Popularity is a Pain

Emotions. I don't get them. I don't have them. And I never will. At my school, I am known as this super cool, super handsome, nerdy chick magnet. But that's only because of my stupidity on that first day of middle school.

I walk down to the school gate. Others see life, desire, and adventure, but I see pain, misery, and monotony. Well, hopefully no one talks to me. I see a lot of new faces as I walk onto the school campus. Good, if they aren't familiar with me, then I actually have a chance.

I see Itsuki, my supposed best friend, waves at me. I wave back. I kind of feel sorry for him. I walk into my class, and see no one I know except Itsuki. Good.

Now comes the time for self-introductions. This is where a person's reputation and their social status gets decided for the rest of the year. This is a critical moment where if you mess this up in any way, forget about having any friends. Which is exactly what I'm going to do.

As my turn approaches, I remember my fully rehearsed, fool-proof plan that is guaranteed to make my solitary confinement permanent. In fact, I'm sure that no one with common sense will ever talk to me, even just to greet me!

I was asked to introduce myself and I prepared the most unattractive thing I could think of saying: "Hey. My name is Daisuke Eito, and I am an otaku who loves to watch any kind of anime!" Wink! Yes! Nailed it! As I sat down and prepared for a silent life, I waited for my expected scenario to occur. I waited, waited, and finally I was ready to welcome my life alone, but then, my hopeless hope was crushed, and the unpleasant, horrifying reality came to life. The class applauded to my introduction! "That was so brave, man!" "You're cool!" "You're the most admirable person ever!" "Can I be your friend?'

No, no, no, no, no , No, NO! This can't be happening! You guys are supposed to be absolutely disgusted by my hobbies and leave me alone! Instead, you clap, cry tears of joy, and ask if you want to be my friend? What's wrong with these people?

Why? Just Why? I try to do something to lift my curse, but it only perpetuates it? How come the things I want least, I get as often as participation prizes, but the things I want most are always seemingly close, but at the same time, as far away as the Sun?

What is this torture? Give the chains of popularity to someone else! Itsuki deserves it much better than me! Always unappreciated, unnoticed, little friends to talk to, no girl that likes him (well, maybe except for Kiyoko-chan)!

My glorious vision for an antisocial life was crushed, and a gloomy reality of popular life triumphed. As I return to my senses, I get up and get ready for high school. As always on my way to school, an annoying mob of girls crowded me, you know, standard procedure. I eventually shrug them off nicely, once again, standard procedure.

I check the list to see which class I'm in. I find myself to be in the same class as Itsuki and Kiyoko-chan. I guess I'll keep up with this ridiculous act for now, since almost everybody who were in my middle school worked hard to pass the entrance exam* to go to the high school I was going to (Way to go, Itsuki!) and many passed unfortunately.

Our teacher, Ms. Aki introduced a new girl to the class. Seeing Itsuki's reaction, I decide to tease him a little. "Hey, Looks like your dream has come true!" I saw Itsuki reply, but I couldn't exactly catch what he said because a bunch of girls surrounded me as always. I groaned along with everyone else when we heard of the exams for class representative. Anyway, I tried to pick all the wrong answers, so I can live at least a somewhat tranquil life.

When we got the results back, that foreign girl was first, surprisingly out of all of the girls, and I looked for my rank. I started from the bottom, and looked up and I saw... my fate sealed. Oh no, I mixed up the right answers and the wrong answers, so I actually got them all right! No!!!!!!

Classroom representatives have to talk more than any other student, meaning I'll stand out the most, not helping the fact that I already stand out. Well, I guess I will have to forever hold the burden of popularity on my shoulders.

I feel bad for Itsuki as I get to work with the girl his mind is consumed by, while on the other hand I'm not so interested in her. I mean I could see why my friend wants her, but being surrounded by girls every. single. day. However, much as this may sound nice to other guys, it really isn't. It means being asked constantly, nagging, girls trying to get close even though they know nothing about the real me.

That's why I've always invited Itsuki to all of my dates because I know if they really cared for me, they would at least try to talk to my friend, even if I wasn't there.