where your story will lead and ends. =)
My friend (pattatass) recommended this, I'm giving you a good review because I can feel you passion and how hardworking you are. Your writing style is good, the only problem is the updates huhu as a reader, I'm so hungry for your updates huhuhu
gusto mo realtalk pre? hindi kagandahan itong gawa mo napakacliche tapos halata na you are winning dahildahil sa kasikatan. kawawa kanaman kahit nagagalingan si lasayo hindi mo parin mapaganda itong gawa mo. Bajsoakwnahxiodnsbwhsoqoqngxd asdfghjklasdfghjklasjdlapapqiwuebdnxmslapquzndux nsisoalwmwnxhxuowpwmwnwhxuxosomwwnshix usowowmanbxjcueopwpwlwjwnbxhxoslwnna hsowkqnsnxjidpapqnwnshuxodowmwnahxuix hakaoamanzhuziskskaknhsiks troll review :D
Reveal Spoiler
The story is great! Aside from minor typos, the plot and characters in itself have great execution. Keep it up!! Btw, team HAYAGURA forevs!😂✌️ Stay cute neko-chan!😉✌️
pretty near my standards. sorry about the bluntness, das just how i am. anyways, i like how you based the story on depicting how their battle w hanzo wouldve ended instead of basing it on their adventure. good
So proud of you. lot of potentials knowing that this is your first. Keep going! we believe in you as always! Can't wait for the next chapter :)
its good in all but the update is the only problem so it only gets a 2 so yeah if the updates are a little more frequent than i would really enjoy this story
YOU SUCK LOL #10 IS BETTER HAHAHA LOLOLOLOLOLLOOLADOASDKJASLDJALSKDJALKSDJASLKDJASLKDJASLDKJASLDKJASLDKJASDLKJASLDKJASDLKASDJASLOLOLOLOLOLLOOLADOASDKJASLDJALSKDJALKSDJASLKDJASLKDJASLDKJASLDKJASLDKJASDLKJASLDKJASDLKASDJASLOLOLOLOLOLLOOLADOASDKJASLDJALSKDJALKSDJASLKDJASLKDJASLDKJASLDKJASLDKJASDLKJASLDKJASDLKASDJAS