Chapter 2 : Past Relationships

Let's talk about relationships , Relationships are hard and require some work or effort on our part. Mature relationships work as a team to solve problems and aren't afraid to express their opinions, wants or desires to their significant other. If you can trust the person closest to you then you are probably unwilling or unable to form attachments with other people. Immature relationships are usually ones that feel difficult or forced. If you feel that you are working way to hard to make a relationship work then you are probably in an immature relationship .

Being together isn't just about loving someone but about making that person feel loved, appreciated and safe to be who they are . A relationship is a team effort. You are in this together and it is you two against the world. You have to have each others back. If your partner is unwilling to help get things done or can't be counted upon to do their part then you have an issue. People with successful relationships see themselves as part of a team that is working towards a common goal. Unequal relationships where one partner does all of the heavy lifting leads to resentment and bitterness , so it's better for you to Find someone who will work with you, who will stand back to back with you against the universe. and all the past relationships of Oussama were immature , but was it really his problem or his exes's? .

We all have our issues or baggage. Things come up that we aren't comfortable with. If you have an issue then you should be able to bring it up and discuss it without it erupting into a huge knock down drag out fight. If you can't express what you want or need in a relationship without it devolving into a fight or keeping inside for weeks on end until it becomes a larger problem then there is a serious breakdown in the relationship. People in mature relationships discuss their problems or issues as they come up not after they have been festering for weeks and have poisoned your feelings. and this was one of all the problems that kept Oussama being the bad one in all his past relationships . But let's talk about the worst thing Hiding who you are and it was the easiest thing Oussama can do but no , You should never have to pretend you are anyone other than who you really are. If you think you need to hide a part of yourself because your partner will make fun of you or not find you attractive or interesting anymore then you are in the wrong relationship. We are all different people with different interests and those interests change over time. Even if your partner isn't into the exact same things as you you shouldn't have to hide them , and a lesson from me if you are in a relationship you both should have the space to explore who you are without fear of rejection or insults .

In fact , All his exes wanted to change him , well they tried with no result ( funny no ?) , So you guys and girls have to know that partners are not fixer upper projects you see on the Home and Garden Channel. It is not your job to change your partner into the perfect mate. We all have our own issues and baggage. We will work through those issues or baggage over time and with the support of our partners hopefully grow as people. No one needs someone else to change them or fix them. This attitude is very immature and shows a lack of acceptance of others for who and what they are. If you don't like your partner the way they are then maybe you should find someone you do like.

But there was something that bothered him a lot , his past partners didn't see a future with him and it's bad , but let's not forget that he was the most immature , he really did bad things , and we will talk about it as soon as possible , but let us make things clear ,Your partner maybe be super fun to hang with or has a lot of interesting stories but if you can't see yourself with them in ten years then what are you doing in that relationship? If you are out to just have some fun that's perfectly fine but it is not a very mature relationship. Mature relationships see themselves building a future with their partner, maybe raising a family or growing old together. Mature relationships are in it for the long haul. If you or your partner can't see a future together then maybe there isn't one to see. let's get back to the real story , as we said Oussama had a lot of relationships and of course he can't remember all of it , but there was 4 that made a great impact in his life . Hala , Her hair was as waves of pure earth, softly reflecting the light of the sun; each strand moving freely in an ocean born breeze, a compliment to her stillness. With eyes of river waters, in glossy serenity, her aura seeped into the summer air between us. And in that moment, in that fraction of time, her smile was in every God given feature , it all started with a simple hello in social media , they talked a lot we can say all day long , as the time passed by he knew she were studying in the same college , they first met up in the school , she was 1m59 , she was the cutest ever in his eyes . One day he asked her out , but how ? , he sent her a message but she didn't answer him right away , so he was a little bit nervous , and he began to ask himself will she ignore me ? , but he was believing in himself he knew he can get her , but she wasn't just a challenge for him but he really had feelings for her , but in fact there was no feelings . The next day she answered him :" i'm sorry Oussama i was really busy yesterday and it was a long day for me , but yeah we can catch up today or tomorrow '' . when he saw her message he was the happiest ever , so he told her :" yeah sure maybe tonight , we can do a plan " , she answered : " yesss" . they met near a cafe called Arizona , it was all fun but he said nothing about what he really felt , the date was great . after one weak he decided to tell her that he likes her , so he did it and she told him that she liked him too . Here is a great information Oussama really liked her and he was happy that he was in a relation ship with her , but Hala was the bad one in this story , after 6 months , she decided to meet him , when they met she told him that her parents saw her with him and she has a very strict dad , she told him that she wants a break , she wanted to end the relation ship , and of course he can't accept it just like that , he was anxious and nervous , he told her to think about her decision . The next day he wanted to send her a message to motivate her and support her , but he found out that she blocked him , and she's no longer in the same city . His eyes shifted to the side and became glazed with a glassy layer of tears , as he blinked , they dripped from his eyelids and slid down his cheeks . he bit his lip tightly in attempt to hide any sound that wanted to escape from his mouth , hi lower lip quivered as words slowly made their way out his mouth " I lost her ....'' .

This was the first impact that let Oussama to be the bad guy in everything , he no longer believed in love , so as a revenge he dated a lot of girls . And as i said only 4 has made an impact in his life the first one is Hala , The second one is Ghita , the third is Oumaima and the fourth is Nissrine .

Ghita , The girl had a nose like a cartoon character, or one drawn by a lazy artist at least. The bridge was so low-profile as to be barely there at all; so that on a face of skin all the same honeyed hue, her nose was a bump just above her dusky pink lips. There was no two ways about it, she was cute . and he knows her from his cousin Wiam , she's not really his cousin . In brief , she was the one that showed him that love really exist , that Ghita she really loved him , but he had no feelings for her ... , but as i said it was a good impact .

Oumaima , well Oussama had no words when he first saw her , she is very beautiful ,and she is the one that let him forget Hala a little bit , she was very supportive , and she helped him a lot , they were together 8 months or we can say a year , but there was some misunderstood in this period , the trust was fade out , the communication ended , they had serious problems , one day he accepted the fact that they were not meant for each other , so he talked to him but they fixed the problems , But the real problem is that she trust her friends over him , so this time he finished all this drama . So the impact here is he started to let go people who they don't trust him .

Nissrine , The girl had a voice that was like music under a summer breeze, almost lost against the noise of the Monday morning traffic. Yet somehow it took hold of Ted, making him want to listen all the more. All what he wanted is to hear her voice everyday , but this girl was really intelligent , she helped him in her studies , they laughed , they had a great connexion together , before they started dating , the girl was already in a relationship , she really loved him as she said , but one day everything has gone like nothing happened , and they started dating Nissrine and Oussama , well it was really fast . for them everything was great , but she starts to miss her ex , she just used Oussama to forget about her ex , but guess what mission failed , she didn't forget him . Oussama was really hurt and they broke up , but the still friends till now . And the lesson he got from her is : never get attached to someone too fast , take things slowly . Those were the lessons and impacts he learned from the past relationships , he wanted to end all this and he ended it , but guess what , all those lessons they helped him a lot in his life , but in his pursuit to love he screwed it all because of a girl , the essence of this story . Her name Is Fatine but we will talk about her later , Who's Fatine ? , well things will get clearer soon .